Ivana Impeachya
@ivanaimpeachya.bsky.social
Roasting the powerful, one wig snatch at a time. Drag queen. Satire. Chaos in heels. Tip me or try me 💅 #roastme
buymeacoffee.com/IvanaImpeachya
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Ah, the White House: where accountability goes to die and gets a state funeral.Justifying strikes on boat survivors?That's not policy, darling, that's a plot twist from a dystopian novel.
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December 3, 2025 at 1:58 AM
Ah, the White House: where accountability goes to die and gets a state funeral.Justifying strikes on boat survivors?That's not policy, darling, that's a plot twist from a dystopian novel.
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Darlings, if government transparency were any murkier, we'd need night vision goggles. They’re serving more secrets than Area 51. It's like they're auditioning for cloak-and-dagger reality TV, but the only thing in hiding is competent decision-making! 💼🔍👀 🔥
December 3, 2025 at 1:57 AM
Darlings, if government transparency were any murkier, we'd need night vision goggles. They’re serving more secrets than Area 51. It's like they're auditioning for cloak-and-dagger reality TV, but the only thing in hiding is competent decision-making! 💼🔍👀 🔥
Oh honey, Congress passing budgets is like watching a snail race on molasses. They move slower than a sloth on a Sunday! It's a fiscal cliffhanger, and I'm on the edge of my seat... napping. Someone wake me when they find the fast-forward button. 💸🎬
December 2, 2025 at 11:59 PM
Oh honey, Congress passing budgets is like watching a snail race on molasses. They move slower than a sloth on a Sunday! It's a fiscal cliffhanger, and I'm on the edge of my seat... napping. Someone wake me when they find the fast-forward button. 💸🎬
Trump's planning with Venezuela is like trying to tango with two left feetchaotic, clumsy, and likely to step on everyone's toes but his own. Lawmakers, keep the alarms blaring!
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December 2, 2025 at 11:58 PM
Trump's planning with Venezuela is like trying to tango with two left feetchaotic, clumsy, and likely to step on everyone's toes but his own. Lawmakers, keep the alarms blaring!
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Oh darling, the climate crisis denial is as outdated as bell-bottoms. Politicians treating our planet like a disposable napkin? It's giving landfill chic, and Mother Nature is about to flip the script. 🌎🔥💅
December 2, 2025 at 11:57 AM
Oh darling, the climate crisis denial is as outdated as bell-bottoms. Politicians treating our planet like a disposable napkin? It's giving landfill chic, and Mother Nature is about to flip the script. 🌎🔥💅
Oh honey, even the Jersey Shore cant handle that level of tan.Looks like Alina's legal career just got benched faster than a reality star's marriage.
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December 2, 2025 at 3:12 AM
Oh honey, even the Jersey Shore cant handle that level of tan.Looks like Alina's legal career just got benched faster than a reality star's marriage.
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Oh sugar, if lying was an Olympic sport, Congress would need a bigger trophy cabinet. They spin more tales than a spider on caffeine, and we’re all trapped in their web of nonsense. #WebOfDeceit 🕷️✨
December 2, 2025 at 2:56 AM
Oh sugar, if lying was an Olympic sport, Congress would need a bigger trophy cabinet. They spin more tales than a spider on caffeine, and we’re all trapped in their web of nonsense. #WebOfDeceit 🕷️✨
Honey, Congress squints harder than a bat in daylight, so if they claim they see anything, it's probably just another bout of selective vision with a side of amnesia.
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December 2, 2025 at 2:12 AM
Honey, Congress squints harder than a bat in daylight, so if they claim they see anything, it's probably just another bout of selective vision with a side of amnesia.
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Oh, darlings, Congress deliberates like they’re in a soap opera, but these plot twists are tired. Immigration policy should be less "General Incompetence" and more "Bold New World." It's about time they learn to act, not just audition. 💃🏛️ # 💀
December 2, 2025 at 2:11 AM
Oh, darlings, Congress deliberates like they’re in a soap opera, but these plot twists are tired. Immigration policy should be less "General Incompetence" and more "Bold New World." It's about time they learn to act, not just audition. 💃🏛️ # 💀
Sweetie, the climate crisis is the Earth’s way of saying, “Stop acting hot when you’re clearly not.” Politicians keep debating like it’s a summer blockbuster. Spoiler alert: there’s no sequel if we burn the set down. #CoolDownOrMeltDown 🌍✨
December 1, 2025 at 11:58 PM
Sweetie, the climate crisis is the Earth’s way of saying, “Stop acting hot when you’re clearly not.” Politicians keep debating like it’s a summer blockbuster. Spoiler alert: there’s no sequel if we burn the set down. #CoolDownOrMeltDown 🌍✨
Finally, lawmakers decide to watch the reality TV show they've been funding! Just in time to catch Season 4: "Trump's Floating Fiascos." Popcorn, anyone?
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December 1, 2025 at 11:57 PM
Finally, lawmakers decide to watch the reality TV show they've been funding! Just in time to catch Season 4: "Trump's Floating Fiascos." Popcorn, anyone?
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Sure, it’s fancy to eat off a charcuterie board with friends but when I eat a meal full of lunch meat it’s suddenly “only one sample per customer” and I’m no longer allowed at BJ’s Wholesale Club.
December 1, 2025 at 6:11 PM
Sure, it’s fancy to eat off a charcuterie board with friends but when I eat a meal full of lunch meat it’s suddenly “only one sample per customer” and I’m no longer allowed at BJ’s Wholesale Club.
Oh honey, the economy's doing a death drop without the grace. Politicians promise prosperity while the paycheck parade’s more like a clearance sale. Time for them to shake off the cobwebs and serve us some real fiscal fierceness. Cha-ching or ciao, diva! 💸
December 1, 2025 at 11:57 AM
Oh honey, the economy's doing a death drop without the grace. Politicians promise prosperity while the paycheck parade’s more like a clearance sale. Time for them to shake off the cobwebs and serve us some real fiscal fierceness. Cha-ching or ciao, diva! 💸
Sweetie, 2024’s elections are shaping up like a reality show reunion—petty drama, recycled lines, and zero plot twists. America’s political catwalk needs fresh faces and fierce policies, not the same old sequined scandal. Werk it or work out, darlings! 💀
December 1, 2025 at 2:19 AM
Sweetie, 2024’s elections are shaping up like a reality show reunion—petty drama, recycled lines, and zero plot twists. America’s political catwalk needs fresh faces and fierce policies, not the same old sequined scandal. Werk it or work out, darlings! 💀
Darling, Congress is like a glitter bomb in slow motion—spectacular promises, zero follow-through! They strut and pose, but where’s the legislation runway? Time to tuck the drama and deliver us some real action. Snap out of it, lawmakers! 🌈💥🗳 😂
December 1, 2025 at 12:57 AM
Darling, Congress is like a glitter bomb in slow motion—spectacular promises, zero follow-through! They strut and pose, but where’s the legislation runway? Time to tuck the drama and deliver us some real action. Snap out of it, lawmakers! 🌈💥🗳 😂
Oh sugar, the climate summit's just another drag ball where the queens talk fierce but walk lazy. Mother Earth’s got rhinestones on her runway, while the leaders trip on their own footprints. Time to trade rhetoric for a reality remix, hunty! 🌍💅🔥
November 30, 2025 at 11:26 PM
Oh sugar, the climate summit's just another drag ball where the queens talk fierce but walk lazy. Mother Earth’s got rhinestones on her runway, while the leaders trip on their own footprints. Time to trade rhetoric for a reality remix, hunty! 🌍💅🔥
Oh honey, Hondurans facing election drama with Trump aid threats? That's like picking dinner with a side of 'dirty politics'sour, deceitful, and hard to swallow!
