I’m so old, at my first job I was once sent down to Heathrow Airport to collect a set of presentation slides created in London and bring them back to Glasgow.
I think if slides were still so rare and expensive to achieve, we’d all be a lot happier.

“From this moment on, all agents are now James Bond 007” - David Niven, Casino Royale (the version that’s actually fun)

Wild suggestion here, but maybe they could just… ignore it?
Was Craig’s Bond married to Contessa Teresa?
How many times has Bond met Blofeld for the first time?
Just wipe the slate clean, like they pretty much do every time.

The apparently self-aware buses that declare "I'm not in service" scare me. Even more so the delusional ones that say "I'm a train, choo-choo!"

I spat out my second breakfast reading this.

I do miss those classes in the 1970s where the teacher would wheel in the ornate Victorian TV trolley and the Crank Monitor would turn the handle so we could watch the flickering zoetrope of Isla StClair singing songs about our glorious Empire.

Many of us are thicker round the bottom. There’s no shame in it.

Next time someone wishes me a nice day I’m going to aggressively reply “No, YOU have a nice day!”. Possibly with a finger point.
(Edited 8:56 via @skeetsapp.com)

Sorry, that should be “f@@k cultural coherence”.

Not big on automatic, blind cohesion either, mind you.

As long as it wasn’t Julian of Norwich’s famous saying. Someone might have shoved you down…

Excavating a 13th C well in a Cathedral close to Hallowe’en. Sounds good to me, what could possibly go wrong?

when people get stabbed at a synagogue just for being jewish then antisemitism is a stain on society that must be eradicated, but when a trans girl is stabbed just for being trans then it’s because phones are bad

*looks at tomorrow’s to-do list*
Mwahahahahahahahah!
(Aaaarrr)

Oh it probably is. I think the last time I heard about it, it was down south for that bloke whatsisname, used to be into The Goons, to sit on. Didn’t realise he’d sent it back.