Kate schwagnerbutt
@swagglebutt.bsky.social
Charmstrangecrochet.etsy.com
Linktr.ee/charmandstrange
Linktr.ee/charmandstrange
Pinned
Shit my husband says while playing video games that sounds unhinged out of context: 📌 a running thread for our entertainment
Lmao mods being unhinged yet again
I tried to comment in the wedding dress subreddit "I had a similarly underwhelming experience." I couldn't post the word underwhelming bc it got flagged as "don't be mean about dresses" 🤣
Changed to "disappointing" and my comment still has to be reviewed manually
I tried to comment in the wedding dress subreddit "I had a similarly underwhelming experience." I couldn't post the word underwhelming bc it got flagged as "don't be mean about dresses" 🤣
Changed to "disappointing" and my comment still has to be reviewed manually
January 21, 2026 at 3:33 PM
Lmao mods being unhinged yet again
I tried to comment in the wedding dress subreddit "I had a similarly underwhelming experience." I couldn't post the word underwhelming bc it got flagged as "don't be mean about dresses" 🤣
Changed to "disappointing" and my comment still has to be reviewed manually
I tried to comment in the wedding dress subreddit "I had a similarly underwhelming experience." I couldn't post the word underwhelming bc it got flagged as "don't be mean about dresses" 🤣
Changed to "disappointing" and my comment still has to be reviewed manually
Why tf is every bra ad on Insta being like "my boobs aged faster than I did!" "my boobs are so saggy!"
STOP. IT. Bottom-heavy breasts are a valid shape. Mine have been this way since I was 12!!! They're not "saggy," I haven't lost elasticity. My breast tissue is mostly at the bottoms is all.
STOP. IT. Bottom-heavy breasts are a valid shape. Mine have been this way since I was 12!!! They're not "saggy," I haven't lost elasticity. My breast tissue is mostly at the bottoms is all.
January 19, 2026 at 6:11 PM
Why tf is every bra ad on Insta being like "my boobs aged faster than I did!" "my boobs are so saggy!"
STOP. IT. Bottom-heavy breasts are a valid shape. Mine have been this way since I was 12!!! They're not "saggy," I haven't lost elasticity. My breast tissue is mostly at the bottoms is all.
STOP. IT. Bottom-heavy breasts are a valid shape. Mine have been this way since I was 12!!! They're not "saggy," I haven't lost elasticity. My breast tissue is mostly at the bottoms is all.
Mark, reading the text in a trailer for a video game: "burn the witches."
Me, not looking at the trailer: "I don't wanna. I'll join the witches."
Me, not looking at the trailer: "I don't wanna. I'll join the witches."
January 16, 2026 at 12:13 AM
Mark, reading the text in a trailer for a video game: "burn the witches."
Me, not looking at the trailer: "I don't wanna. I'll join the witches."
Me, not looking at the trailer: "I don't wanna. I'll join the witches."
My husband supporting me by watching the tutorial video I uploaded to YouTube less than an hour ago: 10/10 thank u 🥹🥰😘
..... But he did it on our living room TV so I had to hear my voice in Dolby surround sound: 3/10 whyyyyy 🙈🙉
(it averages to 9/10 I love this man more than I dislike my voice)
..... But he did it on our living room TV so I had to hear my voice in Dolby surround sound: 3/10 whyyyyy 🙈🙉
(it averages to 9/10 I love this man more than I dislike my voice)
January 14, 2026 at 11:27 PM
My husband supporting me by watching the tutorial video I uploaded to YouTube less than an hour ago: 10/10 thank u 🥹🥰😘
..... But he did it on our living room TV so I had to hear my voice in Dolby surround sound: 3/10 whyyyyy 🙈🙉
(it averages to 9/10 I love this man more than I dislike my voice)
..... But he did it on our living room TV so I had to hear my voice in Dolby surround sound: 3/10 whyyyyy 🙈🙉
(it averages to 9/10 I love this man more than I dislike my voice)
I am blessed to have been able to spend a lot of time with my friends this weekend and also quite annoyed at how many of them have shaky legs that shake the whole damn couch and/or table 😭 sit tf still or at least lean away from the table so I'm not jiggled w u
January 4, 2026 at 3:46 AM
I am blessed to have been able to spend a lot of time with my friends this weekend and also quite annoyed at how many of them have shaky legs that shake the whole damn couch and/or table 😭 sit tf still or at least lean away from the table so I'm not jiggled w u
Someone ordered a mati bookmark from my Etsy shop and they have the Greekest name I've ever seen from one of my customers 😊🇬🇷 Nai, morí!
