Apprentice to a pirate

In battle, if someone says: "I'll draw their fire," and another person says: "I'll cover you," what does that mean? I thought "to cover" someone meant to suppress or draw fire away from them.

During small conference presentations, there's always someone who is already vaguely familiar with the topic who tries to ask an in-depth question before the speaker even gets to slide three.

My 3yo niece wanted to show off how good she is at swimming, so she laid facedown on the tile floor and slunk along like an inchworm

One thing I always forget about BAND OF BROTHERS is how, right when they're doing the horror movie setup for the Battle of the Bulge, one of the most suspenseful and frightening parts of the war, Jimmy Fallon shows up.

Nobody asks "Hey, can I start reading this series in book 2?" But apparently people are asking "Do I need to play Hades before I play Hades 2?"

men would rather be elon musk than go to therapy

all of this will be lost like tears in rain

We should be able to turn unused invites into disinvites now

New favorite malapropism: "Left to my own vices..."

Makes it sound like you've got plans and schemes, but undertones of a cry for help.

Walking through Rome trying to order multiples of food items, but it's hard to speak in Numerals.

The best thing about this place is the complete irrelevance of humanity in the face of the Great Old Ones. Cosmic Bluesky; eldritch horrors