Immediately losing my footing and skidding off the podium, slamming into the guy in second place and a crowd of photographers

Calling it now: whatever app they end up creating will be live for 36 hours max before they pull the plug.

Something about a nauseating visual of guy ragdolling like a badly coded PS2 game with realistic bone crunch sounds just isn't making people want a Big Mac

Something about the visuals and the commitment to the bit in this one always gets me
theonion.com/nation-waist...

Pontius Pilate seething right now, he didn't govern occupied Judea to put up with this kind of slander

M: You're a dinosaur, Bond. A relic from a different age. We're not fighting the Cold War anymore, these are new enemies, with new tactics.

BOND: (104 years old) WHAT??? SFPEAK UP!

It's really funny that he was right next to a source of fresh water and chose to live off the wine anyway lmao

Perhaps spending the entirety of the last election season going down Waterslides and the like was a political misstep? Who can say.

You will dent your floor before you break this glass

Giving up on Twitter was an embarrassingly long process that made me feel pathetic and hate myself. By comparison, giving up on Bluesky will feel like nothing at all. Devs take heed.