Gem City Expat
@gemcityexpat.bsky.social
STR 10, DEX 8, CON 12, INT 15, WIS 14, CHA 13. Opinions my own.
5yo: I like dogs, cats, birdies, and butterflies. Those are the only animals I like.
Me: What about cheetahs?
5 yo: They are a kind of CAT.
Me: That's fair.
5 yo: Oh! I like zebras too.
Me: What about cheetahs?
5 yo: They are a kind of CAT.
Me: That's fair.
5 yo: Oh! I like zebras too.
January 4, 2026 at 11:33 PM
5yo: I like dogs, cats, birdies, and butterflies. Those are the only animals I like.
Me: What about cheetahs?
5 yo: They are a kind of CAT.
Me: That's fair.
5 yo: Oh! I like zebras too.
Me: What about cheetahs?
5 yo: They are a kind of CAT.
Me: That's fair.
5 yo: Oh! I like zebras too.
Fast food chicken sandwich opinions...
- Popeye's is PRETTY GOOD. Not transcendent. People must've just been really bored that one month.
- CFA's is FINE. Absolutely not worth crossing battle lines over.
- McD's fancy offerings are MEH, but the value McChicken still feels right sometimes.
- Popeye's is PRETTY GOOD. Not transcendent. People must've just been really bored that one month.
- CFA's is FINE. Absolutely not worth crossing battle lines over.
- McD's fancy offerings are MEH, but the value McChicken still feels right sometimes.
Remember when everyone was going apeshit over chicken sandwiches?
January 4, 2026 at 6:03 PM
Fast food chicken sandwich opinions...
- Popeye's is PRETTY GOOD. Not transcendent. People must've just been really bored that one month.
- CFA's is FINE. Absolutely not worth crossing battle lines over.
- McD's fancy offerings are MEH, but the value McChicken still feels right sometimes.
- Popeye's is PRETTY GOOD. Not transcendent. People must've just been really bored that one month.
- CFA's is FINE. Absolutely not worth crossing battle lines over.
- McD's fancy offerings are MEH, but the value McChicken still feels right sometimes.
I missed National Science Fiction Day yesterday, but here are some mostly-nice SF-adjacent memories:
One time I saw a gorgeous woman in a STAR TREK costume and decided I'd be doing a disservice to nerdy guys everywhere if I didn't shoot my shot.
We now have kids together and stuff.
(1/12)
One time I saw a gorgeous woman in a STAR TREK costume and decided I'd be doing a disservice to nerdy guys everywhere if I didn't shoot my shot.
We now have kids together and stuff.
(1/12)
January 4, 2026 at 4:59 AM
I missed National Science Fiction Day yesterday, but here are some mostly-nice SF-adjacent memories:
One time I saw a gorgeous woman in a STAR TREK costume and decided I'd be doing a disservice to nerdy guys everywhere if I didn't shoot my shot.
We now have kids together and stuff.
(1/12)
One time I saw a gorgeous woman in a STAR TREK costume and decided I'd be doing a disservice to nerdy guys everywhere if I didn't shoot my shot.
We now have kids together and stuff.
(1/12)
KINDA Gift of the Magi?
I hauled the kids to EVERY train garden in town because their mom, who adores train gardens and goes every year, had to work and couldn't go herself.
...turns out she doesn't give a Kringle about train gardens.
She just likes free things to do with kids over winter break.
I hauled the kids to EVERY train garden in town because their mom, who adores train gardens and goes every year, had to work and couldn't go herself.
...turns out she doesn't give a Kringle about train gardens.
She just likes free things to do with kids over winter break.
January 2, 2026 at 10:41 PM
KINDA Gift of the Magi?
I hauled the kids to EVERY train garden in town because their mom, who adores train gardens and goes every year, had to work and couldn't go herself.
...turns out she doesn't give a Kringle about train gardens.
She just likes free things to do with kids over winter break.
I hauled the kids to EVERY train garden in town because their mom, who adores train gardens and goes every year, had to work and couldn't go herself.
...turns out she doesn't give a Kringle about train gardens.
She just likes free things to do with kids over winter break.
5yo: Daddy I don't like Peppa Pig anymore it's too scary.
