RJ Bachler
@rjbachler.bsky.social
Been putzing around on the 'net since AOL 2.0 and a 14.4k modem. And still trying to figure it out.
The only thing I want for 2026 is this:
... For the love of fuck, COULD WE NOT DO THAT SHIT FROM LAST YEAR AGAIN?!? My mind/body/soul/heart/ect is so much toast right now that we all need a pause, so please pump the brakes.
... For the love of fuck, COULD WE NOT DO THAT SHIT FROM LAST YEAR AGAIN?!? My mind/body/soul/heart/ect is so much toast right now that we all need a pause, so please pump the brakes.
January 1, 2026 at 2:25 AM
The only thing I want for 2026 is this:
... For the love of fuck, COULD WE NOT DO THAT SHIT FROM LAST YEAR AGAIN?!? My mind/body/soul/heart/ect is so much toast right now that we all need a pause, so please pump the brakes.
... For the love of fuck, COULD WE NOT DO THAT SHIT FROM LAST YEAR AGAIN?!? My mind/body/soul/heart/ect is so much toast right now that we all need a pause, so please pump the brakes.
{if applicable} Have a (insert greeting here) (insert holiday here)! Gifts[∞]
If the code's buggy, we'll just slap it into a Bethesda game. ;p
If the code's buggy, we'll just slap it into a Bethesda game. ;p
December 24, 2025 at 8:17 PM
{if applicable} Have a (insert greeting here) (insert holiday here)! Gifts[∞]
If the code's buggy, we'll just slap it into a Bethesda game. ;p
If the code's buggy, we'll just slap it into a Bethesda game. ;p
"IT'S MERRY CHRI~"
Look, between Nov 22nd (earliest Thanksgiving can be) and Jan 1st there are over 40 different holidays. (Religious, secular, government, and so on.) Some of those move around too. So it is just easier to say "Happy Holidays" than trying to keep track.
And learn to share, mmkay?
Look, between Nov 22nd (earliest Thanksgiving can be) and Jan 1st there are over 40 different holidays. (Religious, secular, government, and so on.) Some of those move around too. So it is just easier to say "Happy Holidays" than trying to keep track.
And learn to share, mmkay?
December 4, 2025 at 4:19 PM
"IT'S MERRY CHRI~"
Look, between Nov 22nd (earliest Thanksgiving can be) and Jan 1st there are over 40 different holidays. (Religious, secular, government, and so on.) Some of those move around too. So it is just easier to say "Happy Holidays" than trying to keep track.
And learn to share, mmkay?
Look, between Nov 22nd (earliest Thanksgiving can be) and Jan 1st there are over 40 different holidays. (Religious, secular, government, and so on.) Some of those move around too. So it is just easier to say "Happy Holidays" than trying to keep track.
And learn to share, mmkay?
Prize for winning NNN: Relief from the "tension" on Dec 1st.
Consolation prize for losing NNN: You get to enjoy certain things again pretty much right then and there.
... Sometimes you have to lose to win. ;p
Consolation prize for losing NNN: You get to enjoy certain things again pretty much right then and there.
... Sometimes you have to lose to win. ;p
November 11, 2025 at 9:53 PM
Prize for winning NNN: Relief from the "tension" on Dec 1st.
Consolation prize for losing NNN: You get to enjoy certain things again pretty much right then and there.
... Sometimes you have to lose to win. ;p
Consolation prize for losing NNN: You get to enjoy certain things again pretty much right then and there.
... Sometimes you have to lose to win. ;p
... You know I'm right. ;p
November 1, 2025 at 1:39 AM
... You know I'm right. ;p
By Internet Law, I have to post this today.
youtu.be/Gs069dndIYk
youtu.be/Gs069dndIYk
Earth, Wind & Fire - September (Official HD Video)
YouTube video by EarthWindandFireVEVO
youtu.be
September 21, 2025 at 4:57 PM
By Internet Law, I have to post this today.
youtu.be/Gs069dndIYk
youtu.be/Gs069dndIYk
I just noticed... why does my desktop computer have an airplane mode? I'm fairly certain I'm not taking this on a 757 out of O'Hare anytime soon. ;p
September 2, 2025 at 5:48 PM
I just noticed... why does my desktop computer have an airplane mode? I'm fairly certain I'm not taking this on a 757 out of O'Hare anytime soon. ;p
I keep this neon green diskette for AOL Ver 2.5 (before they began offering 'X amount of free time' too!) under my monitor, as a reminder of everything in life starts somewhere.
So goodbye AOL dial-up, and thank you for starting me along this road.
So goodbye AOL dial-up, and thank you for starting me along this road.
August 15, 2025 at 12:18 PM
I keep this neon green diskette for AOL Ver 2.5 (before they began offering 'X amount of free time' too!) under my monitor, as a reminder of everything in life starts somewhere.
So goodbye AOL dial-up, and thank you for starting me along this road.
So goodbye AOL dial-up, and thank you for starting me along this road.
I brought my family to DC for the Cherry Blossom festival.
The first thing I saw when I exited the L'Enfant Metro was the Super Mutants and Enclave going at it. I slammed some RadAway, headed to the Lincoln Memorial, dropped off Abe's head and got my caps.
So forgive me if I doubt crime is down.
The first thing I saw when I exited the L'Enfant Metro was the Super Mutants and Enclave going at it. I slammed some RadAway, headed to the Lincoln Memorial, dropped off Abe's head and got my caps.
So forgive me if I doubt crime is down.
I brought my family to DC for the Cherry Blossom festival.
The first thing I saw when I exited the L'Enfant Plaza Metro was three Black people on the other side of the street. I involuntarily urinated in my pants. Soaked straight through, ruined.
So forgive me if I doubt that crime is down.
The first thing I saw when I exited the L'Enfant Plaza Metro was three Black people on the other side of the street. I involuntarily urinated in my pants. Soaked straight through, ruined.
So forgive me if I doubt that crime is down.
August 12, 2025 at 2:37 PM
I brought my family to DC for the Cherry Blossom festival.
The first thing I saw when I exited the L'Enfant Metro was the Super Mutants and Enclave going at it. I slammed some RadAway, headed to the Lincoln Memorial, dropped off Abe's head and got my caps.
So forgive me if I doubt crime is down.
The first thing I saw when I exited the L'Enfant Metro was the Super Mutants and Enclave going at it. I slammed some RadAway, headed to the Lincoln Memorial, dropped off Abe's head and got my caps.
So forgive me if I doubt crime is down.
docs.google.com/document/d/1...
I wrote most of this in Dec '24, with a bit of additions in Feb '25. I am apparently a bit off on the timeline.
I wrote most of this in Dec '24, with a bit of additions in Feb '25. I am apparently a bit off on the timeline.
FWI Trump Timeline
Early 2025: Trump starts his deportation policy. It goes as well as anyone can expect, with construction and landscaping in the cities taking the hit first, but farms seeing worse later in the year. E...
docs.google.com
August 11, 2025 at 5:10 PM
docs.google.com/document/d/1...
I wrote most of this in Dec '24, with a bit of additions in Feb '25. I am apparently a bit off on the timeline.
I wrote most of this in Dec '24, with a bit of additions in Feb '25. I am apparently a bit off on the timeline.
Since YouTube's AI age authentication will probably be as competent as it's algorithm, your best bet is to subscribe to stuff like the AARP channel and such. Watch as who it thinks is 60 is really 14! ;p
August 5, 2025 at 7:32 PM
Since YouTube's AI age authentication will probably be as competent as it's algorithm, your best bet is to subscribe to stuff like the AARP channel and such. Watch as who it thinks is 60 is really 14! ;p
"People are wondering what to do with Hulk Hogan's body now since it just used its creative control clause and refuses to be buried."
July 29, 2025 at 2:02 AM
"People are wondering what to do with Hulk Hogan's body now since it just used its creative control clause and refuses to be buried."
Yes, I've been a bad guy, been higher than the blue sky
And the truth is I don't wanna die an ordinary man
I've made mama cry, don't know why I'm still alive
Yes, the truth is I don't wanna die an ordinary man
Ozzy was NOT an ordinary man. And thank you Ozzy for never being ordinary. \m/
And the truth is I don't wanna die an ordinary man
I've made mama cry, don't know why I'm still alive
Yes, the truth is I don't wanna die an ordinary man
Ozzy was NOT an ordinary man. And thank you Ozzy for never being ordinary. \m/
July 22, 2025 at 9:28 PM
Yes, I've been a bad guy, been higher than the blue sky
And the truth is I don't wanna die an ordinary man
I've made mama cry, don't know why I'm still alive
Yes, the truth is I don't wanna die an ordinary man
Ozzy was NOT an ordinary man. And thank you Ozzy for never being ordinary. \m/
And the truth is I don't wanna die an ordinary man
I've made mama cry, don't know why I'm still alive
Yes, the truth is I don't wanna die an ordinary man
Ozzy was NOT an ordinary man. And thank you Ozzy for never being ordinary. \m/
... Is anyone really surprised? Ray Charles would've seen this shit coming.
My only question is what's the Vegas line on some serious shit dropping on the 13th-14th? Let's try to make some money off of this. ;p
My only question is what's the Vegas line on some serious shit dropping on the 13th-14th? Let's try to make some money off of this. ;p
June 6, 2025 at 1:49 AM
... Is anyone really surprised? Ray Charles would've seen this shit coming.
My only question is what's the Vegas line on some serious shit dropping on the 13th-14th? Let's try to make some money off of this. ;p
My only question is what's the Vegas line on some serious shit dropping on the 13th-14th? Let's try to make some money off of this. ;p
Right Brain: New platform, you can repeat the exact same birthday posts you did on other ones!
