Jesse (🐊’s kitten)
@kiryusmalewife.gay
Actually a cat irl. Polyamorous lover of hot old men. Proudly trans and intersex. 💍 to Kiryu, hyper fixated on RGG and One Piece. 🔞 PFP: lunareden.bsky.social
Can post a pic of the tree because the company name is on it but I’m absolutely posting this.
December 10, 2025 at 8:32 PM
Can post a pic of the tree because the company name is on it but I’m absolutely posting this.
Also a lazy picture of the inside of my kenne- I mean bed.
This probably interests no one but I do not care. It is cozy in here and I am safe from the world.
This probably interests no one but I do not care. It is cozy in here and I am safe from the world.
December 7, 2025 at 3:31 AM
Also a lazy picture of the inside of my kenne- I mean bed.
This probably interests no one but I do not care. It is cozy in here and I am safe from the world.
This probably interests no one but I do not care. It is cozy in here and I am safe from the world.
I never posted my cute bedroom furniture because I was like half unpacked all year but please perceive my Disney princess bedroom furniture.
December 7, 2025 at 2:30 AM
I never posted my cute bedroom furniture because I was like half unpacked all year but please perceive my Disney princess bedroom furniture.
Love my dad but he is sending me a shitload of unfunny, bland Christmas memes and I straight up do not know how to reply.
What am I supposed to do with this? Who is boring enough to make memes like this? HE’S STILL SENDING THEM SOMEONE HELP ME.
What am I supposed to do with this? Who is boring enough to make memes like this? HE’S STILL SENDING THEM SOMEONE HELP ME.
December 6, 2025 at 9:30 PM
Love my dad but he is sending me a shitload of unfunny, bland Christmas memes and I straight up do not know how to reply.
What am I supposed to do with this? Who is boring enough to make memes like this? HE’S STILL SENDING THEM SOMEONE HELP ME.
What am I supposed to do with this? Who is boring enough to make memes like this? HE’S STILL SENDING THEM SOMEONE HELP ME.
It looked like this btw. Except it was obviously a pastel blue shirt.
Not so fun fact: This shirt is what I wore at a gas station in my shithole city that caused a man to watch me very closely and indicate that he was thinking about stabbing me. So that was cool.
I still miss it though. RIP.
Not so fun fact: This shirt is what I wore at a gas station in my shithole city that caused a man to watch me very closely and indicate that he was thinking about stabbing me. So that was cool.
I still miss it though. RIP.
December 6, 2025 at 6:18 PM
It looked like this btw. Except it was obviously a pastel blue shirt.
Not so fun fact: This shirt is what I wore at a gas station in my shithole city that caused a man to watch me very closely and indicate that he was thinking about stabbing me. So that was cool.
I still miss it though. RIP.
Not so fun fact: This shirt is what I wore at a gas station in my shithole city that caused a man to watch me very closely and indicate that he was thinking about stabbing me. So that was cool.
I still miss it though. RIP.
So uhhh. This shirt can still be salvaged, right? (Joking.)
December 6, 2025 at 6:13 PM
So uhhh. This shirt can still be salvaged, right? (Joking.)
I told my dad this weekend that I haven’t seen Elf and he told me I need to see it. I said I’d watch it on Christmas because I’m planning to watch Christmas movies that day.
Anyway that’s the context for this funny text from an old person.
Anyway that’s the context for this funny text from an old person.
December 2, 2025 at 10:46 PM
I told my dad this weekend that I haven’t seen Elf and he told me I need to see it. I said I’d watch it on Christmas because I’m planning to watch Christmas movies that day.
Anyway that’s the context for this funny text from an old person.
Anyway that’s the context for this funny text from an old person.
Anyway my sister got me some of the light saber chopsticks and they’re cool and exactly what I wanted in my life right now.
November 29, 2025 at 2:09 AM
Anyway my sister got me some of the light saber chopsticks and they’re cool and exactly what I wanted in my life right now.
