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squidpizza
@squidpizza.art
2.8K followers 2.7K following 8.3K posts
I'm squidpizza (25). I do all sorts of art, most of it is gay and stupid. This account is NSFW, and I'm liable to share pictures of bugs. This pfp was drawn by @beanieboirufus.bsky.social.

Give me money at https://www.patreon.com/squidpizza
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Appreciate my dragon. Maybe if it’s sufficiently quirky and funny I will answer in character as if it’s an actual AMA, that’s the kind of thing he would do.
Get to know my OC. Reply with a question about this OC. Midas, a Guzzlord gijinka and streamer, sitting in a beanbag chair and holding a controller
January 16, 2026 at 11:30 PM
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what do i win
January 15, 2026 at 11:05 PM
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You have my.. you have my s… you have my se… you have my eel of approval
January 15, 2026 at 6:00 PM
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My latest big project is going extremely well

#mtgcommander #magicthegathering #commander #salamander #selesnya #pleasesavemefrommydigitalprison
A simple drawing of an olm (a type of blind cave salamander) that has been colored green and given ribbons and gold accessories. The caption says “this is my fanart of emmara tandris if she was an olm (original by cray0n-b0x on tumblr)”
January 14, 2026 at 6:50 PM
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For #pornfolioday some snippets of writing I am proud of for other reasons.
Noah drank the entire glass in one single gulp, then handed it back to Tommy. “I think I need to focus on how it feels or I’m gonna have a panic attack.” Noah tried to get up, fell, was caught by Tommy for the second time that night. The not-quite satyr yelped and sat back down on the bed. “Oh, fuck, that’s weird,” Noah said. “I can feel myself learning how to walk on hooves. Fuck, that’s really weird. And, whoah, that’s weird.” Noah put a hand to his forehead, like he was trying to assuage a migraine. “I’m gay now,” he said matter-of-factly. “What?” Tommy asked. “I literally just felt my brain… rewire itself, okay?” Noah said. “Don’t ask me how it works. I just… know.” “You can’t just… turn gay. That’s not how it works.” Tommy said. “Yeah, well, I’m not supposed to turn into half of a goat, so that’s two things that should be impossible.” His heart race is increasing. He is here willingly; all tithes are; but he is still a human, and he knows that he is not the apex predator here. He fears for his life; his heart and mind bound by his traitorous flesh. Like we all are. I step closer until we are almost touching, and put a hand on his shoulder. “You are brave for coming here,” I whisper into his ear. “I… I know you won’t hurt me.” I smile, flashing fangs, and I meet his eyes again. “No, I will certainly hurt you, dear Kinnan. But only as much as I need to.” I circle around so that I’m facing the back of his neck. “Your emperor thanks you for your service.” Before Kinnan can respond I bite into his neck, holding him against my chest. The blood he gives me, nay, the blood I take from him fills me with vigor and warmth no other meal could ever match. Cecil stopped staring, and then realized that he had been. “So you’ve, ah, made love to many men?” Marcus saw an opportunity to impress Cecil and took it. He laughed, a hearty, booming laugh that practically shook the room. “I don’t make love, my mate. I fuck. I breed. Making love is for men, and I am a beast!” Marcus tilted his face up and put a fist to his chest proudly as he delivered this practiced spiel. He then looked down at Cecil, who looked like he was either going to piss his pants or possibly ejaculate unassisted. The line never failed in doing one of those two things. “Oh,” Cecil said, his eyes locked with Marcus’, “Okay.” It had stolen its trainer’s underwear to sniff it. It had used its long, slick tongue to, to, Samson couldn’t finish the thought. He had read the entire story. Not because he had liked it, but because it had reflected his experiences better than anyone else’s. If anyone understood him, it was that trainer in the story. That fictional trainer in that made-up story, because it was obviously not true. Pokemon didn’t fuck their trainers. That didn’t happen. Sure, some people fantasized about it, like whoever had written that story, but that’s all it was, wasn’t it? A story that weirdos got off to? Samson had not gotten off to the story, because he was normal. He was a normal guy who thought about his Obstagoon fucking him the normal amount, which was very very little.
January 13, 2026 at 9:14 PM
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For #portfolioday some snippets of writing I am particularly proud of.
The limp body of the man whose name didn’t matter was pushed off the deck of the airship and into the mechanical jungle of Mars. The razor-tipped edges of solar leaves cut at his flesh as he fell, the pain only barely registering compared to his other injuries. He landed with an awful crack at the base of a turbine tree, head tilted up to look at the stormy sky. It was always stormy on Mars. “You’re naked,” said the demon, brushing sand from his hardening shell. “So are you,” replied the angel, whose pale, nacre-like flesh had mottled spots like a cowrie shell. “What’s my name, again?” “Ozymandias,” the demon said, knowing it to be true. “But everyone just calls you Ozzy.” “Has a nice ring to it. Your name is Basil, by the way,” Ozzy said, a hand to his chin like he was lost in thought. “Like the herb?” Basil asked, taken slightly aback. “No,” said Ozzy. “Like the monster. You know, the basilisk?” “That’s so much worse actually,” said Basil, flatly. I open the pack of cards before we even get home, reading them by the flicker of orange streetlights. I sift through them with fresh eyes and endless curiosity. The numbers are meaningless except as trivia. Wailord has 200 HP? Sure, why not. But each little drawing is a window into a better world. Where being obsessed with bugs and dinosaurs and strange little creatures at the bottom of the sea is not only tolerated, it is celebrated. Where you don’t have to hide the parts of yourself that you want to share most just to pretend to have friends. Where the most important talent of all is empathy for the strange and inhuman. Where the world makes sense. Where I can belong. That’s where I belong. The orchid’s central petals darkened and folded to show an approximate outline of… something. It was like an optical illusion, where once you saw it at the right angle, you knew what it was. A head, Will realized, and it now felt obvious. Not a human head, something angular and canine. A hyena, maybe, what Will would call a gnoll. A pair of yellow stamen approximated squinting eyes. “I’m sorry, mister…” Will prompted. “It’s doctor Skullfuck Bonecrusher,” said doctor Skullfuck Bonecrusher. “I’m not calling you that,” said Will. “Do you have something… shorter?” Doctor Skullfuck Bonecrusher scoffed indignantly. “I refuse to have my genius go unacknowledged. I earned my doctorate, and I will have it recognized!” “Can I call you doctor Skullcrusher?” Doctor Skullfuck Bonecrusher considered this. “Very well. Doctor Skullcrusher, then.”
January 13, 2026 at 8:56 PM
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So, in 2022 wotc released the pride secret lair. It included this card. It is by far the most controversial card in the entire set. In 2024, there was a person in the magic the gathering server I frequent. She talked about how much the card disgusted her. How sickening she found it.
The pride secret lair version of the card bearscape, a 3 mana green enchantment that allows you to make 2/2 bear tokens. It depicts several fat gay men (“bears”) lounging in a hot spring.
January 13, 2026 at 11:15 AM
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princess daisy holding a gun. the caption says "I do not support all gay men. Some of you bitches are very Transphobic."
January 11, 2026 at 11:16 PM
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gongrats on 3k!
January 10, 2026 at 8:05 PM
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"The worst part of being a werewolf is no chocolate. D'you have any idea what it's like to have something you just know would bad for you dangling right in front of you, but it's just sooooo tempting?"

