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H. Perry Horton

@hperryhorton.bsky.social

4.7K followers 14K following 2.4K posts

New novel DON'T LET THE DARKNESS EAT YOU UP out 10.30.25 Author of RENEWAL, HERITAGE, EUSTACE SAVES et al, plus three books about TWIN PEAKS. Screenwriter of 2-HEADED SHARK ATTACK, A HAUNTING IN SALEM et al My books: https://shorturl.at/AuKlV

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H. Perry Horton @hperryhorton.bsky.social · 20d

Final Cover Reveal for my novel #DontLetTheDarknessEatYouUp

Pre-Orders 10.01.25
Releases 10.30.25

Nothing Feels Better Than
Blood on Blood

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H. Perry Horton @hperryhorton.bsky.social · 1h

When all else fails, watch a Paul Newman movie.

a man wearing a white shirt and black tie is standing in a room .

ALT: a man wearing a white shirt and black tie is standing in a room .

media.tenor.com

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H. Perry Horton @hperryhorton.bsky.social · 2h

Okay so don't hate me but im a born & raised Yankees fan from rural NC (blame my dad but take a number) and Don Mattingly was my First and Only Eternal Hero, but i just realized he's on Toronto's coaching staff ...... thoughts and prayers please.

#mlbplayoffs

mattingly for the last time get rid of those sideburns!

ALT: mattingly for the last time get rid of those sideburns!

media.tenor.com

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H. Perry Horton @hperryhorton.bsky.social · 5h

I am literally in a store in Portland right now.

Aaron Rupar @atrupar.com · 7h

Trump: "I don't know what could be worse than Portland. You don't even have stores anymore. They don't even put glass up. They put plywood on their windows."

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H. Perry Horton @hperryhorton.bsky.social · 7h

This dumb motherfucker couldn't find Portland on a map of Portland.

H. Perry Horton @hperryhorton.bsky.social · 7h

"We took the freedom of speech away" is the only part of this sentence that matters. Anything after it is inconsequential.

Aaron Rupar @atrupar.com · 8h

Trump: "We took the freedom of speech away because that's been through the courts and the courts said you have freedom of speech, but what has happened is when they burn a flag it agitates and irritates crowds."

H. Perry Horton @hperryhorton.bsky.social · 13h

Where oh where were the bullies in this feeb's town when he was growing up?

Aaron Rupar @atrupar.com · 13h

Q: A lot of the free healthcare for illegal aliens you've been talking about is care provided in ERs, which are required by federal law to care for everybody. Should that law be changed?

MIKE JOHNSON: No. You're cherrypicking a tiny subset of the issues.

H. Perry Horton @hperryhorton.bsky.social · 13h

This fake-ass human uses religion like a badge. Even Jesus would be repulsed.

PatriotTakes 🇺🇸 @patriottakes.bsky.social · 1d

Kristi Noem praying before sending her secret, masked goons out to harass the people of Portland

H. Perry Horton @hperryhorton.bsky.social · 1d

My hill-to-die-on unpopular movie opinion is that THE NEON DEMON is late-90s-Lynch-level good.

a close up of a woman 's face with a blue dress on

ALT: a close up of a woman 's face with a blue dress on

media.tenor.com

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H. Perry Horton @hperryhorton.bsky.social · 1d

Holy shit y'all, millennials just discovered that Eilzabeth Taylor was both incredibly hot and legendarily talented. Brace yourselves.

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Reposted by H. Perry Horton

Ron Filipkowski @ronfilipkowski.bsky.social · 1d

Update from the war zone in Portland.

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H. Perry Horton @hperryhorton.bsky.social · 1d

If something happens to Dolly Parton i swear to god im not gonna be okay.

Reposted by H. Perry Horton

southpaw @nycsouthpaw.bsky.social · 1d

I’m a career prosecutor who took a $25,000 check from an affiliated entity of Donald Trump’s while investigating Trump University and later left my lobbying firm to become Donald Trump’s personal impeachment lawyer, White House aide, and Attorney General. So don’t you DARE question my integrity.

