Eh, as long as some folks were helped (even if placebo effect) I’ll call it a preemptive net positive.

Ah, I could see that being a clever treatment! Like bitter nail polish for nail biters. How did the tests go?

Kudzu is a demon plant. People talk about mint being the botanical devil, but mint would WITHER under an opaque umbrella of kudzu.

So now I learn it also has intoxicating effects. OF COURSE YOU DO, DEVIL PLANT.

Ben why do you hate fun. Why do you hate joy. Why do you hate your spouse????

Conversely, we also received Colonel Brandan, the best of men.

Honestly I would have loved a My Cousin Vinny sequel where he actually attends law school, à la Legally Blonde. Also Mona Lisa finally has a baby.

WILL I HAVE TIME TO WASH THE FUNERAL DRESS BEFOE HAVING TO WEAR IT AGAIN? NEWS AT ELEVEN.

I blame this on my sister in law. I literally texted her before I left to ask how realistically close she was to death (had been on hospice) because I REALLY needed it to not be this specific week. I was assured she was stable enough. LIES.

We’ll hear him in the sink licking dishes, and he doesn’t react to us stomping up behind him until he’s actively being thwacked with a magazine! And then he’s so surprised like “how did you FIND ME????”

Fortunately he’s been on permanent house arrest his whole life.

I ALWAYS KNEW HE WAS SPECIAL NEEDS.

He sleeps so soundly you can only wake him up by shaking him, he “gets lost” in the house multiple times a day (as if he can’t hear us), when he gets lost he screams so loud I’m not sure he can hear himself, and he doesn’t react when we shake a treat bag OR hiss at him unless he can see it happen.