Me: Ha! Well, Bluey is way cooler and-
*notices she looks serious*
Me: Hey Baby-Baby, why is Peppa scary?
...turns out Nani let her watch a Peppa ep on YouTube, but it was a leisurely scary "fan"-made HORROR EDIT.
Me: Ha! Well, Bluey is way cooler and-
*notices she looks serious*
Me: Hey Baby-Baby, why is Peppa scary?
...turns out Nani let her watch a Peppa ep on YouTube, but it was a leisurely scary "fan"-made HORROR EDIT.
January 2, 2026 at 3:47 PM
5yo: Daddy I don't like Peppa Pig anymore it's too scary.
Me: Ha! Well, Bluey is way cooler and-
*notices she looks serious*
Me: Hey Baby-Baby, why is Peppa scary?
...turns out Nani let her watch a Peppa ep on YouTube, but it was a leisurely scary "fan"-made HORROR EDIT.
Me: Ha! Well, Bluey is way cooler and-
*notices she looks serious*
Me: Hey Baby-Baby, why is Peppa scary?
...turns out Nani let her watch a Peppa ep on YouTube, but it was a leisurely scary "fan"-made HORROR EDIT.
I absolutely hate the Maryland flag, and things patterned off of the Maryland flag, so I just pretend that Orioles and Ravens merch are official Maryland iconography.
January 2, 2026 at 2:52 PM
I absolutely hate the Maryland flag, and things patterned off of the Maryland flag, so I just pretend that Orioles and Ravens merch are official Maryland iconography.
Reposted by Gem City Expat
And please, PLEASE let us not forget that time in 2023 when Karen Smith was elected President of the school board in Bucks County, Pa and swore her oath on a stack of banned books. The most gangsta oath ever! Just brilliant. www.edweek.org/leadership/t...
This School Board President Took Her Oath on a Stack of Contested Books. Here's Why
The school board for Central Bucks County, Pa., has been at the center of divisive political debates.
www.edweek.org
January 1, 2026 at 11:21 PM
And please, PLEASE let us not forget that time in 2023 when Karen Smith was elected President of the school board in Bucks County, Pa and swore her oath on a stack of banned books. The most gangsta oath ever! Just brilliant. www.edweek.org/leadership/t...
"I have seen the David
and the Mona Lisa too
and I have heard Doc Watson play 'Columbus Stockade Blues'."
- Guy Clark, "Dublin Blues"
and the Mona Lisa too
and I have heard Doc Watson play 'Columbus Stockade Blues'."
- Guy Clark, "Dublin Blues"
January 1, 2026 at 8:20 PM
"I have seen the David
and the Mona Lisa too
and I have heard Doc Watson play 'Columbus Stockade Blues'."
- Guy Clark, "Dublin Blues"
and the Mona Lisa too
and I have heard Doc Watson play 'Columbus Stockade Blues'."
- Guy Clark, "Dublin Blues"
Controversial take:
If just 5% of assholes shopping for pavement princess pick-up trucks for their white-collar commutes opted to become Cybertruck assholes instead it would be a MASSIVE short-term boost for EV infrastructure development and EV adoption in general.
If just 5% of assholes shopping for pavement princess pick-up trucks for their white-collar commutes opted to become Cybertruck assholes instead it would be a MASSIVE short-term boost for EV infrastructure development and EV adoption in general.
December 30, 2025 at 4:50 AM
Controversial take:
If just 5% of assholes shopping for pavement princess pick-up trucks for their white-collar commutes opted to become Cybertruck assholes instead it would be a MASSIVE short-term boost for EV infrastructure development and EV adoption in general.
If just 5% of assholes shopping for pavement princess pick-up trucks for their white-collar commutes opted to become Cybertruck assholes instead it would be a MASSIVE short-term boost for EV infrastructure development and EV adoption in general.
Several times each year I am forced by my children and their mother to tour the aquarium.
When this happens, I console myself by taking the crappiest pictures I possibly can of the pallid sturgeon (Scaphirhynchus albus).
I get it adequately wrong about 90% of the time.
When this happens, I console myself by taking the crappiest pictures I possibly can of the pallid sturgeon (Scaphirhynchus albus).
