Patrick Lenton
@patricklenton.bsky.social
(He/him) freelance writer and editor. Author of some books.
My debut novel ‘In Spite of You’ out in 2025.
Subscribe to my newsletter: https://heterosexualnonsense.substack.com/
Read my articles:
https://linktr.ee/patricklenton
My debut novel ‘In Spite of You’ out in 2025.
Subscribe to my newsletter: https://heterosexualnonsense.substack.com/
Read my articles:
https://linktr.ee/patricklenton
Slightly more expensive pants
January 20, 2026 at 11:24 AM
Slightly more expensive pants
It’s also going through a divorce :(
January 14, 2026 at 10:36 PM
It’s also going through a divorce :(
Did Susan write this about Edmund
January 6, 2026 at 11:17 AM
Did Susan write this about Edmund
Basil and his toy horde
December 25, 2025 at 4:52 AM
Basil and his toy horde
New saddest short story dropped
December 16, 2025 at 9:29 AM
New saddest short story dropped
Wonderful things happening on Twitter
November 25, 2025 at 11:05 PM
Wonderful things happening on Twitter
Genetically, not a nice guy!
November 19, 2025 at 6:59 AM
Genetically, not a nice guy!
How come my sense of humour has remained exactly the same
November 12, 2025 at 10:39 PM
How come my sense of humour has remained exactly the same
When you’ve bloody had it up to here with the weather
November 11, 2025 at 3:38 AM
When you’ve bloody had it up to here with the weather
back in my day we just called them "chefs"
November 10, 2025 at 9:11 AM
back in my day we just called them "chefs"
Judge: what evidence does the prosecutors put forward to prove that the defendant is guilty?
Lawyer: things that were… things that are… and some things…that have not yet come to pass.
Lawyer: things that were… things that are… and some things…that have not yet come to pass.
November 5, 2025 at 6:32 AM
Judge: what evidence does the prosecutors put forward to prove that the defendant is guilty?
Lawyer: things that were… things that are… and some things…that have not yet come to pass.
Lawyer: things that were… things that are… and some things…that have not yet come to pass.
Sufjan Stevens in 2005:
October 28, 2025 at 3:26 AM
Sufjan Stevens in 2005:
“I’ve stopped killing old people and hoarding their bones”
October 24, 2025 at 5:23 AM
“I’ve stopped killing old people and hoarding their bones”
When your evil brother in law is finally identified as the murder and your unfinished business is now completed
October 20, 2025 at 10:35 AM
When your evil brother in law is finally identified as the murder and your unfinished business is now completed
The fact that you’re talking to a divorce lawyer is probably #1
October 19, 2025 at 9:26 PM
The fact that you’re talking to a divorce lawyer is probably #1
A shark with fake tits :(
October 15, 2025 at 3:28 AM
A shark with fake tits :(
You call that serving?
September 8, 2025 at 12:45 AM
You call that serving?
My next event is reading from my book at The Next Big Thing, as part of @emergingwriters.bsky.social 😍
Every year the wheeler centre announces “the next big thing”, usually it’s Helen garner or labubus, but this year it’s me
Every year the wheeler centre announces “the next big thing”, usually it’s Helen garner or labubus, but this year it’s me
September 3, 2025 at 10:52 PM
My next event is reading from my book at The Next Big Thing, as part of @emergingwriters.bsky.social 😍
Every year the wheeler centre announces “the next big thing”, usually it’s Helen garner or labubus, but this year it’s me
Every year the wheeler centre announces “the next big thing”, usually it’s Helen garner or labubus, but this year it’s me
I was holding the stick here
August 25, 2025 at 6:38 AM
I was holding the stick here
