That CheapShow Stuff
@thatcheapshowstuff.bsky.social
Enjoy random quotes from the economy comedy podcast "CheapShow"
Check them out at https://www.thecheapshow.co.uk/ or @cheapshow.bsky.social
Check them out at https://www.thecheapshow.co.uk/ or @cheapshow.bsky.social
Eli: "Paul's written something here, er. 'I am a cunt'"
461 - 50 Words
461 - 50 Words
December 26, 2025 at 8:00 AM
Eli: "Paul's written something here, er. 'I am a cunt'"
461 - 50 Words
461 - 50 Words
Sooz Kempner: "My willy did a burp!"
Paul: "Right, and that's the moment we end the cold open"
259 - Mystery on the Clock
Paul: "Right, and that's the moment we end the cold open"
259 - Mystery on the Clock
December 22, 2025 at 8:00 AM
Sooz Kempner: "My willy did a burp!"
Paul: "Right, and that's the moment we end the cold open"
259 - Mystery on the Clock
Paul: "Right, and that's the moment we end the cold open"
259 - Mystery on the Clock
Paul: "Why don't you play the hippie hard house?! Boo-ba-doop-doop, boo-ba-doop-doop, boo-ba-doop-doop"
Eli: "Yezh, yezh, yezh, yezh, yezh, yezh, yezh!"
136 - Good Game
Eli: "Yezh, yezh, yezh, yezh, yezh, yezh, yezh!"
136 - Good Game
December 19, 2025 at 8:00 AM
Paul: "Why don't you play the hippie hard house?! Boo-ba-doop-doop, boo-ba-doop-doop, boo-ba-doop-doop"
Eli: "Yezh, yezh, yezh, yezh, yezh, yezh, yezh!"
136 - Good Game
Eli: "Yezh, yezh, yezh, yezh, yezh, yezh, yezh!"
136 - Good Game
Paul: "Anythinnnn', dum dum dum, buh buh buh, bah bah bah, dah dah dah, goooeees. Dun-da dum-dee dum-dee dum-dee, Paul is a prick. Yooooo."
Eli: "I'm starting again"
132 - Crab Bucket
Eli: "I'm starting again"
132 - Crab Bucket
December 15, 2025 at 8:00 AM
Paul: "Anythinnnn', dum dum dum, buh buh buh, bah bah bah, dah dah dah, goooeees. Dun-da dum-dee dum-dee dum-dee, Paul is a prick. Yooooo."
Eli: "I'm starting again"
132 - Crab Bucket
Eli: "I'm starting again"
132 - Crab Bucket
Eli: "We're a professional podcast team"
Paul: "Stroke ghosthunters"
Eli: "Stroke... my... nob"
12 - The CheapShow CreepShow
Paul: "Stroke ghosthunters"
Eli: "Stroke... my... nob"
12 - The CheapShow CreepShow
December 12, 2025 at 8:00 AM
Eli: "We're a professional podcast team"
Paul: "Stroke ghosthunters"
Eli: "Stroke... my... nob"
12 - The CheapShow CreepShow
Paul: "Stroke ghosthunters"
Eli: "Stroke... my... nob"
12 - The CheapShow CreepShow
Mr Biffo: "I'm Ash Frith. I'm Ashhh Freeeth!"
202 - I Know What You Did Last Episode
202 - I Know What You Did Last Episode
December 8, 2025 at 8:00 AM
Mr Biffo: "I'm Ash Frith. I'm Ashhh Freeeth!"
202 - I Know What You Did Last Episode
202 - I Know What You Did Last Episode
Paul: "The singeth and the wingeth. How d'you like that ya fucking prick?!"
Eli: "Touché"
277 - Sock Race
Eli: "Touché"
277 - Sock Race
December 5, 2025 at 8:00 AM
Paul: "The singeth and the wingeth. How d'you like that ya fucking prick?!"
