Update : I crashed tf out about this girl for three days and finally told my bf I was crashing out and he literally held me in his arms and told me I am an ethereal goddess and then texted me today to check on me and make sure I’m okay and tell me again that I am beautiful and amazing

I have really bad retroactive jealousy. Always been a thing. I can’t help it. Don’t wanna know who you banged or loved or touched before me. They do not exist partner!! Not for me! Bc I mentally can’t cope with that reality. Irrational? Sure. Unfair? Eh if I make it your problem, sure. (I won’t) BUT

I really miss having a best friend I could text when I’m having an absolute delusional irrational crash out session and she’d just get it and know what I mean immediately and be like yes bitch I know isn’t it awful

somehow found a man who is both Edward Ferrars and Colonel Brandon

had an interview and then went to my bf’s house still dressed up in my fancy clothes & when he answered the door he immediately just looked at me and got all giddy and giggly and was like “you’re so pretty omg you look like an angel you’re so so pretty how are you so pretty”

nooo watching a movie about a woman whose boyfriend dies in front of her while cuddling my very much alive boyfriend’s shirt bc it smells like him and he’s in another city and I’m sad and I miss him isn’t causing me emotional distress I’m fine 😀

I have never wanted to share my life with a man the way I want to share it with this man 😭😭 every time I have to be away from him just makes me wish I could be with him always and I don’t like anyone that much. I’ve never wanted someone to be by my side for all of my days like I want him 🥺🥺

The difference between being just desired and being valued, cherished, appreciated, and wholly loved is wild.

when we go to a gas station and my bf says “do you want a little treat?” followed by “I love you, lock the door and don’t open it for anybody” before he goes in lookin fine af 😩😩

Been on the verge of breaking down since Sunday. After months of peace, I finally felt safe and free. But Sunday, I was faced with just one more abusive, hateful action from my ex. He changed the security code and the padlock on my storage unit where I’d been storing my things since I left him.

my boss just got back from a cruise her bf surprised her with for Christmas. Apparently she had a horrible time - he berated her and called her names, complained constantly, etc. Literally anything she did or said was met with vitriol and aggression. This is how I lived for 2 years!!!

I can’t believe I spent my whole adult life NOT being treated like a princess by my partner?? Like, this man is so good to me and I never even knew it could be like this?? He’s just good, idk, it’s wild to me.

hell yeah finally I get to post my unhinged thoughts again

who else lays awake at night thinking of horrible ways to die? last night it was attacked by a mountain lion