Matthew FitzSimmons
@matthewfitzsimmons.bsky.social
Lives in Washington D.C., writes novels, provides shade and a central meeting place at concerts. Rep'd by David Hale Smith at Inkwell Management.
Latest novel is The Slate, available now: https://a.co/d/dDW6gce
Latest novel is The Slate, available now: https://a.co/d/dDW6gce
And her mama...
December 2, 2025 at 6:24 PM
And her mama...
Did movie stars learn that Phillip Seymour Hoffman had been cast in their next project get excited, or were they like.... fuck, I'm going to get murdered live on celluloid?
December 2, 2025 at 6:19 PM
Did movie stars learn that Phillip Seymour Hoffman had been cast in their next project get excited, or were they like.... fuck, I'm going to get murdered live on celluloid?
I would watch a Die Hard prequel that is just Ellis macking on the ladies and making that green.
December 2, 2025 at 4:19 PM
I would watch a Die Hard prequel that is just Ellis macking on the ladies and making that green.
The Fresh Prince of Jerk Heaven, and it's not even close.
December 2, 2025 at 4:14 PM
The Fresh Prince of Jerk Heaven, and it's not even close.
Highlander is a fucking terrible franchise. Clancy Brown at least gave a fuck and redeems the first one. Queen also rocks.
December 2, 2025 at 3:28 PM
Highlander is a fucking terrible franchise. Clancy Brown at least gave a fuck and redeems the first one. Queen also rocks.
This was originally a prime time show in '61, but later was a staple on Saturday mornings.
December 2, 2025 at 3:18 PM
This was originally a prime time show in '61, but later was a staple on Saturday mornings.
29 days until deadline and 150 pages of rewrites to go makes Matthew something something.
November 21, 2025 at 2:06 PM
29 days until deadline and 150 pages of rewrites to go makes Matthew something something.
You buy a bird feeder with dreams of beautiful plumage and rarely glimpsed avian wonders only to see thirty dollars worth of birdseed ravaged by a horde of sparrows in under forty-five seconds.
November 14, 2025 at 6:42 PM
You buy a bird feeder with dreams of beautiful plumage and rarely glimpsed avian wonders only to see thirty dollars worth of birdseed ravaged by a horde of sparrows in under forty-five seconds.
Lawyers putting on a hell of a reenactment at the Subway Sandwich Guy’s trial today.
November 4, 2025 at 11:56 PM
Lawyers putting on a hell of a reenactment at the Subway Sandwich Guy’s trial today.