January 2, 2026 at 5:10 PM
Someone ordered a mati bookmark from my Etsy shop and they have the Greekest name I've ever seen from one of my customers 😊🇬🇷 Nai, morí!
Mark: "They have it on Amazon, but I mean, it's Amazon."
Me: "Ugh."
Friend: "What's wrong with Amazon?"
Mark & me: "It's Amazon."
Friend: "Oh, that's fair."
Me: "Ugh."
Friend: "What's wrong with Amazon?"
Mark & me: "It's Amazon."
Friend: "Oh, that's fair."
December 30, 2025 at 5:42 AM
Mark: "They have it on Amazon, but I mean, it's Amazon."
Me: "Ugh."
Friend: "What's wrong with Amazon?"
Mark & me: "It's Amazon."
Friend: "Oh, that's fair."
Me: "Ugh."
Friend: "What's wrong with Amazon?"
Mark & me: "It's Amazon."
Friend: "Oh, that's fair."
My mom only had time & budget for Christmas gifts for her grandkids this year. My husband & I are childfree and she bought some new toys for our cat 🥰👏🎄😸
December 26, 2025 at 3:33 AM
My mom only had time & budget for Christmas gifts for her grandkids this year. My husband & I are childfree and she bought some new toys for our cat 🥰👏🎄😸
Attention offices that tend to get a lot of calls and have a hold service:
You really, really don't need to repeat the "our call volume is high" message every 30 seconds. I get it. I'd rather listen to your smooth jazz music for a few minutes at a time, thanks.
You really, really don't need to repeat the "our call volume is high" message every 30 seconds. I get it. I'd rather listen to your smooth jazz music for a few minutes at a time, thanks.
December 18, 2025 at 8:40 PM
Attention offices that tend to get a lot of calls and have a hold service:
You really, really don't need to repeat the "our call volume is high" message every 30 seconds. I get it. I'd rather listen to your smooth jazz music for a few minutes at a time, thanks.
You really, really don't need to repeat the "our call volume is high" message every 30 seconds. I get it. I'd rather listen to your smooth jazz music for a few minutes at a time, thanks.
Remember, friends: clothing made from "recycled polyester" is STILL PLASTIC CLOTHING. It's gonna be hot, sweaty, drape poorly, and look cheap & shitty after a season or 2 just as badly as clothes made from new polyester. It's not environmentally friendly if it can't be repaired after years of wear.
December 10, 2025 at 4:40 PM
Remember, friends: clothing made from "recycled polyester" is STILL PLASTIC CLOTHING. It's gonna be hot, sweaty, drape poorly, and look cheap & shitty after a season or 2 just as badly as clothes made from new polyester. It's not environmentally friendly if it can't be repaired after years of wear.
U ever just minding ur business when a giant chunk of dust falls off the ceiling fan and reminds u to clean 🤣
December 5, 2025 at 4:53 PM
U ever just minding ur business when a giant chunk of dust falls off the ceiling fan and reminds u to clean 🤣
Why the FUCK does health care get to decide that 3 months after an appointment, I still owe money?
The US health care system is such a fucking joke designed to let as many people as possible either drown in debt or just die. Burn the whole system to the ground.
The US health care system is such a fucking joke designed to let as many people as possible either drown in debt or just die. Burn the whole system to the ground.
December 5, 2025 at 2:47 PM
Why the FUCK does health care get to decide that 3 months after an appointment, I still owe money?
The US health care system is such a fucking joke designed to let as many people as possible either drown in debt or just die. Burn the whole system to the ground.
