Sam Burns
@samrandomnumber.bsky.social
Playwright (Not the Worst Place, Paines Plough/Theatr Clwyd/Sherman Cymru 2014, Floor 13, Radio 4 afternoon drama, 2017). Kitchen assistant by day.
I love Val Pringle in Sapphire and Steel, cackling his way genially all over the shop, like he's stoned.
January 17, 2026 at 9:11 PM
I love Val Pringle in Sapphire and Steel, cackling his way genially all over the shop, like he's stoned.
Steel (as in Sapphire and) is so like Illya in his crotchetty brusqueness and lack of patience with traumatised children that it's very easy believed multi-dimensional time-rift stitching was what he went in for after leaving UNCLE.
January 15, 2026 at 9:43 PM
Steel (as in Sapphire and) is so like Illya in his crotchetty brusqueness and lack of patience with traumatised children that it's very easy believed multi-dimensional time-rift stitching was what he went in for after leaving UNCLE.
I have entered the varifocals stage of my life.
January 10, 2026 at 9:09 PM
I have entered the varifocals stage of my life.
I was an answer on Only Connect! People born in 1980 turned 45 in 2025 - 45 being the square root of 2025.
I wish someone had told me that last year.
I wish someone had told me that last year.
January 5, 2026 at 8:32 PM
I was an answer on Only Connect! People born in 1980 turned 45 in 2025 - 45 being the square root of 2025.
I wish someone had told me that last year.
I wish someone had told me that last year.
Reposted by Sam Burns
So it’s ok for a country to invade another country and kidnap its president? I hope that the rest of the world is paying attention. I have a president . . .
January 3, 2026 at 2:15 PM
So it’s ok for a country to invade another country and kidnap its president? I hope that the rest of the world is paying attention. I have a president . . .
I have to go to work tomorrow and I'd rather pierce my own septum with a spoon.
January 3, 2026 at 9:50 PM
I have to go to work tomorrow and I'd rather pierce my own septum with a spoon.
In other news, looks like somebody got new fighter jets for Christmas! 🙃
January 3, 2026 at 5:34 PM
In other news, looks like somebody got new fighter jets for Christmas! 🙃
Heating's back! The nice engineer came out on a day off to save us all from frostbite.
January 3, 2026 at 5:33 PM
Heating's back! The nice engineer came out on a day off to save us all from frostbite.
The central heating pump died yesterday morning with the snow thick on the ground and no engineers available to Monday and life at the moment let me tell me you is REALLY bracing.
January 3, 2026 at 7:55 AM
The central heating pump died yesterday morning with the snow thick on the ground and no engineers available to Monday and life at the moment let me tell me you is REALLY bracing.
Watching dinnerladies episode Minnelium, the only new year themed programme I have on DVD.
December 31, 2025 at 10:19 PM
Watching dinnerladies episode Minnelium, the only new year themed programme I have on DVD.
I'm struggling to find an anti-procrastination app that doesn't ultimately promise to turn into a procrastination tool.
December 31, 2025 at 9:38 PM
I'm struggling to find an anti-procrastination app that doesn't ultimately promise to turn into a procrastination tool.
Mother and I just sang 'Oh, What A Beauty' to an unusually well-upholstered lime.
December 31, 2025 at 3:56 PM
Mother and I just sang 'Oh, What A Beauty' to an unusually well-upholstered lime.
I feel very indignant about having to go back to work tomorrow.
December 27, 2025 at 10:03 PM
I feel very indignant about having to go back to work tomorrow.
Enjoying the traditional Boxing Day pancake (made from the leftover Yorkshire pudding batter) and the BBC's tribute to 2025's dead celebrities (I'd forgotten Marianne Faithful was this year...).
December 26, 2025 at 8:00 AM
Enjoying the traditional Boxing Day pancake (made from the leftover Yorkshire pudding batter) and the BBC's tribute to 2025's dead celebrities (I'd forgotten Marianne Faithful was this year...).
The King's Singers version of We Wish You A Merry Christmas really brings out the extortion threats.
December 25, 2025 at 8:08 AM
The King's Singers version of We Wish You A Merry Christmas really brings out the extortion threats.
I tied a tie today for the first time since 1996 (when my school uniform days ended) and I remembered how, so go me.
December 10, 2025 at 6:02 PM
I tied a tie today for the first time since 1996 (when my school uniform days ended) and I remembered how, so go me.
When I was a small child, I found the countertenors in the KIng's Singers rather scary, but as an adult I love them for being an ethereal window into the 17th century.
December 4, 2025 at 5:51 PM
When I was a small child, I found the countertenors in the KIng's Singers rather scary, but as an adult I love them for being an ethereal window into the 17th century.
Why does everyone need to go to the bathroom (next to my bedroom) during my weekly 45-minute video therapy session and then linger outside my door?
November 27, 2025 at 3:28 PM
Why does everyone need to go to the bathroom (next to my bedroom) during my weekly 45-minute video therapy session and then linger outside my door?
Got my first ever non-EU, non-burgandy-coloured passport today, and I do not like it.
November 21, 2025 at 4:57 PM
Got my first ever non-EU, non-burgandy-coloured passport today, and I do not like it.
I've just started CBT for anxiety after a seven-month wait and my current anxiety is mostly centred on CBT.
November 13, 2025 at 4:05 PM
I've just started CBT for anxiety after a seven-month wait and my current anxiety is mostly centred on CBT.
Hello Internet! I've finally been reconnected after a tedious five weeks and three days!
November 10, 2025 at 5:09 PM
Hello Internet! I've finally been reconnected after a tedious five weeks and three days!
I went to Ireland quite successfully.
October 22, 2025 at 8:35 PM
I went to Ireland quite successfully.
I'm the only person in Edinburgh Airport who knows where they're going and is keen to get there. Everyone else is turning in vague circles, humming distractedly, in the middle of all the walkways I need to use.
October 13, 2025 at 7:21 AM
I'm the only person in Edinburgh Airport who knows where they're going and is keen to get there. Everyone else is turning in vague circles, humming distractedly, in the middle of all the walkways I need to use.
I dreamt that the Bradley Whitford commander from The Handmaid's Tale moved in next door to me and he was a really good neighbour and I woke up feeling strange.
September 29, 2025 at 6:18 AM
I dreamt that the Bradley Whitford commander from The Handmaid's Tale moved in next door to me and he was a really good neighbour and I woke up feeling strange.
RIP Maru, the bestest cat on the internet.
September 17, 2025 at 6:23 PM
RIP Maru, the bestest cat on the internet.