Eli: "Touché"
277 - Sock Race
Eli: "Touché"
277 - Sock Race
Paul: "It's like a Caribbean holiday in your mouth"
Eli: "Yeah, it's a party in my mouth and there's limbo dancers who haven't wiped their bum properly"
Paul: "*exasperated sigh*"
137 - Soda Jerk Off
Eli: "Yeah, it's a party in my mouth and there's limbo dancers who haven't wiped their bum properly"
Paul: "*exasperated sigh*"
137 - Soda Jerk Off
December 1, 2025 at 8:00 AM
Paul: "It's like a Caribbean holiday in your mouth"
Eli: "Yeah, it's a party in my mouth and there's limbo dancers who haven't wiped their bum properly"
Paul: "*exasperated sigh*"
137 - Soda Jerk Off
Eli: "Yeah, it's a party in my mouth and there's limbo dancers who haven't wiped their bum properly"
Paul: "*exasperated sigh*"
137 - Soda Jerk Off
Paul: "Welcome back to the CheapShow game show special. I'm your host, Paul Gannon, and I'm joined with"
Eli: "Eli Silverman! Hagga-dagga doo dah!"
20 - The Play Your Blankety Cards Right Game Show
Eli: "Eli Silverman! Hagga-dagga doo dah!"
20 - The Play Your Blankety Cards Right Game Show
November 28, 2025 at 8:00 AM
Paul: "Welcome back to the CheapShow game show special. I'm your host, Paul Gannon, and I'm joined with"
Eli: "Eli Silverman! Hagga-dagga doo dah!"
20 - The Play Your Blankety Cards Right Game Show
Eli: "Eli Silverman! Hagga-dagga doo dah!"
20 - The Play Your Blankety Cards Right Game Show
Tom Mayhew: "We talk about songs that are quite crap songs released by snooker players"
Eli: "It's funny that there's such a rich vein of snooker based..."
Paul: "I've got a rich vein, in my cock!"
Eli: "Paul! Paul no! Not acceptable!"
401 - How Many Chevys?
Eli: "It's funny that there's such a rich vein of snooker based..."
Paul: "I've got a rich vein, in my cock!"
Eli: "Paul! Paul no! Not acceptable!"
401 - How Many Chevys?
November 24, 2025 at 8:00 AM
Tom Mayhew: "We talk about songs that are quite crap songs released by snooker players"
Eli: "It's funny that there's such a rich vein of snooker based..."
Paul: "I've got a rich vein, in my cock!"
Eli: "Paul! Paul no! Not acceptable!"
401 - How Many Chevys?
Eli: "It's funny that there's such a rich vein of snooker based..."
Paul: "I've got a rich vein, in my cock!"
Eli: "Paul! Paul no! Not acceptable!"
401 - How Many Chevys?
Eli: "Now, I've fooled you"
Paul: "Oh ooh"
Eli: "Cause I found this in Brixton tube station"
Paul: "We ate that!"
Eli: "So hold onto it in case you get some kind of terrible stomach cramp"
32 - Silent Night Soil
Paul: "Oh ooh"
Eli: "Cause I found this in Brixton tube station"
Paul: "We ate that!"
Eli: "So hold onto it in case you get some kind of terrible stomach cramp"
32 - Silent Night Soil
November 21, 2025 at 8:00 AM
Eli: "Now, I've fooled you"
Paul: "Oh ooh"
Eli: "Cause I found this in Brixton tube station"
Paul: "We ate that!"
Eli: "So hold onto it in case you get some kind of terrible stomach cramp"
32 - Silent Night Soil
Paul: "Oh ooh"
Eli: "Cause I found this in Brixton tube station"
Paul: "We ate that!"
Eli: "So hold onto it in case you get some kind of terrible stomach cramp"
32 - Silent Night Soil
Eli: "Hello, thank you for listening to Eli's selected CheapShow moments. Spodney broddy"
Paul: "Shut up"
Eli: "Brodgley mcgovrow"
Paul: "Stop talking shit!"
230 - Edit Point
Paul: "Shut up"
Eli: "Brodgley mcgovrow"
Paul: "Stop talking shit!"
230 - