calm down, we’re cleaning it.

i do want to state for the record there have been no bbq chips in this apartment tho.

Alex from our time working together, while he was in nursing school. Later, he moved to ICU, working as a nurse to support critically ill Veterans. He had such a great attitude. We’d chat between patients about trying to get in a mountain bike ride together. Will never happen now

this is the person who took my number after exchanging maybe three sentences of info, and then immediately offered herself as an ear if i want to “chat” about my abuse. like why do you want to know that so quickly. who are you.

i didn’t respond to her last text asking what my “work commitment” was this weekend (it wasn’t urgent while the horrors were all-consuming, and i had established again WE ARE LOOKING AT NEXT WEEKEND) and then she asked again this morning if i want to meet today before the storm.

i —

i’ve had to say three times now that i can do something next weekend, the weekend of the 31st, and i think she’s just been thinking i’m concerned about the snowstorm this weekend?

like girl no i figured i was going to be overwhelmed by grief this week so let’s recover ok.

i had one loose goal this week and it’s to finish this damn painting so if we could rally some positive energy for that, that would be great.

sorry if this whole bit is a bummer, besties, it might be what i base any immediately forthcoming artwork on so we may be here for a while.

like i can appreciate a little flirting on the timeline but holy fucking shit read the room oh my god