Maria 👑
perfectscars.bsky.social
Maria 👑
@perfectscars.bsky.social
Goblin | 🦂
Heys @ericbaudour.bsky.social National Air and Space Museum has stuff for ya boy
September 30, 2025 at 6:38 PM
It was so weird being in my apartment without Buddy last night. My mom took him to her house while I'm gone for a week so I know he's fine (prob beating up the dogs) but man it felt wrong without him there
September 25, 2025 at 9:57 AM
Tm to another tm on channel 2: can you bring me some aluminium (pronounced the British way)
Other tm: what's that?

Cue me cackling in the background
September 25, 2025 at 1:32 AM
mom going through a gift shop in Niagara Falls: There's so much maple syrup

me: yeah well they can't get the Stanley Cup back it's all they have left
August 10, 2025 at 2:09 AM
Can't wait to see my cat this weekend! Even though he just yells at me and knocks stuff on the floor
August 8, 2025 at 12:01 AM
me coming into work being told heys the plumbing techs will be here in an hour: okay np

5.5hrs later me: hey did anyone hear from the plumbing tech people?

me clocking out for meal: oh fun
August 5, 2025 at 12:22 AM
Well that was an eventful day...

Bat got in the building had to make that call.
Couldn't find a kid for long enough time I had to lock down the building.
Dumbass kids tried to ride bikes around the store 20 minutes before store closed.

And I still have tomorrow.
July 25, 2025 at 4:35 AM
my cat just carried a piece of Styrofoam into the bedroom

I have no idea where this piece of Styrofoam is from

someone come deal with him please
June 1, 2025 at 6:00 AM
Is it possible to make a tilt coaster but without inversions? Like I want the drop but no flippy over please
May 24, 2025 at 5:58 AM
Get you a mom that picks you up from the airport on Mother's Day and says "you're coming grocery shopping with me I forgot it's my turn to make food for library club tomorrow"
May 11, 2025 at 9:27 PM
@dabe.bsky.social @tychobrahe.bsky.social come down to the front lobby at the bcec for the big photo plzkthx
May 10, 2025 at 9:15 PM
Rose Pizza playing nonstop 80s bangers while we all eat pizza waiting for our late night trains home...

I gotta do this more often
April 24, 2025 at 3:02 AM
On the LIRR and I think we almost hit something or someone. Train laid on it's horn and did its best to slam on the breaks. No intersection nearby just woods.
Weird
April 23, 2025 at 8:54 PM
Reposted by Maria 👑
Toxicologist here! This will improve the health of zero Americans. Current synthetic food dyes are not causing health problems, and are often times used because they are actually safer than natural food dyes. Reminder that guns are the #1 cause of death of children but we are going to ban food dyes.
BREAKING: The FDA has officially announced they will be banning artificial dyes in the food supply by the end of 2026

This includes Red 40, Yellow 5, Yellow 6, Blue 1, Blue 2, Green 3
April 23, 2025 at 3:45 PM
I just bought one of those smart camera bird feeders

I love that this is how I live my life
April 1, 2025 at 5:39 AM
March 3, 2025 at 11:33 PM
Reposted by Maria 👑
You know who would taste terrible. Figment...atleast I think he would. He looks like his meat would be gamey...not that we are eating figment....anyways... wait till you hear this years secret Disney Snack exclusively at EPCOT!
February 25, 2025 at 7:29 PM
I'm not even a hair stylist but I watch hair fail vids and it hurts to watch people PULL AT THEIR NOODLE HAIR!! just put the brush down douse it in conditioner cover it with something leave it the fuck alone for like six hours don't touch it stop touching it for godd sake don't comb it or brush it
February 23, 2025 at 3:31 AM
Reposted by Maria 👑
Recorded a new Creepy Old Crypt episode this week and it’ll be up in the next few days! We ranked our favorite unnoticed theme park details, so expect it to be especially dorky
February 22, 2025 at 11:05 PM
Reposted by Maria 👑
I wanna call what Im doing
“BOWS FOR BOAS!”
But Luci is not a boa….
🎀🐍 🎀
Anyway! I still have bows and pins for sale! Getting ready to build her a bigger and better tank! I’m looking to build her a bio active enclosure, which is what I was originally working up to a few years ago. #ballpython
February 20, 2025 at 5:08 PM
Ultrasound tech was surprised how good I was at sitting perfectly still. I was like "30 tattoos will make you good at that"
February 21, 2025 at 6:47 PM
Can't sleep so I sent a reel to work friendo thinking he'll see it in the morning alas he's at the store bc a backroom cooler lost power
I can't with this building...
February 18, 2025 at 8:44 AM
"Is there gonna be any cheese?" - style tm
February 16, 2025 at 6:10 PM
"I don't want Joy, I want Sadness" - closing expert
February 16, 2025 at 3:24 AM
Quick screamy vent bc stupid people

STOP RIPPING YOUR SECOND SKIN OFF DRY
EITHER MOISTEN IT WITH A HOT DAMP TOWEL OR STEP IN THE SHOWER

this is why your tattoo is fucked up from the start. You probably went to a shitty overpriced artist who charged you for the design and that's messed up too
February 13, 2025 at 6:25 PM