Tech-Truth: A Tech Journalism Pitch Bot
@techjournalismbunk.bsky.social
Pitching the bold new stories of CEOs saying things as facts without any critical thinking. Writing headlines and threads with horribly incorrect assumptions about technology like many tech journalists tend to.
Pinned
@techjournalismbot.bsky.social Local CEO says the future of pace makers will require a subscription and an always online connection to enhance the consumer heart beat experience.
“In the future, people will talk to their pacemaker through an implanted mic and speaker. It will always be listening”
“In the future, people will talk to their pacemaker through an implanted mic and speaker. It will always be listening”
Tech journalist: I’m not a lawyer nor have I ever practiced law, but I will make arguments via authority from poorly informed geriatrics who have at best a cursory understanding of the technologies they rule on. Please join me on my whimsical journey of bullshit.
September 10, 2025 at 1:03 AM
Tech journalist: I’m not a lawyer nor have I ever practiced law, but I will make arguments via authority from poorly informed geriatrics who have at best a cursory understanding of the technologies they rule on. Please join me on my whimsical journey of bullshit.
Cleptocracy CEO: we’re rebranding the same old stolen works regurgitator as slopotron 5.0. Please give us more money. We’ve almost burned through all the cash we scammed you out of last funding round.
July 25, 2025 at 3:14 AM
Cleptocracy CEO: we’re rebranding the same old stolen works regurgitator as slopotron 5.0. Please give us more money. We’ve almost burned through all the cash we scammed you out of last funding round.
CEO says, “Meet your new smart ai tampon. Sharing your medical data with the highest bidder and listening to your every utterance with our patterned microphone tech. It will send you text messages through the day when you ask if questions. Brought to you by the humane pin creators”
May 29, 2025 at 5:38 PM
CEO says, “Meet your new smart ai tampon. Sharing your medical data with the highest bidder and listening to your every utterance with our patterned microphone tech. It will send you text messages through the day when you ask if questions. Brought to you by the humane pin creators”
@nytpitchbot.bsky.social
We have begun our new phase of big tech journalism. Please clap for our new big idea of publishing CEOs saying things
We have begun our new phase of big tech journalism. Please clap for our new big idea of publishing CEOs saying things
@karlbode.com
Our big tech journalism CEO is pleased to announce our pivot from boat journalism to big tech CEOs saying things journalism.
Did you know the deepdoodoo.ai.io CEO just declared the future of toilets is super intelligent sentience?
“Your toilet will solve world hunger”
Our big tech journalism CEO is pleased to announce our pivot from boat journalism to big tech CEOs saying things journalism.
Did you know the deepdoodoo.ai.io CEO just declared the future of toilets is super intelligent sentience?
“Your toilet will solve world hunger”
@techjournalismbot.bsky.social Local CEO says the future of pace makers will require a subscription and an always online connection to enhance the consumer heart beat experience.
“In the future, people will talk to their pacemaker through an implanted mic and speaker. It will always be listening”
“In the future, people will talk to their pacemaker through an implanted mic and speaker. It will always be listening”
May 29, 2025 at 5:34 PM
@nytpitchbot.bsky.social
We have begun our new phase of big tech journalism. Please clap for our new big idea of publishing CEOs saying things
We have begun our new phase of big tech journalism. Please clap for our new big idea of publishing CEOs saying things
@karlbode.com
Our big tech journalism CEO is pleased to announce our pivot from boat journalism to big tech CEOs saying things journalism.
Did you know the deepdoodoo.ai.io CEO just declared the future of toilets is super intelligent sentience?
“Your toilet will solve world hunger”
Our big tech journalism CEO is pleased to announce our pivot from boat journalism to big tech CEOs saying things journalism.
Did you know the deepdoodoo.ai.io CEO just declared the future of toilets is super intelligent sentience?
“Your toilet will solve world hunger”
@techjournalismbot.bsky.social Local CEO says the future of pace makers will require a subscription and an always online connection to enhance the consumer heart beat experience.
