Patch Bohan
@patchbohan.bsky.social
I write screenplays. I listen to podcasts.
When someone tries telling me I must not be a real Star Trek fan.
January 20, 2026 at 6:40 PM
When someone tries telling me I must not be a real Star Trek fan.
My targeted ads are telling me I need tattoos and a new wallet. No thanks, I'm good.
December 29, 2025 at 5:51 PM
My targeted ads are telling me I need tattoos and a new wallet. No thanks, I'm good.
Driving back from the grocery store and I see a bassinet strapped to the back of a truck and I think to myself “This is Florida. There’s a 50/50 chance that there’s still a baby in there.”
December 24, 2025 at 12:51 AM
Driving back from the grocery store and I see a bassinet strapped to the back of a truck and I think to myself “This is Florida. There’s a 50/50 chance that there’s still a baby in there.”
Folks as you pick up your family and friends from the airport this holiday season please remember that MTV's Sean Duffy can suck multiple giant bags of dicks. Like all the bags.
December 19, 2025 at 4:29 AM
Folks as you pick up your family and friends from the airport this holiday season please remember that MTV's Sean Duffy can suck multiple giant bags of dicks. Like all the bags.
Going into 2026 like...
December 17, 2025 at 12:47 AM
Going into 2026 like...
A movie that takes place where you're from
November 24, 2025 at 8:29 AM
A movie that takes place where you're from
"I could smell the onions and mustard."
November 4, 2025 at 8:44 PM
"I could smell the onions and mustard."
PSA: Do not use google maps in a Mall. It will not help you find your store, it will just take you to the Mall entrance.
October 23, 2025 at 1:54 AM
PSA: Do not use google maps in a Mall. It will not help you find your store, it will just take you to the Mall entrance.
Watching Nightbeast and I am sure I have seen this monster design before, but not sure where.
October 21, 2025 at 3:18 AM
Watching Nightbeast and I am sure I have seen this monster design before, but not sure where.
Reposted by Patch Bohan
Just watched a really good horror movie; House of the Long Shadows. Peter Cushing, Vincent Price AND Christopher Lee. Worth checking out.
October 17, 2025 at 4:26 AM
Just watched a really good horror movie; House of the Long Shadows. Peter Cushing, Vincent Price AND Christopher Lee. Worth checking out.
James Earl Jones reading the Raven is still one of the best Treehouse of Horror segments ever.
October 15, 2025 at 10:36 PM
James Earl Jones reading the Raven is still one of the best Treehouse of Horror segments ever.
Reposted by Patch Bohan
This is my dance about how much transphobes suck.
October 9, 2025 at 11:50 PM
This is my dance about how much transphobes suck.
If you haven’t deleted your Disney+ The Simpsons are streaming all of the Treehouse of Horror episodes.
September 29, 2025 at 7:41 PM
If you haven’t deleted your Disney+ The Simpsons are streaming all of the Treehouse of Horror episodes.
On an unrelated note, please don't have sparklers at my funeral.
September 22, 2025 at 3:26 AM
On an unrelated note, please don't have sparklers at my funeral.
Jimmy Kimmel got pulled off the air for talking about Charlie Kirk. Wow. Imagine if he said something really offensive like giving lethal injections to homeless people. Can't imagine the punishment he'd be getting then. /s
a man in a suit and tie is sitting on a couch with his legs crossed .
ALT: a man in a suit and tie is sitting on a couch with his legs crossed .
media.tenor.com
September 18, 2025 at 12:09 AM
Jimmy Kimmel got pulled off the air for talking about Charlie Kirk. Wow. Imagine if he said something really offensive like giving lethal injections to homeless people. Can't imagine the punishment he'd be getting then. /s
Just sitting in my room listening to a particular Queen song.
September 10, 2025 at 10:44 PM
Just sitting in my room listening to a particular Queen song.
Yes Very Sad Anyway Loki Sad GIF
ALT: Yes Very Sad Anyway Loki Sad GIF
media.tenor.com
September 10, 2025 at 8:02 PM
Reposted by Patch Bohan
Television legend Stephen Colbert has just signed a $13.5 million deal with Netflix for a 7-episode series.
August 30, 2025 at 6:23 PM
Television legend Stephen Colbert has just signed a $13.5 million deal with Netflix for a 7-episode series.
“I gave my life to Christ in the Cracker Barrel parking lot!”
August 22, 2025 at 3:51 AM
“I gave my life to Christ in the Cracker Barrel parking lot!”
Reposted by Patch Bohan
Airport security is depressing enough; do we really need to stare at Kristi Noem’s ghoulish face while we wait? I heard a puppy barking the whole time. IT COULD SENSE HER EVIL!
August 15, 2025 at 10:51 AM
Airport security is depressing enough; do we really need to stare at Kristi Noem’s ghoulish face while we wait? I heard a puppy barking the whole time. IT COULD SENSE HER EVIL!
So Donald Trump couldn’t call in the National Guard on January Sixth but some dude called Big Balls gets roughed up and suddenly DC is on lockdown? Am I missing something?
August 11, 2025 at 1:42 AM
So Donald Trump couldn’t call in the National Guard on January Sixth but some dude called Big Balls gets roughed up and suddenly DC is on lockdown? Am I missing something?
Dammit it Paramount. You have to pull this 💩 right when new Star Trek is coming out!?!? Now I have to seriously debate whether or not to cancel my subscription.
July 19, 2025 at 5:17 AM
Dammit it Paramount. You have to pull this 💩 right when new Star Trek is coming out!?!? Now I have to seriously debate whether or not to cancel my subscription.