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JazzReads📚 @jazzreads.bsky.social · 13h

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Aaron Bady @zunguzungu.bsky.social · 16h

Dolly Parton called a press conference to clarify formally that no weapon formed against her will prosper

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Hattie @hattiebeth.bsky.social · 20h

theonion.com/apartment-li...

Apartment Listing Cagey About Whether Unit Has Floor

CHICAGO—Scouring through the photos in search of a more revealing angle, apartment-hunter George Marvin expressed concern Thursday over a two-bedroom listing that was for some reason being cagey about...

theonion.com

Hattie @hattiebeth.bsky.social · 20h

I've dealt with some dicey landlords in some pretty crummy buildings. The fridge might look like hell. Maybe the previous tenant DID use the crisper drawer as the cat's litter box and I was told to bleach it and put it back in the fridge...but it keeps food cold... and it comes included in the rent.

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Hattie @hattiebeth.bsky.social · 1d

Thank you for finding that quote.

Hattie @hattiebeth.bsky.social · 1d

Yeah, I thought only women did this or that it's coded as "1990s unconfident girl in a meeting" and that we all use vocal fry to negate that now. My teen kid and I only use upspeak when we are joking around and pretending to be insufferably pedantic. "Um actually, mom, did you know deez nutz?"

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Jess Piper @piperformissouri.bsky.social · 2d

Question…

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Hattie @hattiebeth.bsky.social · 1d

As a midwesterner, this is how I imagine all burly New Yorkers. Not "nice" people, but "good" people.

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Hattie @hattiebeth.bsky.social · 3d

There's a cardinal yelling it up outside and I wonder if the townie birds are just excited when the other birds migrate back to Florida or whatever. No more tourists crowding the feeder and flying slowly and chirping about. #birds

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Cristian Farias @cristianfarias.com · 3d

This video of Chicagoans intervening to save a man from being abducted off the streets by ICE is making the rounds on Instagram.

Community action works.

Source: www.instagram.com/reel/DPZL2AL...

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Hattie @hattiebeth.bsky.social · 3d

It is 85 degrees out in October but I am entering hibernation mode. Dinner is bagged salad kit + can of tuna for dinner. Breakfast is 4 shots of espresso. Lunch is cheese and crackers with apple. Snack is "hot powerboat from glove compartment" Here is footage of me and my cat.

a bear and a tiger are hugging each other

Alt: a bear and a tiger are hugging each other

media.tenor.com

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Philip Bump @pbump.com · 4d

A sex offender registry but for people with loud motorcycles and instead of going door to door to announce they live there they have to have a giant air horn pointing at their house that neighbors are allowed to trigger once a day.

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Jonathan Ladd @jonmladd.bsky.social · 4d

The Declaration of Independence says the foundation of US government is the idea that all people are created equal by God. Their rights are “inalienable.” Our Constitution gives, at a minimum, all humans born on US soil citizenship. No person needs to express gratitude. Their rights are not a favor.

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The Life of Sharks 🇮🇪🇵🇸🇺🇦🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️ @thelifeofsharks.com · 4d

Sean “Diddy” Combs to spend his first day in prison exclaiming, “uh…uh…yeah…uh”, over the threats of larger, more violent inmates.

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Hattie @hattiebeth.bsky.social · 5d

I want all of them dragged in front of The Hague. Here is the cat impeding progress on knitwear.

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Hattie @hattiebeth.bsky.social · 5d

I know state law prohibits cooperation, so that's cool I guess.

Hattie @hattiebeth.bsky.social · 5d

I'm actually shocked that Chicago PD is putting up with these people running amok and terrorizing everyone for show, but I appreciate these small gestures.

Ron Filipkowski @ronfilipkowski.bsky.social · 5d

Kristi Noem is mad they wouldn’t let her in to use the restroom in Illinois today.

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Hattie @hattiebeth.bsky.social · 5d

My vision sucks, ok. But these giant dialog boxes with extra white space and giant font are the computer equivalent of slow talkers. I do not care about your pretty gui. Get to the point and be functional jfc

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Hattie @hattiebeth.bsky.social · 5d

Who knew I was at the age where encountering windows 11 and it's stupid giant useless print dialogue box would put me into a rage?

a man in a green suit and tie is smiling in a dark room

Alt: Chris Farley about to lose his shit when he realizes they've served him instant coffee

media.tenor.com

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Patrick Cosmos @veryimportant.lawyer · Sep 8

working on a new unified theory of american reality i'm calling "everyone is twelve now"

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Larry Glickman @larryglickman.bsky.social · 10d

Interesting to note that the coal industry in the U.S. employs just a tad over 40,000 people, according to the BLS. The same source tells us that 64,000 people work at wineries.

Aaron Rupar @atrupar.com · 10d

Energy Secretary Chris Wright on Fox: "We're announcing today expanded programs to help the American coal industry. We're helping it because for years it has been under assault. It was out of fashion with the chardonnay set in San Francisco, Boulder, and NYC ... coal just makes the world go round."

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Hattie @hattiebeth.bsky.social · 9d

Got on a wild tangent with my partner just now about how much I hate Hey, Whaddya Know? I listened to so much NPR when I was a SAHM and that was the show that broke me. The genesis of this grumpy reverie was explaining why I hate vocal jazz and some musical theatre.

Lisa Simpson: "I just hate them so much."

Hattie @hattiebeth.bsky.social · 11d

It's how I figured it out, honestly. She's a gift.

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Hattie @hattiebeth.bsky.social · 11d

Saturdays are for thankless chores and "the special times we share" with Reba. I like to pretend that her little theme song is based on a maudlin 80s commercial campaign, like Hoover or Folgers #caturday

A calico cat looking content getting her head scratched.

A calico cat getting her head scratched.

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TheSnarkTank @thesnarktank.bsky.social · 14d

We need to quit wasting time finding a scapegoat for autism, and instead focus all of our efforts on finding a cure for Dunning-Kruger.

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