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Linda Tirado

@killermartinis.bsky.social

7.7K followers 110 following 1.2K posts

Answering to many names.

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Linda Tirado @killermartinis.bsky.social · Aug 16

And so, to review like I do with my kids before they leave:

Are we happy?
Are we healthy?
Are we safe?
Are there any nazis within reach we must deal with immediately?

Good. Now go fuck some shit up.

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Linda Tirado @killermartinis.bsky.social · 1d

It's just my life.

Keep_You_Warm @yarngirl-mug.bsky.social · 1d

@killermartinis.bsky.social I know we’ve not interacted, but I’ve followed you for years on the bad place and now you here.

Watching the Billy Joel documentary, and thinking of all of your Billy Joel tweets/posts over the years. ❤️

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Linda Tirado @killermartinis.bsky.social · 1d

Labor in general. The tables are widely available so long as the administration hasn't yet found them disagreeable for whatever reason. I am sure you are capable of extrapolating by sector.

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Linda Tirado @killermartinis.bsky.social · 1d

Perhaps you are not aware of the most common injuries in American labor. Sport of any sort does not break the top twenty. Policing doesn't break the top ten.

By far, the most dangerous jobs in America are to do with transport or the production of food.

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Linda Tirado @killermartinis.bsky.social · 1d

I think that a lot of discussion of celebrities is people thinking they're discussing a person and not a machine. My critique is with the CEO, not the artist.

Linda Tirado @killermartinis.bsky.social · 1d

Her whole life is a super weird problem. I feel for the lady on that. Also it isn't in any way her fault that her fans have decided that she runs worldwide cultural hegemony.

But she also doesn't discourage them. She's grown, she's making choices.

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Linda Tirado @killermartinis.bsky.social · 1d

What I do know is that fairly soon we won't have to hear from her fans about how really some shitty lyrics about adolescent angst are somehow relevant to everyone alive because of ticket sales.

So that is nice to look towards.

Linda Tirado @killermartinis.bsky.social · 1d

Not my music, i can respect the talent, I'm not saying she cant write catchy music. but the image has always been creepy af, and the way she's always played it has been peak bucket crabs even when she owned the whole ocean. Now she has to switch her narrative and idk she knows how to.

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Linda Tirado @killermartinis.bsky.social · 1d

Man if Taylor swift gets the wobbles from thinking about dudes playing football i think maybe she hasn't realized that she's fundamentally not human enough to date literally anyone who does labor.

People who fetishize this sort of thing creep me out, its not like her whole career hasn't been teehee

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Reposted by Linda Tirado

The Onion @theonion.com · 1d

U.S. Military Carries Out Strike On Scuffy The Tugboat https://theonion.com/u-s-military-carries-out-strike-on-scuffy-the-tugboat/

U.S. Military Carries Out Strike On Scuffy The Tugboat
Pentagon Claims Little Red Vessel Working With ‘Narco-Terrorists’

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Linda Tirado @killermartinis.bsky.social · 1d

Good morning.

States may or not be invading other states at federal direction, the general public does not understand posse comitatus or titles 10/32

Bari Weiss and Jeff Bezos and Elon Musk are the media

Saddle up cowboys today will be a rough ride

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Linda Tirado @killermartinis.bsky.social · 2d

I did figure out how to draw a podcasting vole, so we have that

Dude I said it was a podcasting vole, why are you searching the image, it is a rodent with a mic. Which I guess is technically true but it's a shit description.

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Linda Tirado @killermartinis.bsky.social · 2d

Okay I did not have "Jake tapped maybe interviewing a staffer via text and reporting an interview" on my bingo card but then again I bet we wouldn't still be in a penguin trade war by September, so maybe I just don't know anything anymore.

Kevin Elliott @kjephd.bsky.social · 2d

Jake Tapper did a whole interview with Trump by text message? Which means he can't actually confirm it was him. And now everyone's asking even more than before very reasonable questions about the wannabe dictator's health.

www.independent.co.uk/news/world/a...

The CNN anchor did not explain how he verified that it was the president — not any of his aides — who authored the written responses to his questions.

He also did not explain whether he’d made any effort to speak with the president by phone, something that has become commonplace for reporters covering the second Trump administration because Trump has maintained use of his personal mobile phone since returning to the presidency and frequently uses it to contact reporters directly.

The president’s purported text message exchange with Tapper was also unusual because Trump is not known to be a frequent user of his phone’s text message capacity.

He also famously eschews email and other written forms of communication and during his first term he openly complained when attorneys working for his administration took notes during meetings.

Trump’s unconventional use of text-based communications to purportedly respond to Tapper comes as questions continue to swirl about the state of his health

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Linda Tirado @killermartinis.bsky.social · 2d

I'd notice, im only here cause this is where half of y'all I know went to, I cant go chasing everyone!

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Linda Tirado @killermartinis.bsky.social · 2d

Good satire is only the one idea in twenty or fifty that gets past planning though so maybe it's just yours hasn't hit yet

Linda Tirado @killermartinis.bsky.social · 2d

To be clear it's copperplate *style* as even my level of general insanity couldn't cope with actual woodcutting for this

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Linda Tirado @killermartinis.bsky.social · 2d

Oh nothing just doing 18th century copperplates for entirely made up taxonomies written in fake Latin which requires a ten page intro about the kingdom rules.

And laundry.

What this picture shows is the end result of what happens when someone switches from liquor to caffeine and then the news goes slightly mad. It is entirely nonsensical. It is utterly useless. It might be one of the funniest things I have ever done.

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Linda Tirado @killermartinis.bsky.social · 2d

Look Nina Simone appreciation days are hardcore mate it's all good

Linda Tirado @killermartinis.bsky.social · 2d

She clearly passes by the second half then

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Linda Tirado @killermartinis.bsky.social · 2d

Nina Simone > literally any of your faves and all their faves unless they are smart and their faves consist of Nina Simone.

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Linda Tirado @killermartinis.bsky.social · 3d

I mean

Are you sure

I dont even know when to duck

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Linda Tirado @killermartinis.bsky.social · 3d

I did not really think through this entire concept before I got into it and now I have to finish it or it will haunt my dreams

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Linda Tirado @killermartinis.bsky.social · 3d

I am not refusing the news because I am not paying attention. I simply can't keep pace with this much breaking and advise you follow folks on the ground.

In the meantime, I will continue to try and explain how we got here and what we're dealing with.

Via cartoons.

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Linda Tirado @killermartinis.bsky.social · 3d

I need you all to know that my silly book idea has me debating whether trump is better as a turkey or a goose becsuse one is loud and abrasive and needs attention and one is loud and abrasive and shits everywhere. But a turkey has a wattle, and this might signify.

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Reposted by Linda Tirado

Hausu M.D. 🎥👺📼🍉🖤 @suspiraserhead.bsky.social · 3d

The funniest thing about this is how legit terrified ICE looks.

competentposter @competentposter.bsky.social · 4d

wizard frog is insane

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Linda Tirado @killermartinis.bsky.social · 3d

a bald man in a red and black uniform is pointing

ALT: a bald man in a red and black uniform is pointing

media.tenor.com