@row-crow.bsky.social
I'm bad with computers, hate talking on the phone, and generally don't like people. So naturally, I got a job where I use a computer, and talk on the phone to people.
If your junk looks like an eggplant, you need to go the doctor.
December 21, 2025 at 1:18 PM
If your junk looks like an eggplant, you need to go the doctor.
Jack In The Box egg rolls are underrated.
December 4, 2025 at 1:12 AM
Jack In The Box egg rolls are underrated.
Why is it called a building if it's already built?
December 3, 2025 at 7:13 PM
Why is it called a building if it's already built?
Republicans in Congress: If you want to save face for the Midterms, don't resign. Impeach. Every Dem will vote for it. You only need a few R's in each Chamber. Sure, you'll lose MAGA loyalists, but Dems won't get them either. Meanwhile, you'll gain Independents, and maybe peel off a few Democrats.
November 29, 2025 at 5:48 PM
Republicans in Congress: If you want to save face for the Midterms, don't resign. Impeach. Every Dem will vote for it. You only need a few R's in each Chamber. Sure, you'll lose MAGA loyalists, but Dems won't get them either. Meanwhile, you'll gain Independents, and maybe peel off a few Democrats.
People always complain about spending Thanksgiving with family they can't stand, and I just don't get it. If you hate these people so much, why go? Why make yourself miserable on purpose? You can literally just stay home. The food can't be *that* good.
November 27, 2025 at 1:10 PM
People always complain about spending Thanksgiving with family they can't stand, and I just don't get it. If you hate these people so much, why go? Why make yourself miserable on purpose? You can literally just stay home. The food can't be *that* good.
How can Campbell's soup be food for poor people, if poor people can't afford it? Ramen is food for poor people.
November 26, 2025 at 2:01 PM
How can Campbell's soup be food for poor people, if poor people can't afford it? Ramen is food for poor people.
I think my cat thinks that the food in his bowl is all the food in the world, and if he eats at all, there won't be any more. He rarely eats all the food. He always leaves some in the bowl, and won't eat more until I put more in. Or pour it out on a table and call it "treats".
November 20, 2025 at 3:21 PM
I think my cat thinks that the food in his bowl is all the food in the world, and if he eats at all, there won't be any more. He rarely eats all the food. He always leaves some in the bowl, and won't eat more until I put more in. Or pour it out on a table and call it "treats".
Youtube: Stop trying to make me watch minute long ads for a mental disorder I do not have.
November 19, 2025 at 1:11 PM
Youtube: Stop trying to make me watch minute long ads for a mental disorder I do not have.
Dear Ghost Hunters: Don't go out looking for ghosts, then run away when you find some. If you're afraid of some doors opening, you're in the wrong business. Maybe take up needlepoint instead.
November 19, 2025 at 12:59 AM
Dear Ghost Hunters: Don't go out looking for ghosts, then run away when you find some. If you're afraid of some doors opening, you're in the wrong business. Maybe take up needlepoint instead.
Is it so wrong that I, an adult, would like my Alexa to speak like an adult? That means swearing sometimes. Why isn't there a setting for that?
November 16, 2025 at 9:22 PM
Is it so wrong that I, an adult, would like my Alexa to speak like an adult? That means swearing sometimes. Why isn't there a setting for that?
I feel very strongly that naming your kid after yourself is narcissistic, lazy and rude. Put in some fucking effort and give your kid their own identity.
November 16, 2025 at 9:19 PM
I feel very strongly that naming your kid after yourself is narcissistic, lazy and rude. Put in some fucking effort and give your kid their own identity.
Getting Allo installed today. Appt was for 12-2. They showed up at 11:49. Eat that other internet/cable providers.
November 14, 2025 at 4:55 PM
Getting Allo installed today. Appt was for 12-2. They showed up at 11:49. Eat that other internet/cable providers.
Trump is an awful human being, but with all the terrible things he's done, the one thing he hasn't done (yet) is fight for the right to arrest homeless people for being homeless. Y'know who did? Gavin fucking Newsom.
November 10, 2025 at 1:23 PM
Trump is an awful human being, but with all the terrible things he's done, the one thing he hasn't done (yet) is fight for the right to arrest homeless people for being homeless. Y'know who did? Gavin fucking Newsom.
