Pinned
Jared Kilner
@localexpert.bsky.social
· Dec 28
Just met a psychic who's in therapy for their future trauma.
Say what you want about "free speech"
October 15, 2025 at 5:30 PM
Say what you want about "free speech"
I guess the Atlantis Comedy Festival has been pushed back ANOTHER year.
October 4, 2025 at 4:21 PM
I guess the Atlantis Comedy Festival has been pushed back ANOTHER year.
Are there any new developments in the search for Atlantis?
September 28, 2025 at 12:26 PM
Are there any new developments in the search for Atlantis?
A Slip 'n' Slide is only deemed "legal" if the Slip is in equal proportion to the Slide, +/- 4.5% (and that's being generous).
September 23, 2025 at 7:55 PM
A Slip 'n' Slide is only deemed "legal" if the Slip is in equal proportion to the Slide, +/- 4.5% (and that's being generous).
In my head I always mix up Jimmy Kimmel with Jimmy Kernel, the famous popcorn enthusiast.
September 23, 2025 at 7:48 PM
In my head I always mix up Jimmy Kimmel with Jimmy Kernel, the famous popcorn enthusiast.
Woah, mind blown! I always thought it was spelled Brock O'Balma.
July 4, 2025 at 12:17 PM
Woah, mind blown! I always thought it was spelled Brock O'Balma.
Trump will probably make Floyd Mayweather the new Librarian of Congress.
May 10, 2025 at 2:16 AM
Trump will probably make Floyd Mayweather the new Librarian of Congress.
New -- Joe's Crab Shack, right near historic Mar-a-Lago! got crabs?
April 2, 2025 at 7:22 PM
New -- Joe's Crab Shack, right near historic Mar-a-Lago! got crabs?
It's been a week since Julius Caesar was killed, and immature people are still going around, miming stabbing/being stabbed in the back. I honestly think some people need to GROW UP! He was still a human being with a family... have some respect for the dead.
March 22, 2025 at 1:50 PM
It's been a week since Julius Caesar was killed, and immature people are still going around, miming stabbing/being stabbed in the back. I honestly think some people need to GROW UP! He was still a human being with a family... have some respect for the dead.
Silly String isn't as silly as it used to be.
February 27, 2025 at 2:48 AM
Silly String isn't as silly as it used to be.
Pictured: Representatives of Elon Musk attempting to enter U.S.A.I.D. secure area:
February 3, 2025 at 3:13 AM
Pictured: Representatives of Elon Musk attempting to enter U.S.A.I.D. secure area:
Humpy Herbert Hoover hummed a happy hippy hymn
January 31, 2025 at 7:03 PM
Humpy Herbert Hoover hummed a happy hippy hymn
Legend says if you dress up as Santa on Halloween, the Easter Bunny will put a pot of gold teeth under your pillow.
January 24, 2025 at 2:56 AM
Legend says if you dress up as Santa on Halloween, the Easter Bunny will put a pot of gold teeth under your pillow.
Conservatives: We want free speech!
Me:
Me:
January 23, 2025 at 5:08 PM
Conservatives: We want free speech!
Me:
Me:
Breaking News: Big Oil demands an apology from "woke" Ozone Layer and threatens to sue for defamation.
January 22, 2025 at 7:50 PM
Breaking News: Big Oil demands an apology from "woke" Ozone Layer and threatens to sue for defamation.
Okay, this is weird... how did Amazon know I have back & body pain??
January 22, 2025 at 2:34 AM
Okay, this is weird... how did Amazon know I have back & body pain??
I gave my priest a gentle beard soap for Christmas, and it's been a lifesaver! Now, when he leans in for a kiss, I no longer have to worry about his beard scratching me!
January 22, 2025 at 2:31 AM
I gave my priest a gentle beard soap for Christmas, and it's been a lifesaver! Now, when he leans in for a kiss, I no longer have to worry about his beard scratching me!
woah... Amazon is INSPIRED by my shopping trends; this is the boost I needed today!
January 14, 2025 at 9:15 PM
woah... Amazon is INSPIRED by my shopping trends; this is the boost I needed today!
It's 2015: two stage lighting enthusiasts go out on a date to see the movie Spotlight.
January 12, 2025 at 6:37 AM
It's 2015: two stage lighting enthusiasts go out on a date to see the movie Spotlight.
I used to look like Freddy Krueger until the factory I worked at had a horrible flood.
December 28, 2024 at 9:35 PM
I used to look like Freddy Krueger until the factory I worked at had a horrible flood.
Just met a psychic who's in therapy for their future trauma.
December 28, 2024 at 9:28 PM
Just met a psychic who's in therapy for their future trauma.