“You can’t have your cake and eat it too” is such a damn stupid phrase…I don’t want to own a cake for, like, display purposes. Is that a thing people want?? A /liability/??

No, I want to put it in my god damned mouth.

hamburg
there is a reason for jolteon having a wide mouth, and its for burgar

i remembered the one pic of jolteon eating burger
#jolteon #pokemon #art

Nobody has ever dropped a more fire comeback than, “The bar is so low it’s a tripping hazard in hell, and yet here you are limbo dancing with the devil.”

Until abortion is legal in every state, lets require men to get a mandatory vasectomy until they are proven emotionally mature, financially responsible and ready to be a father.
Wait, what do you mean regulations on men's bodies make you uncomfortable?

I have a vague suspicion It’s time to feed my cat.

Truly a sight 🎄

For this holiday travel season I want to remind people of the funniest shit I found you can bring on a plane according to TSA #tsa #thanksgiving #travel #lobster