The US health care system is such a fucking joke designed to let as many people as possible either drown in debt or just die. Burn the whole system to the ground.
I feel like every time I get a political spam text and respond "End," they sign me up for 3 other lists.
Oddly, I got almost zero texts before November's election. Now I'm getting flooded almost daily w random candidates asking for money in states I've never visited. Why do u need money rn???
Oddly, I got almost zero texts before November's election. Now I'm getting flooded almost daily w random candidates asking for money in states I've never visited. Why do u need money rn???
December 3, 2025 at 12:18 AM
I feel like every time I get a political spam text and respond "End," they sign me up for 3 other lists.
Oddly, I got almost zero texts before November's election. Now I'm getting flooded almost daily w random candidates asking for money in states I've never visited. Why do u need money rn???
Oddly, I got almost zero texts before November's election. Now I'm getting flooded almost daily w random candidates asking for money in states I've never visited. Why do u need money rn???
Clothing companies be like "we offer a neutral palette so you can wear our clothes to the office!" and everything is black, cream, grey, brown.
Then
"We have colors now for a little fun! 🙂" and it's a faded blue-toned grey, sage green, and pink so soft it's barely pink
WHY R U ALLERGIC TO COLOR 😭
Then
"We have colors now for a little fun! 🙂" and it's a faded blue-toned grey, sage green, and pink so soft it's barely pink
WHY R U ALLERGIC TO COLOR 😭
December 1, 2025 at 8:11 PM
Clothing companies be like "we offer a neutral palette so you can wear our clothes to the office!" and everything is black, cream, grey, brown.
Then
"We have colors now for a little fun! 🙂" and it's a faded blue-toned grey, sage green, and pink so soft it's barely pink
WHY R U ALLERGIC TO COLOR 😭
Then
"We have colors now for a little fun! 🙂" and it's a faded blue-toned grey, sage green, and pink so soft it's barely pink
WHY R U ALLERGIC TO COLOR 😭
Apparently I am a bully for saying that people who aren't interested in selling their crocheted goods for a profit don't belong in a group called "Crochet for Vendors." lolwut WHY are people so damn sensitive 🤣
November 30, 2025 at 6:15 AM
Apparently I am a bully for saying that people who aren't interested in selling their crocheted goods for a profit don't belong in a group called "Crochet for Vendors." lolwut WHY are people so damn sensitive 🤣
When someone posts in a big group on social media, and then when they get a response they don't like they say "mind your business"
Honey you made it anyone's business by posting in a group, just because you disagree with someone doesn't mean they're being rude by sharing their thoughts 🤣
Honey you made it anyone's business by posting in a group, just because you disagree with someone doesn't mean they're being rude by sharing their thoughts 🤣
November 24, 2025 at 6:01 PM
When someone posts in a big group on social media, and then when they get a response they don't like they say "mind your business"
Honey you made it anyone's business by posting in a group, just because you disagree with someone doesn't mean they're being rude by sharing their thoughts 🤣
Honey you made it anyone's business by posting in a group, just because you disagree with someone doesn't mean they're being rude by sharing their thoughts 🤣
Today's set is such a skeleton crew that I'm running audio as well as script supervising. I keep forgetting to cut audio, and once I forgot to roll it 😶🫥
Indie film is far from graceful lmao
Indie film is far from graceful lmao
November 23, 2025 at 8:53 PM
Today's set is such a skeleton crew that I'm running audio as well as script supervising. I keep forgetting to cut audio, and once I forgot to roll it 😶🫥
Indie film is far from graceful lmao
Indie film is far from graceful lmao
Some people are really hating on cropped sweaters in a semi-viral post and I'm over here like cropped sweaters are just good length sweaters on me. I have so little torso vertically. Please don't be mad at ppl who rely on cropped clothes to just fit normally. 😭
November 21, 2025 at 12:47 AM
Some people are really hating on cropped sweaters in a semi-viral post and I'm over here like cropped sweaters are just good length sweaters on me. I have so little torso vertically. Please don't be mad at ppl who rely on cropped clothes to just fit normally. 😭
My bff to a girl at the club: "I love your top!"
