Moby Mick
@moby-ick.bsky.social
230 followers 680 following 740 posts
Call me stupid all you want, you can’t hurt me with the truth.
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moby-ick.bsky.social
Only the true king of England can unclog my toilet.
moby-ick.bsky.social
“Glory Hole” but it’s just a hollowed out bible where I keep a corndog
moby-ick.bsky.social
Mastodon crashed five minutes in. Great first impression.
moby-ick.bsky.social
Someone needs to tell dems that healthcare doesn’t work as a platform anymore because half the country thinks you can cure cancer by getting sunburned on the taint.
moby-ick.bsky.social
@americanredcross.bsky.social if you keep calling me twice a day about donating blood, I’m going to start drawing my blood myself and hiding it around the city for you to find. Let’s see how urgently you really need O+
moby-ick.bsky.social
I am a white man on social media. If you criticize me even a little bit, I will become a fascist. Please laugh at my jokes.
Reposted by Moby Mick
granitedhuine.bsky.social
The top five worst ways to be found:

5. Out
4. Guilty
3. Wanting
2. Dead
1. By your email
moby-ick.bsky.social
The Yankees should try striking out Guerrero
moby-ick.bsky.social
Meletus: I’m getting kinda sick of this Socrates guy.

Socrates: are we human, or are we dancer?

Meletus: that’s fucking it
moby-ick.bsky.social
My wife doesn’t believe the poop could stay on his balls but she won’t let me show her the picture.
moby-ick.bsky.social
Every episode of The Dog Whisperer is about how the couple actually need a divorce
moby-ick.bsky.social
If Pope Leo is really anti-AI, he should be taking cues from Orange Catholicism right now
moby-ick.bsky.social
The Papal Bull Sublimis Deus actually justifies owning AIs as slaves
moby-ick.bsky.social
Baby, you don’t understand. If my brother and I don’t form a blues band and sell out the Palace Hotel Ballroom, the Diocese is going to shut down the orphanage
moby-ick.bsky.social
I’m not your paypal, I’m your payfather
moby-ick.bsky.social
🎶no shoes🎶

🎶no shirt🎶

🎶no condom🎶
moby-ick.bsky.social
Planet of the Raccoons situation
Reposted by Moby Mick
moby-ick.bsky.social
@johnlangan.bsky.social they’re doing Corpsemouth lawn decorations.
ehhjax.bsky.social
October 1st brings all the skeletons to the yard
A giant skeleton climbing out of the ground/lawn. Giant spiders can be seen climbing on the house behind the skeleton
moby-ick.bsky.social
If an alien came into my backyard every night offering me Oreo’s, I could probably be domesticated.
moby-ick.bsky.social
Calling horses a native species of North America is woke now.
moby-ick.bsky.social
We should domesticate raccoons as a societal project. We could all plant a tree under which only our grandchildren would sit. This could be what unites society.
moby-ick.bsky.social
If there isn’t a quote in Pride and Prejudice about Mr. Collins being tone deaf, there should have been.
moby-ick.bsky.social
[David Attenborough voice] Once every five years, the shitposters migrate to a new platform, seeking fresh moderation. But the changing political climate means that such platforms are shrinking.