Jonathan Emmett
@jonathanemmett.com
📚 Children’s author and paper engineer.
🕸️ Website & Blog: jonathanemmett.com
🌱 Green. Humanist. Tabletop gamer.
🇬🇧 Living in Nottingham, UK.
🌍 Dismayed by our generation’s indifference to climate breakdown.
🕸️ Website & Blog: jonathanemmett.com
🌱 Green. Humanist. Tabletop gamer.
🇬🇧 Living in Nottingham, UK.
🌍 Dismayed by our generation’s indifference to climate breakdown.
Weir all going on a winter holiday!
January 6, 2026 at 4:08 PM
Weir all going on a winter holiday!
I've just managed to finish reading this gripping, dripping middle grade folk horror by #NottsKidLit author @darrensimpson44.bsky.social before the year was out!
Like THE WICKER MAN meets SWAMP THING, I would not recommend reading it in the bath.
Like THE WICKER MAN meets SWAMP THING, I would not recommend reading it in the bath.
December 31, 2025 at 4:59 PM
I've just managed to finish reading this gripping, dripping middle grade folk horror by #NottsKidLit author @darrensimpson44.bsky.social before the year was out!
Like THE WICKER MAN meets SWAMP THING, I would not recommend reading it in the bath.
Like THE WICKER MAN meets SWAMP THING, I would not recommend reading it in the bath.
Bradley’s #BadventCalendar Day 25
Things didn't go at all as I planned last night.
Want to know what happened? Well, you'll have to read that stupid book THE SANTA TRAP by those scoundrels Jonathan Emmett and Poly Bernatene. 📕
Things didn't go at all as I planned last night.
Want to know what happened? Well, you'll have to read that stupid book THE SANTA TRAP by those scoundrels Jonathan Emmett and Poly Bernatene. 📕
December 25, 2025 at 8:26 AM
Bradley’s #BadventCalendar Day 25
Things didn't go at all as I planned last night.
Want to know what happened? Well, you'll have to read that stupid book THE SANTA TRAP by those scoundrels Jonathan Emmett and Poly Bernatene. 📕
Things didn't go at all as I planned last night.
Want to know what happened? Well, you'll have to read that stupid book THE SANTA TRAP by those scoundrels Jonathan Emmett and Poly Bernatene. 📕
Bradley’s #BadventCalendar Day 24
I hung a cage above the fireplace to make sure I catch the fat fool.
All the traps are now set. I just have time for a quick nap … 💤
I hung a cage above the fireplace to make sure I catch the fat fool.
All the traps are now set. I just have time for a quick nap … 💤
December 24, 2025 at 8:40 AM
Bradley’s #BadventCalendar Day 24
I hung a cage above the fireplace to make sure I catch the fat fool.
All the traps are now set. I just have time for a quick nap … 💤
I hung a cage above the fireplace to make sure I catch the fat fool.
All the traps are now set. I just have time for a quick nap … 💤
Bradley’s #BadventCalendar Day 23
I spent the day checking the dynamite fuses, sharpening the guillotine blades, oiling the trapdoor hinges ... but I didn't feed the tigers. I want them to be HUNGRY! 🐅🐅🐅
I spent the day checking the dynamite fuses, sharpening the guillotine blades, oiling the trapdoor hinges ... but I didn't feed the tigers. I want them to be HUNGRY! 🐅🐅🐅
December 23, 2025 at 9:44 AM
Bradley’s #BadventCalendar Day 23
I spent the day checking the dynamite fuses, sharpening the guillotine blades, oiling the trapdoor hinges ... but I didn't feed the tigers. I want them to be HUNGRY! 🐅🐅🐅
I spent the day checking the dynamite fuses, sharpening the guillotine blades, oiling the trapdoor hinges ... but I didn't feed the tigers. I want them to be HUNGRY! 🐅🐅🐅
This year's Emmett Family Christmas card.
Happy Fishmas to those that celebrate it!
"Cod bless us, every one!"
#ChristmasCards #AChristmasCarol #NoAI
Happy Fishmas to those that celebrate it!
"Cod bless us, every one!"
#ChristmasCards #AChristmasCarol #NoAI
December 22, 2025 at 12:43 PM
This year's Emmett Family Christmas card.
Happy Fishmas to those that celebrate it!
"Cod bless us, every one!"
#ChristmasCards #AChristmasCarol #NoAI
Happy Fishmas to those that celebrate it!
"Cod bless us, every one!"