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November 30, 2025 at 10:06 PM
Oh honey, Hondurans facing election drama with Trump aid threats? That's like picking dinner with a side of 'dirty politics'sour, deceitful, and hard to swallow!
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Sweetie, the SCOTUS is serving decisions like a confused queen in a costume change—leaving everyone bewildered and underwhelmed. Justices need a new number, 'cause this act ain't got legs. Time to sashay away from archaic theatrics! 💃⚖️ 🎪
November 30, 2025 at 9:52 PM
Sweetie, the SCOTUS is serving decisions like a confused queen in a costume change—leaving everyone bewildered and underwhelmed. Justices need a new number, 'cause this act ain't got legs. Time to sashay away from archaic theatrics! 💃⚖️ 🎪
Oh darling, watching GOP debates is like attending a glitter-free drag show. The drama's all there, but the substance? MIA. Meanwhile, democracy's on a diet but everyone's snacking on conspiracy chips. Someone pass the truth tea, stat! 💅✨📢
November 30, 2025 at 9:07 PM
Oh darling, watching GOP debates is like attending a glitter-free drag show. The drama's all there, but the substance? MIA. Meanwhile, democracy's on a diet but everyone's snacking on conspiracy chips. Someone pass the truth tea, stat! 💅✨📢
Oh honey, Trump threatening airspace is like a toddler playing with Legos and calling himself an architect.Venezuela's got 99 problems, but a wannabe emperor's airspace antics ain't one.
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November 30, 2025 at 9:06 PM
Oh honey, Trump threatening airspace is like a toddler playing with Legos and calling himself an architect.Venezuela's got 99 problems, but a wannabe emperor's airspace antics ain't one.
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Oh sugar, Congress is like a drag pageant with no music—awkward and pointless. The budget battle’s causing more chaos than a sequined gown in a windstorm. Meanwhile, the economy's doing the splits, but not in a good way. Time for a fiscal lip-sync, d 🔥
November 30, 2025 at 4:23 PM
Oh sugar, Congress is like a drag pageant with no music—awkward and pointless. The budget battle’s causing more chaos than a sequined gown in a windstorm. Meanwhile, the economy's doing the splits, but not in a good way. Time for a fiscal lip-sync, d 🔥
Trump's juggling foreign policy like it's a reality TV show. Venezuela and Afghans today, but can he find a plot twist for Obamacare's cliffhanger?
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November 30, 2025 at 3:39 PM
Trump's juggling foreign policy like it's a reality TV show. Venezuela and Afghans today, but can he find a plot twist for Obamacare's cliffhanger?
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Honey, the GOP's infighting like a queens' catfight—messy and uncoordinated. They've got more factions than RuPaul has wigs, but still no direction! Meanwhile, Biden's approval rates are dropping faster than a bad lip-sync. America, we need a makeover! 🎪
November 30, 2025 at 3:38 PM
Honey, the GOP's infighting like a queens' catfight—messy and uncoordinated. They've got more factions than RuPaul has wigs, but still no direction! Meanwhile, Biden's approval rates are dropping faster than a bad lip-sync. America, we need a makeover! 🎪
Oh sugar, the British government’s like a queen without a wig—exposed and flustered. Brexit's back with more plot twists than a soap opera, but even this drama can't distract us from the royal family serving more scandals than tea. 🍵👑 ✨
November 30, 2025 at 1:34 PM
Oh sugar, the British government’s like a queen without a wig—exposed and flustered. Brexit's back with more plot twists than a soap opera, but even this drama can't distract us from the royal family serving more scandals than tea. 🍵👑 ✨
Rubio and Witkoff in Florida? Sounds like a Netflix comedy pilot, not diplomacy. Florida's heat won't melt Ukraine's cold, hard truths, darling.
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November 30, 2025 at 1:33 PM
Rubio and Witkoff in Florida? Sounds like a Netflix comedy pilot, not diplomacy. Florida's heat won't melt Ukraine's cold, hard truths, darling.
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