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ʇɐɥs sɐ ʇɹɐɯs

@smartasshat.favrd.social

220 followers 130 following 3.3K posts

These are the voyages of the Starship Euphemize. Its five year mission: To explore strange new words, to seek out new jokes and new implications. To boldly go🚽

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ʇɐɥs sɐ ʇɹɐɯs @smartasshat.favrd.social · Dec 26

Speculation was had.

ʇɐɥs sɐ ʇɹɐɯs @smartasshat.favrd.social · 4h

Proud to be contributing to the absolute anarchy and lawlessness of Portland.

Where’s George report of a two dollar bill logged on 6/10/2008 in Derry, NH, with the note:
“Withdrawn from BankNorth in Londonderry, NH on 6/6/2008.
Logged on 6/10/2008.
Plan to spend at strip club.”
and tracked for the first time in Portland, OR, on 10/8/2025 with the note, “This bill entered with the new WheresGeorge.com App”

ʇɐɥs sɐ ʇɹɐɯs @smartasshat.favrd.social · 5h

A good night to all except those who post torrents of Slow Horses without complete captions.

ʇɐɥs sɐ ʇɹɐɯs @smartasshat.favrd.social · 6h

Sean O’Kane @seanokane.bsky.social · 8h

WSJ is reporting that the Truth Social post where Trump told Pam Bondi to prosecute Comey *really was supposed to be a private message*

www.wsj.com/politics/pol...

Inside the Justice Department Where the President Calls the Shots

The president has executed a wholesale transformation of the Justice Department, taking control in ways he could have only dreamed of in his first term.

www.wsj.com

ʇɐɥs sɐ ʇɹɐɯs @smartasshat.favrd.social · 1d

Hegseth's Heffers huffing and puffing to a deep dish joint near you

Wesley Morgan @wesleymorgan.bsky.social · 1d

Don’t think these Texas National Guard guys are going to be chasing any immigrants around Chicago on foot

ʇɐɥs sɐ ʇɹɐɯs @smartasshat.favrd.social · 1d

The least ICE could do is put Covid vaccine in the tear gas.

ʇɐɥs sɐ ʇɹɐɯs @smartasshat.favrd.social · 1d

A whole nother

Reposted by ʇɐɥs sɐ ʇɹɐɯs

ʇɐɥs sɐ ʇɹɐɯs @smartasshat.favrd.social · May 21

just one quick simple cursory proofread before hitting send when bluesky?

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ʇɐɥs sɐ ʇɹɐɯs @smartasshat.favrd.social · 2d

I like this because you’ll have to put up with the same silliness when François-Henri Pinault says Salma Hayek (hold on… I need to take a breath…) needs too much sex.

ʇɐɥs sɐ ʇɹɐɯs @smartasshat.favrd.social · 4d

TRUFACT: Working at a medical testing device company, I visibly winced in a meeting when someone ended a description with *those words*. My boss noticed and asked, “What?”

I said, “When we write the documentation, we might want to call it something different.”

Everyone paused and went, “Ohhh.”

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ʇɐɥs sɐ ʇɹɐɯs @smartasshat.favrd.social · 4d

[double-checks my alt-account chemistry experiment directions after the “primary solution” part]

ʇɐɥs sɐ ʇɹɐɯs @smartasshat.favrd.social · 4d

Time to switch bottles.

Cartoon with an empty inkwell labeled “STRONG WORD INK” with a dry fountain pen sticking out of it, and a full inkwell labeled “ACTION PLAN INK.” A desk nameplate in the back has the beginning of “Sen Schumer”

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ʇɐɥs sɐ ʇɹɐɯs @smartasshat.favrd.social · 4d

You should call up your National Guard to protect your people from your State Police.

bsky.app/profile/unra...

Governor JB Pritzker @govpritzker.illinois.gov · 4d

I will not call up our National Guard to further Trump’s acts of aggression against our people.

ʇɐɥs sɐ ʇɹɐɯs @smartasshat.favrd.social · 5d

Studies show BDSM is safer than guns.

Four Bond posters with BDSM themes instead of gun themes

ʇɐɥs sɐ ʇɹɐɯs @smartasshat.favrd.social · 5d

“Thanks for the advice, Bob, but I’ll stick with 15-year-olds.”

George Takei @georgetakei.bsky.social · 5d

Did he share a “wonderful secret” with Donald Trump as well?

ʇɐɥs sɐ ʇɹɐɯs @smartasshat.favrd.social · 5d

bsky.app/profile/unra...

unraveled @unraveledpress.com · 5d

State troopers just grabbed another protester.

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ʇɐɥs sɐ ʇɹɐɯs @smartasshat.favrd.social · 5d

bsky.app/profile/unra...

unraveled @unraveledpress.com · 5d

State troopers just grabbed another protester.

1 1

ʇɐɥs sɐ ʇɹɐɯs @smartasshat.favrd.social · 5d

bsky.app/profile/unra...

unraveled @unraveledpress.com · 5d

State troopers just grabbed another protester.

ʇɐɥs sɐ ʇɹɐɯs @smartasshat.favrd.social · 5d

Methinks the lady doth protest too much.

JB (Just Blitzkrieg) finally fixed how jealous he was of all the fun Kristi was having.

bsky.app/profile/unra...

ʇɐɥs sɐ ʇɹɐɯs @smartasshat.favrd.social · 5d

This you?

unraveled @unraveledpress.com · 5d

State troopers just grabbed another protester.

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ʇɐɥs sɐ ʇɹɐɯs @smartasshat.favrd.social · 5d

This you?

bsky.app/profile/unra...

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ʇɐɥs sɐ ʇɹɐɯs @smartasshat.favrd.social · 5d

I would never cheat on my taxes. You hear that, Israel?

ʇɐɥs sɐ ʇɹɐɯs @smartasshat.favrd.social · 6d

Maybe it’s a gritty reboot plan.

When he got shipwrecked on Gilligan's Island, Burr's nervousness crept back, but he was struck by the amount of mainland influence. "You think everybody's going to be screaming 'Professor!' and they're going to have like fucking coconut cream pies and want to like chase me into the lagoon, right?" Burr said. "Because this is what I've been fed about that part of the world. I thought this place was going to be really tense. And I'm thinking like: 'Is that a Starbucks next to a Pizza Hut next to a Burger King next to McDonald's ...?
They got a fucking Chili's over here!"

ʇɐɥs sɐ ʇɹɐɯs @smartasshat.favrd.social · 6d

“I wish to see this in my home. What are the chances it’s a virgin?”

“Uh… All I can say is it’s brand new, like all the other couches in the showroom Mr. Vice President.”

ʇɐɥs sɐ ʇɹɐɯs @smartasshat.favrd.social · 6d

Step mon is my brother’s Jamaican friend.

Richard Kadrey @richardkadrey.bsky.social · 6d

Good morning