Girl: "Thanks, it's from Shein!"
bff to me, later: "When girls say their clothes are from Shein I want to tell them I don't like it anymore."
Aaaand this is just 1 of a billion reasons we're friends 😂
Girl: "Thanks, it's from Shein!"
bff to me, later: "When girls say their clothes are from Shein I want to tell them I don't like it anymore."
Aaaand this is just 1 of a billion reasons we're friends 😂
November 21, 2025 at 12:06 AM
My bff to a girl at the club: "I love your top!"
Girl: "Thanks, it's from Shein!"
bff to me, later: "When girls say their clothes are from Shein I want to tell them I don't like it anymore."
Aaaand this is just 1 of a billion reasons we're friends 😂
Girl: "Thanks, it's from Shein!"
bff to me, later: "When girls say their clothes are from Shein I want to tell them I don't like it anymore."
Aaaand this is just 1 of a billion reasons we're friends 😂
How the FUCK did I, a registered Democrat but really a progressive democratic socialist, who has donated to Leftist politicians and charities, get on the email list for the fucking Heritage Foundation???
Someone must've sold them my info. No way do I belong to anything parallel. 🤮
Someone must've sold them my info. No way do I belong to anything parallel. 🤮
November 11, 2025 at 3:17 PM
How the FUCK did I, a registered Democrat but really a progressive democratic socialist, who has donated to Leftist politicians and charities, get on the email list for the fucking Heritage Foundation???
Someone must've sold them my info. No way do I belong to anything parallel. 🤮
Someone must've sold them my info. No way do I belong to anything parallel. 🤮
Man oh man does V For Vendetta hit differently post Covid and during Trump's second term.
November 6, 2025 at 2:25 AM
Man oh man does V For Vendetta hit differently post Covid and during Trump's second term.
I didn't think I was the parasocial type
But the other night I had a dream that @cakejumper.bsky.social personally called my cell phone to make sure I'd catch her stream later that day
???
I don't even participate in chat 🤣
But the other night I had a dream that @cakejumper.bsky.social personally called my cell phone to make sure I'd catch her stream later that day
???
I don't even participate in chat 🤣
November 5, 2025 at 1:48 PM
I didn't think I was the parasocial type
But the other night I had a dream that @cakejumper.bsky.social personally called my cell phone to make sure I'd catch her stream later that day
???
I don't even participate in chat 🤣
But the other night I had a dream that @cakejumper.bsky.social personally called my cell phone to make sure I'd catch her stream later that day
???
I don't even participate in chat 🤣
Picking characters in a Buffy board game, Mark said "should I be Broody Boy, Rapey Boy, Sucks Ass Boy, or Smokin' Daddy Boy?"
I didn't even have to see the character cards to know who he meant for each one 🤣
I didn't even have to see the character cards to know who he meant for each one 🤣
November 3, 2025 at 5:18 AM
Picking characters in a Buffy board game, Mark said "should I be Broody Boy, Rapey Boy, Sucks Ass Boy, or Smokin' Daddy Boy?"
I didn't even have to see the character cards to know who he meant for each one 🤣
I didn't even have to see the character cards to know who he meant for each one 🤣
Mark: "Just like Cher, it's all coming back to me now."
Me: "Um. That's a Celine Dion song."
🤣
Me: "Um. That's a Celine Dion song."
🤣
November 3, 2025 at 5:14 AM
Mark: "Just like Cher, it's all coming back to me now."
Me: "Um. That's a Celine Dion song."
🤣
Me: "Um. That's a Celine Dion song."
🤣
I opened X to tag the podcast I love, scrolled for 30 seconds and got a suggested tweet from the TERF queen and an ad for Shein pretending to be environmentally conscious. Fuck that place. I wish Grimm Reading would get on Bluesky :(
November 2, 2025 at 6:23 AM
I opened X to tag the podcast I love, scrolled for 30 seconds and got a suggested tweet from the TERF queen and an ad for Shein pretending to be environmentally conscious. Fuck that place. I wish Grimm Reading would get on Bluesky :(