Ephemerides
@ephemerides.bsky.social
🔞 NSFW. Grumpy, Gym-addicted, and Geriatric.
Don't cam. Don't call. Don't have Snap. Shit at sexy chat.
Don't cam. Don't call. Don't have Snap. Shit at sexy chat.
Be fair... if we went to the gym together, would we ever make it out of the locker room? 😅
January 13, 2026 at 7:20 AM
Be fair... if we went to the gym together, would we ever make it out of the locker room? 😅
Well, don't blame me if you get wet 😈🍆💦💦
January 10, 2026 at 4:49 PM
Well, don't blame me if you get wet 😈🍆💦💦
😂😂😂 I know the feeling. If that worked as a diet I should be falling down grates by now.
January 10, 2026 at 3:45 PM
😂😂😂 I know the feeling. If that worked as a diet I should be falling down grates by now.
You know I meant cow juice, not man juice, right? 😏😈😅
January 10, 2026 at 3:23 PM
You know I meant cow juice, not man juice, right? 😏😈😅
Abstaining from milk is bearable. Abstaining from chocolate, on the other hand 😭
January 10, 2026 at 2:51 PM
Abstaining from milk is bearable. Abstaining from chocolate, on the other hand 😭
Not allowed milk on this effing diet... is Americano and bed acceptable? 🙏
January 10, 2026 at 12:41 PM
Not allowed milk on this effing diet... is Americano and bed acceptable? 🙏
I wouldn't believe me, either 😅
January 10, 2026 at 12:38 PM
I wouldn't believe me, either 😅
I wish! But thank you. 🥰
January 10, 2026 at 12:37 PM
I wish! But thank you. 🥰
Oh yes, definitely... by bad boys 😈
January 9, 2026 at 7:45 AM
Oh yes, definitely... by bad boys 😈
Finding places to be naked is what keeps getting me out of the door 😅
January 8, 2026 at 9:59 AM
Finding places to be naked is what keeps getting me out of the door 😅
Must be over-saturated. I'm actually pastier than Casper. 👻
January 8, 2026 at 9:57 AM
Must be over-saturated. I'm actually pastier than Casper. 👻
You may. My God, you may. 👀🥵
May I have a little taste? 👅😈
May I have a little taste? 👅😈
January 8, 2026 at 8:18 AM
You may. My God, you may. 👀🥵
May I have a little taste? 👅😈
May I have a little taste? 👅😈
Absolutely not. The thought of any of these reprobates going near it 😅
January 7, 2026 at 8:59 AM
Absolutely not. The thought of any of these reprobates going near it 😅
What, like throwing things at me and seeing if you can hit my waggling dick? 😅
January 7, 2026 at 7:15 AM
What, like throwing things at me and seeing if you can hit my waggling dick? 😅