Dear Rest of the World: Americans are not "obsessed" with ice. We like our cold drinks cold. Room temperature water is gross. Room temperature soda is awful. And room temperature beer is a crime against humanity. Ice makes these things good again. What's hard to understand about that?
November 10, 2025 at 12:09 AM
Dear Rest of the World: Americans are not "obsessed" with ice. We like our cold drinks cold. Room temperature water is gross. Room temperature soda is awful. And room temperature beer is a crime against humanity. Ice makes these things good again. What's hard to understand about that?
Hold on. If Grandpa Munster was Lily's dad, shouldn't his name be anything but Munster?
November 2, 2025 at 2:42 PM
Hold on. If Grandpa Munster was Lily's dad, shouldn't his name be anything but Munster?
Reposted
I'll tell you this much. If I ever run for office and they "leak" that I said Republicans are a bunch of fuckers, I will not retract it. I will say that I said it because Republicans are, indeed, a bunch of fuckers.
October 22, 2025 at 10:17 PM
I'll tell you this much. If I ever run for office and they "leak" that I said Republicans are a bunch of fuckers, I will not retract it. I will say that I said it because Republicans are, indeed, a bunch of fuckers.
Reposted
We need to renormalize calling stupid people "stupid". And I mean, as in their chosen inability to grasp a concept because of anti-intellectualism.
October 22, 2025 at 3:49 AM
We need to renormalize calling stupid people "stupid". And I mean, as in their chosen inability to grasp a concept because of anti-intellectualism.
Cat thinks he can help himself to treats by knocking the container onto the floor. Too bad for him it's a screw top and he doesn't have thumbs.
October 21, 2025 at 8:24 PM
Cat thinks he can help himself to treats by knocking the container onto the floor. Too bad for him it's a screw top and he doesn't have thumbs.
Reposted
It's funny that even in countries where they actually have kings, they're having a No Kings rally.
October 18, 2025 at 6:46 PM
It's funny that even in countries where they actually have kings, they're having a No Kings rally.
Just found out I'm severely allergic to weed, and I am right pissed off about it. A tiny hit yesterday afternoon, left me crying on floor for the better part of today. #fuckmylife
October 18, 2025 at 8:59 PM
Just found out I'm severely allergic to weed, and I am right pissed off about it. A tiny hit yesterday afternoon, left me crying on floor for the better part of today. #fuckmylife
Received my Special Election ballot today. Both the inner envelope and the outer envelope that I send my ballot back in were already sealed. Could not open without destroying the envelope. So fuck it. I'm not voting. Let 'em build their stupid jail.
October 16, 2025 at 12:50 AM
Received my Special Election ballot today. Both the inner envelope and the outer envelope that I send my ballot back in were already sealed. Could not open without destroying the envelope. So fuck it. I'm not voting. Let 'em build their stupid jail.
I have successfully snuck up on my cat. My life is complete.
October 15, 2025 at 12:42 AM
I have successfully snuck up on my cat. My life is complete.
Here's a novel idea (that would really piss off MAGA), make Black History its own class in High School. And make it required, just like World History and US History. As someone who graduated over half my life ago, it pisses me off that I have to learn these things from youtube and stand-up comics.
October 12, 2025 at 12:55 PM
Here's a novel idea (that would really piss off MAGA), make Black History its own class in High School. And make it required, just like World History and US History. As someone who graduated over half my life ago, it pisses me off that I have to learn these things from youtube and stand-up comics.
My cat is so averse to hugging, he will do anything I say if I follow it up with "Or I'll hug you."
October 11, 2025 at 1:05 AM
My cat is so averse to hugging, he will do anything I say if I follow it up with "Or I'll hug you."
Knowing how much I hate mayo but like grilled cheese sandwiches, hubs just went out of his way to tell me that restaurants use mayo instead of butter on the outside of the bread. #dickmove
October 6, 2025 at 11:45 PM
Knowing how much I hate mayo but like grilled cheese sandwiches, hubs just went out of his way to tell me that restaurants use mayo instead of butter on the outside of the bread. #dickmove