jackson henry
@jasonemry.bsky.social
my high bowling score is 300 so my opinions pack a certain gravitas
let’s do slow, but with straps
February 12, 2026 at 1:32 AM
let’s do slow, but with straps
Chinese Spy Balloon 2: Globo de Fiesta
February 11, 2026 at 6:13 PM
Chinese Spy Balloon 2: Globo de Fiesta
how long before someone accidentally plays porn on one of those things
February 11, 2026 at 4:26 PM
how long before someone accidentally plays porn on one of those things
"All I did was shit on everybody, steal from cancer babies, and burn the planet for money. Why all the hate?"
February 11, 2026 at 4:15 PM
"All I did was shit on everybody, steal from cancer babies, and burn the planet for money. Why all the hate?"
I got fucked over by a carton of strawberries like this once
fucking unicorn berries
fucking unicorn berries
February 11, 2026 at 6:21 AM
I got fucked over by a carton of strawberries like this once
fucking unicorn berries
fucking unicorn berries
"You have to understand, we're abducting people who have jobs, so there will be fewer people with jobs. It's very complicated."
February 10, 2026 at 7:52 PM
"You have to understand, we're abducting people who have jobs, so there will be fewer people with jobs. It's very complicated."
may I suggest shitting himself to death? I hear it's lovely around this time
February 10, 2026 at 7:41 PM
may I suggest shitting himself to death? I hear it's lovely around this time
"No but you see your honor we were really really nice."
-child abductors
-child abductors
February 10, 2026 at 7:40 PM
"No but you see your honor we were really really nice."
-child abductors
-child abductors
Mike "The Constitu-what?" Johnson
February 10, 2026 at 4:15 PM
Mike "The Constitu-what?" Johnson
"As well as a few prostitute children"?
February 10, 2026 at 4:00 PM
"As well as a few prostitute children"?
would human centipedes be in the paralympics, or no?
February 10, 2026 at 5:44 AM
would human centipedes be in the paralympics, or no?
no matter how many gold medals you get you're still a luger
February 10, 2026 at 5:29 AM
no matter how many gold medals you get you're still a luger
human sacrifice w/no god hell yeah
February 9, 2026 at 8:41 PM
human sacrifice w/no god hell yeah
"The mission at SpaceX remains the same: Get huge drug-addled mind boners and never cum. Edgelord 4 lyfe."
February 9, 2026 at 5:31 PM
"The mission at SpaceX remains the same: Get huge drug-addled mind boners and never cum. Edgelord 4 lyfe."
you were my kid rock in the storm
February 9, 2026 at 5:08 PM
you were my kid rock in the storm
suspecting anyone speaking another language is talking about your tiny dick is alpha af bro what if they are and you don't
February 9, 2026 at 6:31 AM
suspecting anyone speaking another language is talking about your tiny dick is alpha af bro what if they are and you don't
WHEN WILL WHITE PEOPLE FINALLY GET A CHANCE IN AMERICA
February 9, 2026 at 5:28 AM
WHEN WILL WHITE PEOPLE FINALLY GET A CHANCE IN AMERICA
“THIS THING THAT IS SO GREAT AND INDESTRUCTIBLE HAS BEEN DESTROYED BY *checks notes* SINGING AND DANCING.”
February 9, 2026 at 2:18 AM
“THIS THING THAT IS SO GREAT AND INDESTRUCTIBLE HAS BEEN DESTROYED BY *checks notes* SINGING AND DANCING.”
democrats did this
February 8, 2026 at 11:52 PM
democrats did this
me: think of a billionaire like a big dick anal queen, but for money. she spent her whooooooole life needing bigger and bigger dicks to fill her hole, and now, she can't feel anything *making eye contact with kindergarten teacher*
February 8, 2026 at 5:12 PM
me: think of a billionaire like a big dick anal queen, but for money. she spent her whooooooole life needing bigger and bigger dicks to fill her hole, and now, she can't feel anything *making eye contact with kindergarten teacher*