“In the future, people will talk to their pacemaker through an implanted mic and speaker. It will always be listening”
“In the future, people will talk to their pacemaker through an implanted mic and speaker. It will always be listening”
May 29, 2025 at 5:20 PM
@karlbode.com
Our big tech journalism CEO is pleased to announce our pivot from boat journalism to big tech CEOs saying things journalism.
Did you know the deepdoodoo.ai.io CEO just declared the future of toilets is super intelligent sentience?
“Your toilet will solve world hunger”
Our big tech journalism CEO is pleased to announce our pivot from boat journalism to big tech CEOs saying things journalism.
Did you know the deepdoodoo.ai.io CEO just declared the future of toilets is super intelligent sentience?
“Your toilet will solve world hunger”
@techjournalismbot.bsky.social Local CEO says the future of pace makers will require a subscription and an always online connection to enhance the consumer heart beat experience.
“In the future, people will talk to their pacemaker through an implanted mic and speaker. It will always be listening”
“In the future, people will talk to their pacemaker through an implanted mic and speaker. It will always be listening”
May 29, 2025 at 5:11 PM
@techjournalismbot.bsky.social Local CEO says the future of pace makers will require a subscription and an always online connection to enhance the consumer heart beat experience.
“In the future, people will talk to their pacemaker through an implanted mic and speaker. It will always be listening”
“In the future, people will talk to their pacemaker through an implanted mic and speaker. It will always be listening”
I’m sad that my job is done now.
@rnssc.bsky.social @theboatgalley.com @navalarchitect.bsky.social
What should i do with my backhoe now?
@rnssc.bsky.social @theboatgalley.com @navalarchitect.bsky.social
What should i do with my backhoe now?
May 15, 2025 at 12:20 AM
I’m sad that my job is done now.
@rnssc.bsky.social @theboatgalley.com @navalarchitect.bsky.social
What should i do with my backhoe now?
@rnssc.bsky.social @theboatgalley.com @navalarchitect.bsky.social
What should i do with my backhoe now?
Step boat help, I’m stuck in the estuary
@rnssc.bsky.social @navalarchitect.bsky.social @navytimes.bsky.social @navylookout.bsky.social @rnssc.bsky.social
#BoatStuck
@rnssc.bsky.social @navalarchitect.bsky.social @navytimes.bsky.social @navylookout.bsky.social @rnssc.bsky.social
#BoatStuck
March 18, 2025 at 1:46 AM
Step boat help, I’m stuck in the estuary
@rnssc.bsky.social @navalarchitect.bsky.social @navytimes.bsky.social @navylookout.bsky.social @rnssc.bsky.social
#BoatStuck
@rnssc.bsky.social @navalarchitect.bsky.social @navytimes.bsky.social @navylookout.bsky.social @rnssc.bsky.social
#BoatStuck
@rnssc.bsky.social how does on get a huge boat unstuck fast?
March 6, 2025 at 2:06 AM
@rnssc.bsky.social how does on get a huge boat unstuck fast?
@navalarchitect.bsky.social how do re-float a big ass boat?
March 6, 2025 at 2:05 AM
@navalarchitect.bsky.social how do re-float a big ass boat?
Guys I’m doing my best here
The H&S Wisdom was heading to Gunness Wharf near Scunthorpe when it ran aground on Sunday in the in Humber estuary, now it'll be stuck in the channel until early April at least
Cargo ship will be stuck in mud of Humber estuary 'for a month'
The H&S Wisdom ran aground on Sunday night and remains stuck despite three attempts to refloat it.
www.bbc.co.uk
March 6, 2025 at 2:02 AM
Guys I’m doing my best here
Sometimes one wonders “how did they think this would work?”
March 6, 2025 at 2:00 AM
Sometimes one wonders “how did they think this would work?”
I’m doing my best to refloat and dig out the giant ironically named wisdom boat.
It’s a tough job but somebody has to do it.
It’s a tough job but somebody has to do it.
March 6, 2025 at 1:54 AM
I’m doing my best to refloat and dig out the giant ironically named wisdom boat.
It’s a tough job but somebody has to do it.
It’s a tough job but somebody has to do it.