Lightnews — Scholar-powered news

Hexagonal Crank @hexagonalcrank.bsky.social · 3h

Dammit, you just reminded my ADHD brain that patreon rejected my credit card this month despite the fact I’ve been using it fine all week. Gotta get on that shit 🫤

Hexagonal Crank @hexagonalcrank.bsky.social · 19h

Wow. Lauren Boebert confirmed in the Swan-verse.

Branson Reese @bransonreese.bsky.social · Sep 17

swanboy.com

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Hexagonal Crank @hexagonalcrank.bsky.social · 20h

Gavin Newsom wants to grit his path to the Presidential nomination with the lives of LGTBQ+ people.

Be better than this, George.

Reposted by Hexagonal Crank

LGBTQ Nation @lgbtqnation.com · 23h

Gavin Newsom vetoes gender education bill, declines to sign other trans protections - buff.ly/MTUAV85

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Hexagonal Crank @hexagonalcrank.bsky.social · 2d

Had to read through twice just to make sure you hadn‘t snuck a “Cosby” in there.

Hexagonal Crank @hexagonalcrank.bsky.social · 2d

- travelled every non-North American English speaking country planting the "y"s y'all insist on using to spell "tyres" like some mental Johnny Appleseed

- kept the rent from being too damn high

- yo Mama.

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Hexagonal Crank @hexagonalcrank.bsky.social · 2d

Or, as I often tease my Wiccan fiancee, it is pronounced "Sam Hain" for whom we celebrate the life and accomplishments every October 31st.

Accomplishments to date include:

- being the real life cousin of actor Corey Haim, despite being born in the 1700s

- Invented basketball

1/2

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Hexagonal Crank @hexagonalcrank.bsky.social · 3d

Hmmm. Who’s got the nicest hat? Doesn’t matter what you do to the NPC but that hat has to be DESTROYED. 🤪

Hexagonal Crank @hexagonalcrank.bsky.social · 4d

Plus, they’re not getting paid. Wonder what their attention span at the Super Bowl is going to be like

Hexagonal Crank @hexagonalcrank.bsky.social · 4d

Your future place in politics is confirmed.

Hexagonal Crank @hexagonalcrank.bsky.social · 6d

I remember when Robert used to write jokes instead of laugh at ridiculousness the world.

Good times =)

Hexagonal Crank @hexagonalcrank.bsky.social · 7d

This may or may not shock you to find out, but they DID choose. Many, many, many, years ago 🤣

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Hexagonal Crank @hexagonalcrank.bsky.social · 7d

Look at the pus side.

At least women won't have to watch their show.

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Hexagonal Crank @hexagonalcrank.bsky.social · 9d

I don't know...

How would he look in a blonde wig?

Hexagonal Crank @hexagonalcrank.bsky.social · 9d

Kash Patel already gave thoughts and prayers so we know the shooter was white.

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Hexagonal Crank @hexagonalcrank.bsky.social · 9d

Say what we want about you Americans, but your stealth tie technology is next level.

Hexagonal Crank @hexagonalcrank.bsky.social · 10d

<doesn’t even look up from his 1990s style newspaper>

“Continue to be re-elected by the same people who voted them in last time. Or was that too obvious for a complicit media?”

Hexagonal Crank @hexagonalcrank.bsky.social · 12d

Pfft. We knew it was you.

Hexagonal Crank @hexagonalcrank.bsky.social · 13d

Remember when we all said "This administration is too stupid and inept to pull off some sort of secret grand conspiracy to achieve monumental changes."

This. This is what we meant.

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Hexagonal Crank @hexagonalcrank.bsky.social · 13d

George Micheal is weeping from heaven.

Hexagonal Crank @hexagonalcrank.bsky.social · 13d

Well, you know...can't let a woman get TOO big a platform to talk from. <sad rimshot>

Hexagonal Crank @hexagonalcrank.bsky.social · 13d

Nah, it’s like having someone in your life that has a Canada goose in their house.

“You know you can just get rid of the goose, clean up all the shit, and fix the door so it can’t get in again?”

“No, my brother-in-law will keep letting it in. Now, let me tell you what the goose did yesterday…”

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Hexagonal Crank @hexagonalcrank.bsky.social · 14d

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Hexagonal Crank @hexagonalcrank.bsky.social · 14d

It's the heart of that plate of spaghetti you buried beneath the library floor boards. Your guild betrays you.

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Hexagonal Crank @hexagonalcrank.bsky.social · 15d

In the middle of Severance and Murderbot with the fiancee at the moment. Both quality.

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