“Sorry I’m late to work. There was a kitty.”
November 26, 2025 at 1:48 PM
“Sorry I’m late to work. There was a kitty.”
The thing they don’t tell you about being a very long boy with very long legs is that you be bumping the funny bone of your knee into shit and it really, really hurts.
November 24, 2025 at 9:57 PM
The thing they don’t tell you about being a very long boy with very long legs is that you be bumping the funny bone of your knee into shit and it really, really hurts.
You can’t see the roasted garlic sauce I made for this ham sammy, but it’s there and it fucks.
November 23, 2025 at 5:35 PM
You can’t see the roasted garlic sauce I made for this ham sammy, but it’s there and it fucks.
Oh shit we got Thanksgiving at work today. Texas does have some redeeming qualities.
November 21, 2025 at 6:34 PM
Oh shit we got Thanksgiving at work today. Texas does have some redeeming qualities.
Me: *sneezes*
Heidi:
Heidi:
November 20, 2025 at 11:36 PM
Me: *sneezes*
Heidi:
Heidi:
I roasted a turkey this weekend and it turned out so well that I didn’t really carve it afterward so much as gently tug the bones out.
I was like that black guy with the ribs on tiktok.
I was like that black guy with the ribs on tiktok.
November 16, 2025 at 11:44 PM
I roasted a turkey this weekend and it turned out so well that I didn’t really carve it afterward so much as gently tug the bones out.
I was like that black guy with the ribs on tiktok.
I was like that black guy with the ribs on tiktok.
Me after having a really nice conversation with the incredibly cute doctor I get my vaccines from and low key have a tiny crush on.
November 14, 2025 at 11:28 PM
Me after having a really nice conversation with the incredibly cute doctor I get my vaccines from and low key have a tiny crush on.
Without downloading new pictures, describe your gender.
November 13, 2025 at 1:28 PM
Without downloading new pictures, describe your gender.
Listen it’s fine, it doesn’t matter, it really doesn’t.
But the kerning on this is so awful lmao. I hate it so much.
But the kerning on this is so awful lmao. I hate it so much.
November 11, 2025 at 6:57 PM
Listen it’s fine, it doesn’t matter, it really doesn’t.
But the kerning on this is so awful lmao. I hate it so much.
But the kerning on this is so awful lmao. I hate it so much.
That hour in the bathtub healed me.
November 11, 2025 at 1:34 AM
That hour in the bathtub healed me.
I had one (1) tiny thing go wrong today that really upset me, so I made myself a dinner of snacks.
I can have a little salami, as a treat.
I can have a little salami, as a treat.
November 10, 2025 at 11:56 PM
I had one (1) tiny thing go wrong today that really upset me, so I made myself a dinner of snacks.
I can have a little salami, as a treat.
I can have a little salami, as a treat.
I feel like garbage today and yet I am compelled to do work. What cruel god would subject a good little boy to such a terrible fate?
November 10, 2025 at 7:14 PM
I feel like garbage today and yet I am compelled to do work. What cruel god would subject a good little boy to such a terrible fate?
Image on the top right perfectly cropped to capture my attention. This is all I needed to be immediately invested. This game is looking breas- I mean boob- I mean great.
November 8, 2025 at 4:08 PM
Image on the top right perfectly cropped to capture my attention. This is all I needed to be immediately invested. This game is looking breas- I mean boob- I mean great.
Say hello to the roughly 50 lbs of turkey I impulsively bought for $25.
November 7, 2025 at 11:34 PM
Say hello to the roughly 50 lbs of turkey I impulsively bought for $25.
WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING LMAO
November 6, 2025 at 9:03 PM
WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING LMAO
SO JUST IMMEDIATELY AGAIN, HUH??
November 6, 2025 at 7:57 PM
SO JUST IMMEDIATELY AGAIN, HUH??
Oh okay so just immediately, huh?
November 6, 2025 at 6:50 PM
Oh okay so just immediately, huh?