A Keller Christmas Vacation

Verdict: You'll either love it or hate it but the cast is fire

Too cheesy, too slapstick, too badly written OR a fun family romp with a great cast

Rating: Hits or Misses the Target but definitely worth the try to see where your arrow lands

A Royal Christmas Manor (UPtv)

Verdict: All these UPtv movies are unwatchable, I can't do this anymore. I quit.

Rating: I don't know, I couldn't do it, I'm sorry. UPtv joining GaF. FYI, this was unwatchable

Can you imagine a new viewer to this show.

So... which one's Hudson?
Oh, Hudson mysteriously disappeared and literally nobody cares. Not even his long-term partner.
So why should I?
You shouldn't.
Let's watch Madame Blanc instead.

This is such a cynical cash grab, especially since the production didn't even both trying to work with John Reardon to come up with a solution.
Cancel and reboot if necessary. Don't fire your sick lead, keep his character's name on the show, and keep this lame duck limping on.
Just awful.

Christmas Above the Clouds (Hallmark Channel)

Verdict: The Ghost of Low Budget

Not sure how Dickens would feel about Scrooge's redemption being their ex but, with this budget, I'm cutting everyone some slack

Rating: Very very low rent fun

From the same people that got him employed in the first place, when he was wildly unqualified?
I'd like to know as well

A Newport Christmas (Hallmark Channel)

Verdict: Unfortunately for this film, a Biltmore Christmas exists.

Pretty good, if lightweight, time travel romcom that can't compare to its better cousin

Rating: Good

The Great Christmas Snow-In (UPtv)

Verdict: It should stay snowed in far away

If they tell you it's not possible to make sexless porn, then show them this

Rating: Dear God, make it stop

Christmas On Duty (Hallmark)

Verdict: Brain-off fun

Wildly inaccurate US military soft power propaganda that's nonetheless not too bad

Rating: Brain off, TV on

Merry Christmas, Ted Cooper! (Hallmark)

Verdict: Fantastic

Zippy and genuinely funny

Rating: Movie of the year (so far)

A Christmas Angel Match (Hallmark)

Verdict: Bizarre

An angel office romance with performance reviews, end-of-year bonuses and a plethora of anatomy questions

Rating: Barely watchable

I snorted all the way through it, as God apparently had very specific opinions on Florentine micro politics and how all of Dante's personal political adversaries deserved hell.
It was honestly hilarious.
As far as biblical fan fiction goes, though, it's much better than Joseph Smith's nonsense.