#ChristmasCards #AChristmasCarol #NoAI
Bradley’s #BadventCalendar Day 22
My parents came to visit me, but they didn't stay long. Mum is allergic to cats and Dad is allergic to deadly explosions. 🤧
My parents came to visit me, but they didn't stay long. Mum is allergic to cats and Dad is allergic to deadly explosions. 🤧
December 22, 2025 at 9:52 AM
Bradley’s #BadventCalendar Day 22
My parents came to visit me, but they didn't stay long. Mum is allergic to cats and Dad is allergic to deadly explosions. 🤧
My parents came to visit me, but they didn't stay long. Mum is allergic to cats and Dad is allergic to deadly explosions. 🤧
Bradley’s #BadventCalendar Day 21
It looks like the elephant is sneaking in through the hole it made when it charged through the dining room wall. I never go there as I prefer to eat in the toilet. I'll brick it up later. 🐘
It looks like the elephant is sneaking in through the hole it made when it charged through the dining room wall. I never go there as I prefer to eat in the toilet. I'll brick it up later. 🐘
December 21, 2025 at 10:49 AM
Bradley’s #BadventCalendar Day 21
It looks like the elephant is sneaking in through the hole it made when it charged through the dining room wall. I never go there as I prefer to eat in the toilet. I'll brick it up later. 🐘
It looks like the elephant is sneaking in through the hole it made when it charged through the dining room wall. I never go there as I prefer to eat in the toilet. I'll brick it up later. 🐘
Bradley’s #BadventCalendar Day 20
I found elephant poop in the hallway again. How did he get in? I boarded up the Elephant flap! He’ll get what he deserves when I catch him.
I found elephant poop in the hallway again. How did he get in? I boarded up the Elephant flap! He’ll get what he deserves when I catch him.
December 21, 2025 at 10:44 AM
Bradley’s #BadventCalendar Day 20
I found elephant poop in the hallway again. How did he get in? I boarded up the Elephant flap! He’ll get what he deserves when I catch him.
I found elephant poop in the hallway again. How did he get in? I boarded up the Elephant flap! He’ll get what he deserves when I catch him.
Bradley’s #BadventCalendar Day 19
The man from the zoo and the nosy neighbour are singing cheery Christmas carols!
I threatened to stop feeding them unless they start acting like real prisoners. 🎶
The man from the zoo and the nosy neighbour are singing cheery Christmas carols!
I threatened to stop feeding them unless they start acting like real prisoners. 🎶
December 19, 2025 at 9:22 AM
Bradley’s #BadventCalendar Day 19
The man from the zoo and the nosy neighbour are singing cheery Christmas carols!
I threatened to stop feeding them unless they start acting like real prisoners. 🎶
The man from the zoo and the nosy neighbour are singing cheery Christmas carols!
I threatened to stop feeding them unless they start acting like real prisoners. 🎶
Just realised you can't really tell how big the decorations are from the original photos. Here's the miniature version of #ChristmasStreetBook.
#KidLitUK #BookSky #KidLit
#ChristmasBooks #ChristmasBooksForKids
#KidLitUK #BookSky #KidLit
#ChristmasBooks #ChristmasBooksForKids
December 18, 2025 at 2:11 PM
Just realised you can't really tell how big the decorations are from the original photos. Here's the miniature version of #ChristmasStreetBook.
#KidLitUK #BookSky #KidLit
#ChristmasBooks #ChristmasBooksForKids
#KidLitUK #BookSky #KidLit
#ChristmasBooks #ChristmasBooksForKids
I've stopped doing #PopUpOfTheWeek, but as it's nearly Christmas, here's what you see when you look through the postbox of the concertina peepshow that comes with THE JOLLY CHRISTMAS POSTMAN by Janet and Allan Ahlberg.
#KidLitUK #ChristmasBooks #BookSky
#KidLitUK #ChristmasBooks #BookSky
December 18, 2025 at 1:18 PM
I've stopped doing #PopUpOfTheWeek, but as it's nearly Christmas, here's what you see when you look through the postbox of the concertina peepshow that comes with THE JOLLY CHRISTMAS POSTMAN by Janet and Allan Ahlberg.
#KidLitUK #ChristmasBooks #BookSky
#KidLitUK #ChristmasBooks #BookSky
I scanned the covers of our family’s favourite Christmas reads – plus a few of my own festive books – to make miniature book tree decorations.
📚🎄✂️
#KidLitUK #BookSky #KidLit
#ChristmasBooks #ChristmasBooksForKids
📚🎄✂️
#KidLitUK #BookSky #KidLit
#ChristmasBooks #ChristmasBooksForKids
December 18, 2025 at 12:33 PM
I scanned the covers of our family’s favourite Christmas reads – plus a few of my own festive books – to make miniature book tree decorations.