Left Brain: Most of the same people are here too, they'd notice.
Center Brain: But you can claim it's old age kicking in & you forgot.
Quite, the lot of you.
It's my 'oh, I'm fucking older again' day. :P
Left Brain: Most of the same people are here too, they'd notice.
Center Brain: But you can claim it's old age kicking in & you forgot.
Quite, the lot of you.
It's my 'oh, I'm fucking older again' day. :P
May 31, 2025 at 12:00 PM
Right Brain: New platform, you can repeat the exact same birthday posts you did on other ones!
Left Brain: Most of the same people are here too, they'd notice.
Center Brain: But you can claim it's old age kicking in & you forgot.
Quite, the lot of you.
It's my 'oh, I'm fucking older again' day. :P
Left Brain: Most of the same people are here too, they'd notice.
Center Brain: But you can claim it's old age kicking in & you forgot.
Quite, the lot of you.
It's my 'oh, I'm fucking older again' day. :P
People from Chicago KNOW about missions from God. :P
May 8, 2025 at 6:58 PM
People from Chicago KNOW about missions from God. :P
I heard it, a telltale sign of (soon-to-be) summer. I know he's somewhere on the block, going down it. I get up, run to the front porch and start looking around. And then it hits me...
I'm looking for the ice cream man and I'm almost 46.
... but I still want that Pink Panther ice cream bar.
I'm looking for the ice cream man and I'm almost 46.
... but I still want that Pink Panther ice cream bar.
April 25, 2025 at 12:35 AM
I heard it, a telltale sign of (soon-to-be) summer. I know he's somewhere on the block, going down it. I get up, run to the front porch and start looking around. And then it hits me...
I'm looking for the ice cream man and I'm almost 46.
... but I still want that Pink Panther ice cream bar.
I'm looking for the ice cream man and I'm almost 46.
... but I still want that Pink Panther ice cream bar.
Updated Easter tradition: Finding the eggs that are "getting too low in price."
April 19, 2025 at 12:38 PM
Updated Easter tradition: Finding the eggs that are "getting too low in price."
Before: That looks photoshopped.
Now: That looks like AI.
Eventually: That looks like AI photoshopped it.
Now: That looks like AI.
Eventually: That looks like AI photoshopped it.
March 24, 2025 at 9:47 PM
Before: That looks photoshopped.
Now: That looks like AI.
Eventually: That looks like AI photoshopped it.
Now: That looks like AI.
Eventually: That looks like AI photoshopped it.
I believe in climate change because I live in the Midwest. Our climate changes like every three hours.
February 25, 2025 at 7:20 PM
I believe in climate change because I live in the Midwest. Our climate changes like every three hours.
Age yourself with a movie you saw in the theater.
February 24, 2025 at 1:09 AM
Age yourself with a movie you saw in the theater.
I will say one thing about Trump, and it's this: He's probably the greatest con man to ever exist. Why?
The greatest con any con man can ever pull is to con the same people in the same way twice and pull it off.
The greatest con any con man can ever pull is to con the same people in the same way twice and pull it off.
February 15, 2025 at 12:55 PM
I will say one thing about Trump, and it's this: He's probably the greatest con man to ever exist. Why?
The greatest con any con man can ever pull is to con the same people in the same way twice and pull it off.
The greatest con any con man can ever pull is to con the same people in the same way twice and pull it off.
... Did someone forget to Venmo the refs today? ;p
February 10, 2025 at 2:52 AM
... Did someone forget to Venmo the refs today? ;p
Sometimes you need to get away from the doom posting. Here, have a snowy scene.
Left Logical Brain: "It's wet under that so it'll be slick as fu-"
NO. NO DOOM. Only snowy scene.
Left Logical Brain: "It's wet under that so it'll be slick as fu-"
NO. NO DOOM. Only snowy scene.
February 9, 2025 at 12:13 AM
Sometimes you need to get away from the doom posting. Here, have a snowy scene.
Left Logical Brain: "It's wet under that so it'll be slick as fu-"
NO. NO DOOM. Only snowy scene.
Left Logical Brain: "It's wet under that so it'll be slick as fu-"
NO. NO DOOM. Only snowy scene.
Pssst, hey. Hey. ... Heard your craving some of that sweet stuff. I got some. REAL sweet. No, don't ask about the hows, just I got it. The real question is how much. How much are you willing to spend to start you day off right...
Because you know those waffles are nasty dry. We both know.
Because you know those waffles are nasty dry. We both know.
February 1, 2025 at 11:18 PM
Pssst, hey. Hey. ... Heard your craving some of that sweet stuff. I got some. REAL sweet. No, don't ask about the hows, just I got it. The real question is how much. How much are you willing to spend to start you day off right...
Because you know those waffles are nasty dry. We both know.
Because you know those waffles are nasty dry. We both know.