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me making sure to include just a dash of completely abstruse nothingburger diced up and distributed throughout my kinda-unique-but-not-really-all-that-amazing piece of media so 20 years later people will make 4 hour video essays about how it's misunderstood genius
December 9, 2025 at 2:06 AM
amazing how out of touch tech CEOs will create a product no one needs and somehow makes millions, but it's a failure because it didn't make brazillions (low estimate of three thousand dollars profit over every person on earth)
December 7, 2025 at 5:49 AM
me skimming through and taking the shallowest possible reading of The Gospel of Wealth:

"so I need to figure out the exact optimal amount of money to donate to maximize the return in YouTube ad revenue"
December 6, 2025 at 5:57 PM
nothing I love more than my brain waiting to alert me that my bladder is full until approximately 12-and-a-half seconds before I piss all over myself
December 6, 2025 at 4:00 AM
being bluntly misunderstood while trying to have a very specifically nuanced opinion and them focusing on a tangential point is like asking for hot chocolate and getting a bottle of piss-warm yoohoo
December 2, 2025 at 4:24 AM
when your favorite bit of a song is in the bridge so it only happens once and they never do anything with it
December 2, 2025 at 12:46 AM
had a dream the UK government sent me a letter that my "online personal ID" had been hacked and used for illegally searching the word "boobies" and that I was going to be sent to prison on the Isle of Wight

I'm not British
November 30, 2025 at 12:07 PM
was woken in a panic from a dead sleep by the central heating turning on that hadn't quite burned off all the accumulated dust from the year, which sucks, but hey! at least I'm confident I won't die asleep in a fire
November 30, 2025 at 12:05 PM
what's the point of an arboretum with no fruit trees? shit just call it an arborlookum them

on an unrelated note I've been banned from the local botanical gardens
November 25, 2025 at 3:59 PM
londoner: you are colourblind

new yorker: oh are colorblind
November 23, 2025 at 4:36 PM
imagine if English had directly formed a noun for a person who practices a profession instead of substantivizing the adjective, we coulda called them professioners instead of professionals
November 23, 2025 at 2:36 AM
"no the English vocative particle isn't archaic! it's not! it's not archaic!" screams the dictionary man, while literally no one listens to him because he's fuckin' stupid, and wrong, and also stupid
November 22, 2025 at 5:46 PM
man, spending time around translation centric spaces really has burdened me with now noticing stock translation phrases, like "it can't be helped" for 「仕方がない」.

now I see it all the time, like in the Maude translation of Tolstoy's War and Pea–
November 20, 2025 at 7:45 AM
if friend shaped, then why no-

wait holy shit literally friend shape
November 19, 2025 at 8:23 AM
it'd be pretty cool to die in a well publicized way, then amidst my memorial have the news break that I'd committed all sorts of horrendous terrible acts, and then the next day it break that all of those things were just events in a book I wrote that someone thought was an actual memoir
November 18, 2025 at 1:13 AM
contemplative: adj.
1. for the purposes of polytheism
2. for the purposes of collection of patterns
November 17, 2025 at 3:20 PM
Reposted by Luceo
me: why do i never seem to have free time
also me: just spent a hour and a half reviewing a PR on a project i don't even maintain
November 17, 2025 at 3:13 PM
dreamt that the Falklands War ended with the islands as a condominium, and in England it became equally common to call them "The Falklands" or "Las Malvinas", but the Tories started a culture war against people saying "The Malvinas", saying they wanted England to be a province of Argentina
November 14, 2025 at 10:30 AM
hey, you know thing that was extremely well received when it came out, yea it's actually bad. it's very obvious why it's bad, that's why it took the community 10 years to come up with 12 whole negative talking points (8 are about aesthetic philosophy)
November 12, 2025 at 11:15 AM
currently aspiring to become the first person to ever simultaneously suffer Capgras delusions and theomania: everyone I know has been replaced by imposters and I was the one who did it
November 11, 2025 at 2:22 AM
come buy my amazing new screen with an infinite contrast ratio! the pixels are either 1 nit bright or completely off

(it's almost like that's a completely useless metric if the minimum compared brightness isn't a value greater than 0)
November 6, 2025 at 9:37 AM
within this study we observe the effects of ChatGPT on a developing mind

group A was given access to ChatGPT
group B was not

and our control group (my shit-ass son) was locked in a box in a dark room and fed flavorless nutritional paste with no human contact for the duration
November 5, 2025 at 8:14 PM
had a dream there was an episode of QI with Russell Brand as a guest and every single question was just taking the piss out of Brand. every time he'd start to open his mouth the klaxon would go off and flash "shut the fuck up" and at the end of the episode Sandi threw a brick right in his face
October 29, 2025 at 8:57 AM
why is it that like 25% of full versions of anime OPs are like:

intro
verse from TV version
chorus
new second verse
chorus
world's worst bridge that almost ruins the whole song
chorus
outro
October 16, 2025 at 9:19 PM
person who's never seen the word before but is trying to look smart:

"yea, something's exorbitant if you launch it into space"
October 14, 2025 at 3:21 AM