📚🎄✂️
#KidLitUK #BookSky #KidLit
#ChristmasBooks #ChristmasBooksForKids
📚🎄✂️
#KidLitUK #BookSky #KidLit
#ChristmasBooks #ChristmasBooksForKids
Our local phantom yarn bomber has struck again.
December 18, 2025 at 11:53 AM
Our local phantom yarn bomber has struck again.
Bradley’s #BadventCalendar Day 18
I’ve just read that Dickens novel A CHRISTMAS CAROL. The hero's name is Ebenezer, not Carol?!
He’s really cool at the start of the book, but the ending is rubbish! 📖
I’ve just read that Dickens novel A CHRISTMAS CAROL. The hero's name is Ebenezer, not Carol?!
He’s really cool at the start of the book, but the ending is rubbish! 📖
December 18, 2025 at 9:45 AM
Bradley’s #BadventCalendar Day 18
I’ve just read that Dickens novel A CHRISTMAS CAROL. The hero's name is Ebenezer, not Carol?!
He’s really cool at the start of the book, but the ending is rubbish! 📖
I’ve just read that Dickens novel A CHRISTMAS CAROL. The hero's name is Ebenezer, not Carol?!
He’s really cool at the start of the book, but the ending is rubbish! 📖
It's the time of year when, taking inspiration from #TheSantaTrap, schools are sending me instructions children have written for building their own Santa traps.
Bradley's parents may be "immensely rich", but I think even he would struggle to get hold of 200,000 dinosaurs.
🦖🦕🦖🦕🦖🦕🦖🦕🦖🦕🦖🦕🦖🦕🦖🦕🦖🦕🦖🦕🦖🦕🦖🦕
Bradley's parents may be "immensely rich", but I think even he would struggle to get hold of 200,000 dinosaurs.
🦖🦕🦖🦕🦖🦕🦖🦕🦖🦕🦖🦕🦖🦕🦖🦕🦖🦕🦖🦕🦖🦕🦖🦕
December 17, 2025 at 7:46 PM
It's the time of year when, taking inspiration from #TheSantaTrap, schools are sending me instructions children have written for building their own Santa traps.
Bradley's parents may be "immensely rich", but I think even he would struggle to get hold of 200,000 dinosaurs.
🦖🦕🦖🦕🦖🦕🦖🦕🦖🦕🦖🦕🦖🦕🦖🦕🦖🦕🦖🦕🦖🦕🦖🦕
Bradley's parents may be "immensely rich", but I think even he would struggle to get hold of 200,000 dinosaurs.
🦖🦕🦖🦕🦖🦕🦖🦕🦖🦕🦖🦕🦖🦕🦖🦕🦖🦕🦖🦕🦖🦕🦖🦕
This comic strip of facts and fallacies of children's picture books by the great Posy Simmonds is more than 20 years old, but much of it still rings true.
… except the bit about a bear in a pinny attending editorial meetings – it's more likely to be a unicorn these days.
#KidLitUK #BookSky #KidLit
… except the bit about a bear in a pinny attending editorial meetings – it's more likely to be a unicorn these days.
#KidLitUK #BookSky #KidLit
December 17, 2025 at 5:02 PM
🎅🏼 I've seen people using CHRISTMAS STREET as a decoration, so I thought I'd do it myself this year. 😊
Order the book from your local bookshop or from @bookshop-org-uk.bsky.social on this link:
🇬🇧 uk.bookshop.org/a/16211/9781...
Illustrated by Ingela P Arrhenius
Published by @nosycrow.bsky.social
Order the book from your local bookshop or from @bookshop-org-uk.bsky.social on this link:
🇬🇧 uk.bookshop.org/a/16211/9781...
Illustrated by Ingela P Arrhenius
Published by @nosycrow.bsky.social
December 17, 2025 at 11:38 AM
🎅🏼 I've seen people using CHRISTMAS STREET as a decoration, so I thought I'd do it myself this year. 😊
Order the book from your local bookshop or from @bookshop-org-uk.bsky.social on this link:
🇬🇧 uk.bookshop.org/a/16211/9781...
Illustrated by Ingela P Arrhenius
Published by @nosycrow.bsky.social
Order the book from your local bookshop or from @bookshop-org-uk.bsky.social on this link:
🇬🇧 uk.bookshop.org/a/16211/9781...
Illustrated by Ingela P Arrhenius
Published by @nosycrow.bsky.social
Bradley’s #BadventCalendar Day 17
I finished the trap door next to the front door this morning, and you can hardly see the join. I could easily forget it was there!