"knotmeyoufuckingimbicile. I mean yeah."

"What?"

"What?"
A fat werewolf with pink highlights in his hair, his pubes, and his tail inspects a brownie. His half erect, canine cock, complete with knot, is fully exposed.
January 8, 2026 at 4:19 AM
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"The worst part of being a werewolf is no chocolate. D'you have any idea what it's like to have something you just know would bad for you dangling right in front of you, but it's just sooooo tempting?"

"We've been best friends since middle school, so yeah."

"What?"

"What?"

(knot version below)
A fat werewolf with pink highlights in his hair, his pubes, and his tail inspects a brownie. His half erect, humanlike cock is out.
January 8, 2026 at 4:19 AM
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(they will end up on a digital custom magic token so something like this)
A 2/2 white Soldier creature token with vigilance. This specific variant depicts a Boros legionnaire. a 1/1 black and green Pest creature token with "When this token dies, you gain 1 life." It looks like a grub or caterpillar, and is designed to be ugly-cute.
January 6, 2026 at 8:26 AM
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I hope the quality of this image degrades into unreadability
Artists !! Post this and let your followers tell you what they want to see more from you
January 5, 2026 at 5:55 AM
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the erlking never runs, for if he pursues you on foot he has no need to. the erlking never stops, for his hunt itself sustains him. he needs no track or scent or spoor to find his quarry, for he always knows exactly where it is. he is neither man nor beast but something older, so old, so very old.
A knight-like figure, the Erlking, draped in a green cape with a white fur trim. He is standing in a snowy forest which has been rendered in black and white.
January 5, 2026 at 5:32 AM
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hes aliiiiiiiive. he's aliiiiiiiiiiiiiiiive
January 4, 2026 at 8:47 PM
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every day he becomes more and more real. i fear the day he attempts to take over
the cuboid head of a minecraft skin, depicting Midas the guzzlord gijinka and streamer
January 4, 2026 at 6:58 PM
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Video of me deepthroating a werewolf dildo ok
January 3, 2026 at 10:07 PM
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yeah
January 2, 2026 at 12:04 AM
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last piece of the year, and what better than to end off the year of the dragon with a dragon?
Lee, a malachite dragon in human form. He is holding Dice by the horn and the tail, and fucking him anally
January 1, 2026 at 2:18 AM
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Tumblr post from user bungerc0re that says venison is so fucking good we should kill and eat more beautiful creatures
December 31, 2025 at 9:09 PM
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a sea pig and a tripod fish toasting to the new years. The caption says "Its been one of those years... pass the yaoi!!!"
December 31, 2025 at 6:03 PM
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Although his preferred coloration is flat black (and is the easiest to draw) Loki can display whatever he wants on his avatar. When he's resting, he likes looping images of nature as his "screensaver"
December 30, 2025 at 8:49 PM
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Work on Loki's expressions. As an avatar of a vast organic computer system, Loki's face is 2d and malleable. I imagine when he expresses emotions, it sounds like an animal crossing character.

Because his tools for interfacing with the real world are limited, he has lots of times to refine his look.
December 30, 2025 at 8:40 PM
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i still think of him fondly and often
December 30, 2025 at 6:52 PM
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art vs artist. you will not see my face again until the end of next year so enjoy it while you can
Eight drawings and my face. The drawings are, going clockwise from top left, an angel, a demon, a layer cake, a twitch streamer, three black cryptids, a squid fakemon, a priest, and a martian orc
December 30, 2025 at 9:03 AM