but I told him I was so sorry if I ever made him feel some type of way and he reassured me no that they explained everything to him perfectly so he didn't actually have questions or anything. but I still feel bad.

it's so frustrating when people seem like they're asking your advice only so they can be contrarians about it (like telling other people "ocalla told me to go to the hospital and I was FINE" type of shit) so yea I'm a little abrupt w ppl past couple years

and I now feel horrible about in the past when I complained about people texting me about rashes or whatever and a few years back I used to make posts on nurses week saying jokingly that if you texted me for medical advice then you owe me a nurses week gift.

.. then I come in and figure out that my patient the next day had received an organ from them, and can't help but feel it's a sign. To see a new lease on life, to see the results of good work we did in the face of something terrible, to honor their gift...

and one of my current patients' family member saw me blinking back tears during the walk & came up and hugged me & told me "you are only human, it is okay" & I had such feelings about the whole thing, from showing emotions (ew) to why I find the process so emotional every time...

and now knowing that I've come this far from being considered a target and a liability to being recognized and thanked for continuing to show up & raise my voice...I am just a LITTLE emotional lol
(and yes I have my quibbles w no kings and see its flaws but I did not expect this at all.)

and I was so scared as a new grad when I told my charge that I didn't agree with her or trump, I was scared when I refused to take my little rainbow pin off, my voice shook at the protest when I kept thinking if I got arrested I'd lose my license. but I had the choice to be scared & so many don't

I was told I should reconsider having a rainbow pin on my badge because "that is too political." that I was told so many times to stop talking, to delete the posts, to be quiet because nurses aren't supposed to be political. and I would always say everything about our job is political, everything

..also I walked from the conference center to my hotel and it was literally faster than waiting on the shuttle bus and my coworkers were HORRIFIED (like when I used public transportation at in Philly at NTI) like there's thousands of other ppl walking around & ATL is not a battlefield lmao