I get it adequately wrong about 90% of the time.
December 29, 2025 at 4:11 AM
Several times each year I am forced by my children and their mother to tour the aquarium.
When this happens, I console myself by taking the crappiest pictures I possibly can of the pallid sturgeon (Scaphirhynchus albus).
I get it adequately wrong about 90% of the time.
When this happens, I console myself by taking the crappiest pictures I possibly can of the pallid sturgeon (Scaphirhynchus albus).
I get it adequately wrong about 90% of the time.
A funny thing about Will Stancil is that whenever he says something that makes me roll my eyes the dissenters in his comments are such complete dipshits that I have to double-check to make sure he doesn't actually have a point.
December 28, 2025 at 4:41 PM
A funny thing about Will Stancil is that whenever he says something that makes me roll my eyes the dissenters in his comments are such complete dipshits that I have to double-check to make sure he doesn't actually have a point.
Now that Christmas is over I can once again enjoy Leonard Cohen's "Hallelujah" without flying into a decidedly un-holly and un-jolly rage at people who act like it's a Christmas song.
It's not my LEAST favorite "people spectacularly miss the point" popular song but it's easily in my top three.
It's not my LEAST favorite "people spectacularly miss the point" popular song but it's easily in my top three.
December 28, 2025 at 1:01 AM
Now that Christmas is over I can once again enjoy Leonard Cohen's "Hallelujah" without flying into a decidedly un-holly and un-jolly rage at people who act like it's a Christmas song.
It's not my LEAST favorite "people spectacularly miss the point" popular song but it's easily in my top three.
It's not my LEAST favorite "people spectacularly miss the point" popular song but it's easily in my top three.
(Sub)urban Libs/Progs let this shit fester in our own spaces for years.
A decade ago I got kicked from a Dayton liberal politics FB group for dropping cites on a Yellow Springs-ass (IYKYK) granola mom that spat anti-vax bullshit.
The word "mansplain" was not used but the concept was described.
A decade ago I got kicked from a Dayton liberal politics FB group for dropping cites on a Yellow Springs-ass (IYKYK) granola mom that spat anti-vax bullshit.
The word "mansplain" was not used but the concept was described.
talking to my mom who is a pediatrician in a rural area and… the whole antivaxx thing is so much worse than you can imagine
RFK Jr. should be sent to The Hague
RFK Jr. should be sent to The Hague
December 27, 2025 at 5:08 PM
(Sub)urban Libs/Progs let this shit fester in our own spaces for years.
A decade ago I got kicked from a Dayton liberal politics FB group for dropping cites on a Yellow Springs-ass (IYKYK) granola mom that spat anti-vax bullshit.
The word "mansplain" was not used but the concept was described.
A decade ago I got kicked from a Dayton liberal politics FB group for dropping cites on a Yellow Springs-ass (IYKYK) granola mom that spat anti-vax bullshit.
The word "mansplain" was not used but the concept was described.
And Tiny Tim, who did NOT die, was the color of television, tuned to a dead channel.
And Tiny Tim, who did NOT die, took the midnight train going anywhere
December 25, 2025 at 5:14 PM
And Tiny Tim, who did NOT die, was the color of television, tuned to a dead channel.
Reposted by Gem City Expat
All of these bootlegged copies of the 60 Minutes segment flooding my feed (saying, ‘Watch it quick! Before it disappears!’) makes me feel like I’m in the Soviet Union and just got some black market foreign newspaper I need to hide under a floorboard in my house.
This is where America is now
This is where America is now
December 23, 2025 at 1:58 AM
All of these bootlegged copies of the 60 Minutes segment flooding my feed (saying, ‘Watch it quick! Before it disappears!’) makes me feel like I’m in the Soviet Union and just got some black market foreign newspaper I need to hide under a floorboard in my house.
This is where America is now
This is where America is now
Put Cheetos on top of my homemade pumpkin chili instead of corn chips and gotta say I am closing out 2025 on a HIGH NOTE.
December 23, 2025 at 1:34 AM
Put Cheetos on top of my homemade pumpkin chili instead of corn chips and gotta say I am closing out 2025 on a HIGH NOTE.
The problems with saying "what friggin' post did I like that caused my feed to be inundated with [kink/subculture I was previously blissfully unaware of]?" are:
1) For all I know naming it will just aggravate the algorithm
2) My friends are all jerks who will gleefully aggravate me themselves
1) For all I know naming it will just aggravate the algorithm
2) My friends are all jerks who will gleefully aggravate me themselves
December 21, 2025 at 11:10 PM
The problems with saying "what friggin' post did I like that caused my feed to be inundated with [kink/subculture I was previously blissfully unaware of]?" are:
1) For all I know naming it will just aggravate the algorithm
2) My friends are all jerks who will gleefully aggravate me themselves
1) For all I know naming it will just aggravate the algorithm
2) My friends are all jerks who will gleefully aggravate me themselves
Oh FFS yall's reaction to the "Patriot Games" thing is embarrassing.
Miss America and Little League World Series have done "The top from each state/territory compete" for DECADES and I've never seen acting treat it as a harbinger of impending YA Sci-Fi dystopia.
It's high school sports. Ignore it.
Miss America and Little League World Series have done "The top from each state/territory compete" for DECADES and I've never seen acting treat it as a harbinger of impending YA Sci-Fi dystopia.
It's high school sports. Ignore it.
December 21, 2025 at 7:11 PM
Oh FFS yall's reaction to the "Patriot Games" thing is embarrassing.
Miss America and Little League World Series have done "The top from each state/territory compete" for DECADES and I've never seen acting treat it as a harbinger of impending YA Sci-Fi dystopia.
It's high school sports. Ignore it.
Miss America and Little League World Series have done "The top from each state/territory compete" for DECADES and I've never seen acting treat it as a harbinger of impending YA Sci-Fi dystopia.
It's high school sports. Ignore it.
Machine: Input loyalty number
Me: What's the area code here?
Cashier: The what?
Me: First 3 phone digits.
Cashier: I won't give you my number, SIR.
Me (to other customer): Can you-
Customer: 555
*types 555-867-5309*
Machine: Number accepted!
Customer: Cool trick!
Me: Thanks!
Cashier: Huh?
Me: What's the area code here?
Cashier: The what?
Me: First 3 phone digits.
Cashier: I won't give you my number, SIR.
Me (to other customer): Can you-
Customer: 555
*types 555-867-5309*
Machine: Number accepted!
Customer: Cool trick!
Me: Thanks!
Cashier: Huh?
December 21, 2025 at 4:08 AM
Machine: Input loyalty number
Me: What's the area code here?
Cashier: The what?
Me: First 3 phone digits.
Cashier: I won't give you my number, SIR.
Me (to other customer): Can you-
Customer: 555
*types 555-867-5309*
Machine: Number accepted!
Customer: Cool trick!
Me: Thanks!
Cashier: Huh?
Me: What's the area code here?
Cashier: The what?
Me: First 3 phone digits.
Cashier: I won't give you my number, SIR.
Me (to other customer): Can you-
Customer: 555
*types 555-867-5309*
Machine: Number accepted!
Customer: Cool trick!
Me: Thanks!
Cashier: Huh?
Me: So I know it came out in 2024 but I'm going to declare Vulfmon's "Disco Snails" the best song of 2025 as well.
💜: That makes sense.
6-Year-Old: ...
Me: I might go ahead and use it for 2026 as well.
💜: I would expect nothing le-
6-Year-Old: NO YOU CANNOT IT CANNOT BE THE TOP SONG FOR 2026.
💜: That makes sense.
6-Year-Old: ...
Me: I might go ahead and use it for 2026 as well.
💜: I would expect nothing le-
6-Year-Old: NO YOU CANNOT IT CANNOT BE THE TOP SONG FOR 2026.
December 20, 2025 at 6:51 AM
Me: So I know it came out in 2024 but I'm going to declare Vulfmon's "Disco Snails" the best song of 2025 as well.
💜: That makes sense.
6-Year-Old: ...
Me: I might go ahead and use it for 2026 as well.
💜: I would expect nothing le-
6-Year-Old: NO YOU CANNOT IT CANNOT BE THE TOP SONG FOR 2026.
💜: That makes sense.
6-Year-Old: ...
Me: I might go ahead and use it for 2026 as well.
💜: I would expect nothing le-
6-Year-Old: NO YOU CANNOT IT CANNOT BE THE TOP SONG FOR 2026.
Henry Kissinger lived to be 100.
Dick Cheney made it to 84...after five heart attacks and a heart transplant.
Fred Trump was 93. So was Ronald Reagan.
Y'all are dreaming.
Dick Cheney made it to 84...after five heart attacks and a heart transplant.
Fred Trump was 93. So was Ronald Reagan.
Y'all are dreaming.
December 16, 2025 at 12:20 AM
Henry Kissinger lived to be 100.
Dick Cheney made it to 84...after five heart attacks and a heart transplant.
Fred Trump was 93. So was Ronald Reagan.
Y'all are dreaming.
Dick Cheney made it to 84...after five heart attacks and a heart transplant.
Fred Trump was 93. So was Ronald Reagan.
Y'all are dreaming.
"Hey, I noticed that you made a comment about how the person in this news story is part of Demographic A.
Turns out they're actually Demographic B.
Did you mean to say that about Demographic B?
Why would you say that about Demographic B?"
- Me, getting blocked by some asshole every damn time.
Turns out they're actually Demographic B.
Did you mean to say that about Demographic B?
Why would you say that about Demographic B?"
- Me, getting blocked by some asshole every damn time.
December 15, 2025 at 3:14 AM
"Hey, I noticed that you made a comment about how the person in this news story is part of Demographic A.
Turns out they're actually Demographic B.
Did you mean to say that about Demographic B?
Why would you say that about Demographic B?"
- Me, getting blocked by some asshole every damn time.
Turns out they're actually Demographic B.
Did you mean to say that about Demographic B?
Why would you say that about Demographic B?"
- Me, getting blocked by some asshole every damn time.
Reposted by Gem City Expat
It’s so cool that every website is just Like This now. We used to send guys to the chair for putting pop-up ads on their sites. Now if I want to read something I have to read single lines between autoplaying video ads that use so much RAM they force the browser to reload every 5 seconds.
December 15, 2025 at 12:27 AM
It’s so cool that every website is just Like This now. We used to send guys to the chair for putting pop-up ads on their sites. Now if I want to read something I have to read single lines between autoplaying video ads that use so much RAM they force the browser to reload every 5 seconds.
I suppose a lot of folks have a "deeply awkward date night film selection" story.
Mine is "Inherent Vice" (2014) but honestly we deserved it because we were way too old to be doing second-date messing around in the back of a theater anyway.
Mine is "Inherent Vice" (2014) but honestly we deserved it because we were way too old to be doing second-date messing around in the back of a theater anyway.
Raising the always fun question: What are your most memorable theater-going experiences?
Mine also include The Matrix, Blair Witch, and being way too stoned in Belgium when Fellowship of the Ring was sold out so we sat in the back row for Mulholland Drive instead.
Mine also include The Matrix, Blair Witch, and being way too stoned in Belgium when Fellowship of the Ring was sold out so we sat in the back row for Mulholland Drive instead.
It was hands-down one of the most memorable theater-going experiences I can remember, a collective 30-minute butt-clench/armrest-grab for the final climb. And we knew he lived! Wild.
December 14, 2025 at 11:27 PM
I suppose a lot of folks have a "deeply awkward date night film selection" story.
Mine is "Inherent Vice" (2014) but honestly we deserved it because we were way too old to be doing second-date messing around in the back of a theater anyway.
Mine is "Inherent Vice" (2014) but honestly we deserved it because we were way too old to be doing second-date messing around in the back of a theater anyway.
Overheard: "Why are there so many sculptures of TRAINS?"
(The name of the ice sculpture exhibition is "The Polar Express".)
(The name of the ice sculpture exhibition is "The Polar Express".)
December 14, 2025 at 7:28 PM
Overheard: "Why are there so many sculptures of TRAINS?"
(The name of the ice sculpture exhibition is "The Polar Express".)
(The name of the ice sculpture exhibition is "The Polar Express".)