I finished the trap door next to the front door this morning, and you can hardly see the join. I could easily forget it was there!
December 17, 2025 at 9:13 AM
Bradley’s #BadventCalendar Day 17
I finished the trap door next to the front door this morning, and you can hardly see the join. I could easily forget it was there!
I finished the trap door next to the front door this morning, and you can hardly see the join. I could easily forget it was there!
Bradley’s #BadventCalendar Day 16
I just bought this 'BoneMangler™ Mantrap' online to put under the tree. I hope Santa puts his foot in it! 🦶🏻
I just bought this 'BoneMangler™ Mantrap' online to put under the tree. I hope Santa puts his foot in it! 🦶🏻
December 16, 2025 at 9:54 AM
Bradley’s #BadventCalendar Day 16
I just bought this 'BoneMangler™ Mantrap' online to put under the tree. I hope Santa puts his foot in it! 🦶🏻
I just bought this 'BoneMangler™ Mantrap' online to put under the tree. I hope Santa puts his foot in it! 🦶🏻
Bradley’s #BadventCalendar Day 15
A nosy neighbour came round to ask if I had a licence for all the dynamite. I’ve locked her in the basement with the man from the zoo. 🧨
A nosy neighbour came round to ask if I had a licence for all the dynamite. I’ve locked her in the basement with the man from the zoo. 🧨
December 15, 2025 at 10:46 AM
Bradley’s #BadventCalendar Day 15
A nosy neighbour came round to ask if I had a licence for all the dynamite. I’ve locked her in the basement with the man from the zoo. 🧨
A nosy neighbour came round to ask if I had a licence for all the dynamite. I’ve locked her in the basement with the man from the zoo. 🧨
Yesterday was a dark day for the BBC.
The words, 'If liberty means anything at all, it means the right to tell people what they do not want to hear,' are carved in stone on the wall of the BBC's headquarters.
It's sad that the company's current management are not willing to uphold this principle.
The words, 'If liberty means anything at all, it means the right to tell people what they do not want to hear,' are carved in stone on the wall of the BBC's headquarters.
It's sad that the company's current management are not willing to uphold this principle.
December 14, 2025 at 11:44 AM
Yesterday was a dark day for the BBC.
The words, 'If liberty means anything at all, it means the right to tell people what they do not want to hear,' are carved in stone on the wall of the BBC's headquarters.
It's sad that the company's current management are not willing to uphold this principle.
The words, 'If liberty means anything at all, it means the right to tell people what they do not want to hear,' are carved in stone on the wall of the BBC's headquarters.
It's sad that the company's current management are not willing to uphold this principle.
Bradley’s #BadventCalendar Day 14
Pesky carol singers wouldn't leave ... so I let the tigers loose on them.
There was a not-so-SILENT NIGHT with lots of shreiking and roaring before they escaped. 🐅🐅🐅
Pesky carol singers wouldn't leave ... so I let the tigers loose on them.
There was a not-so-SILENT NIGHT with lots of shreiking and roaring before they escaped. 🐅🐅🐅
December 14, 2025 at 10:39 AM
Bradley’s #BadventCalendar Day 14
Pesky carol singers wouldn't leave ... so I let the tigers loose on them.
There was a not-so-SILENT NIGHT with lots of shreiking and roaring before they escaped. 🐅🐅🐅
Pesky carol singers wouldn't leave ... so I let the tigers loose on them.
There was a not-so-SILENT NIGHT with lots of shreiking and roaring before they escaped. 🐅🐅🐅
Thrilled to get this gorgeous piece of original artwork from GO FOR IT, RUBY! as a 60th Birthday gift from the lovely Rebecca Harry.
#RubyTheDuckling 🐥
#RubyTheDuckling 🐥
December 13, 2025 at 4:07 PM
Thrilled to get this gorgeous piece of original artwork from GO FOR IT, RUBY! as a 60th Birthday gift from the lovely Rebecca Harry.
#RubyTheDuckling 🐥
#RubyTheDuckling 🐥
We've stopped using this fireplace, but I miss having it lit at this time of year. So I covered some cardboard with radiator reflector (you could use tin foil) and cut it to fit at an angle over the grate, then put some fairy lights on top. This is the pleasing result.
#ChristmasDecorations
#ChristmasDecorations
December 13, 2025 at 11:08 AM
We've stopped using this fireplace, but I miss having it lit at this time of year. So I covered some cardboard with radiator reflector (you could use tin foil) and cut it to fit at an angle over the grate, then put some fairy lights on top. This is the pleasing result.
#ChristmasDecorations
#ChristmasDecorations