Aaron Rupar @atrupar.com · 1d

Bondi to Blumenthal: "You lied. How dare you? I'm a career prosecutor. Don't you ever challenge my integrity. Do not question my ability to be fair and impartial."

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H. Perry Horton @hperryhorton.bsky.social · 1d

(tapping the screen 👇)

H. Perry Horton @hperryhorton.bsky.social · 1d

Pretty sure Artic Frost is a Gushers flavor, Chuckie.

Aaron Rupar @atrupar.com · 1d

Rep. Chuck Grassley tells Bondi "Arctic Frost" (whatever that is) was "worse than Watergate"

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H. Perry Horton @hperryhorton.bsky.social · 1d

Oh fuck off Sean.

Aaron Rupar @atrupar.com · 1d

Sean Duffy on marijuana: "To legalize it and to say, 'it's okay for our kids and our young people to smoke it, and it's good for them,' and then they get behind cars -- it's dangerous and it's taking lives ... this is way more dangerous stuff. And then they're lacing it with other materials."

H. Perry Horton @hperryhorton.bsky.social · 2d

Why is this headline with this picture?

The Guardian @theguardian.com · 2d

Bad movies: is Ridley Scott right to say that 60% of films stink?

Napoleon director Ridley Scott has declared the history of film to be overwhelmingly rubbish – with a few notable exceptions

www.theguardian.com

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Reposted by H. Perry Horton

Andy @andyoregon.bsky.social · 2d

Jess Waters recycling the same guy over and over to represent “former” different enemies

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Reposted by H. Perry Horton

George Conway 👊🇺🇸🔥 @gtconway.bsky.social · 2d

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H. Perry Horton @hperryhorton.bsky.social · 2d

Welcome to the rest of your life.

Blue Georgia @bluegeorgia.bsky.social · 2d

Stephen Miller: "Eventually elections don’t carry the day because violence beats votes… When we see a muscular response from the federal government, it’s because we’re not going to let violence beat votes."

Is he implying federal intervention determines political legitimacy, not ballots or courts?

H. Perry Horton @hperryhorton.bsky.social · 2d

Jason Bateman is the most validating comeback in mediocre-white-guy history, and I love him.

a man in a pink sweater says " i don 't win a lot "

ALT: a man in a pink sweater says " i don 't win a lot "

media.tenor.com

H. Perry Horton @hperryhorton.bsky.social · 2d

Castellano's fuckin safe.

H. Perry Horton @hperryhorton.bsky.social · 2d

I just dropped a full pint of beer in the glass in the bar laughing at this and it was fucking worth it.

Jason Bailey @jasondashbailey.com · 2d

Actual lol at this quote from Riyadh Comedy Festival participant Whitney Cummings
(source: archive.is/202311151840...)

Whitney Cummings likes to think of herself as a comedy “martyr,” one of many modern comedians who are willing to “sacrifice themselves just to make sure the First Amendment is still intact.”

Reposted by H. Perry Horton

Aaron Rupar @atrupar.com · 2d

Trump: "Portland is on fire. Portland's been on fire for years. And not so much saving it -- we have to save something else. Because I think that's all insurrection, criminal insurrection."

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H. Perry Horton @hperryhorton.bsky.social · 2d

He has the nuclear codes.

Aaron Rupar @atrupar.com · 2d

Trump on AI: "In terms of medical, in terms of medical costs, in terms of knowledge, it's basically information. And information at a level that nobody thought possible before. So we'll see."

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Reposted by H. Perry Horton

Julian Sanchez @normative.bsky.social · 2d

Yes, when I want to know what the Black community in Chicago is thinking, I always turn to someone who's really got their finger on the pulse: Stephen Miller.

Aaron Rupar @atrupar.com · 2d

Stephen Miller: "The Black people in Chicago are thrilled that we're getting the illegal aliens out of their communities who are stealing their housing, jobs, and resources."

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