🏈 GB 40 - 40 DAL
FINAL

✅ That's Scorigami!! It's the 1093rd unique final score in NFL history.

🏈 BAL 40 - 41 BUF
FINAL

✅ That's Scorigami!! It's the 1092nd unique final score in NFL history.

last time I got new glasses ➡️ just got new glasses

breakfast sandwiches taste best after a night of drinking

I would be the coolest person ever if I could play the guitar

I despise how the internet reduced this to just a meme, a silly joke. YALL NOT HEARING HER! WE EXIST IN CONTEXT!

no more wars. if world leaders have beef they can 1v1 about it

can I come over and stare at u like this

you’re fired. wait you’re rehired. email us a list of things you’ve done today wait forget it you’re fired again. come back your job was important. you’re fired. or hired. come in to the office. wait the office has no computers go home. we are the department of government efficiency.

idk why it’s so embarrassing to me to experience known, common side effects of a medication. like I thought I was built different… I thought I was above this…

the ants in my backyard will never know the beach

I never would have predicted the sheer amount of joy it could bring me to sit on a park bench on an abnormally warm february day

sit with me on the Jouch™️

wawa: welcome, rewards member. 😌❤️
sheetz: whatsup you fucking FREAK!!! 🤪🤘🏻

tonight I referred to someone as being “in my grade” as if i’m not 26 years old

friend: hey there’s a party downtown for everyone except people who enjoy female talk shows
me: shit dude i can’t come
friend: what why
me:

we got to go on a field trip in 8th grade to see this movie in theaters. I don’t remember a lick of it. think I fell asleep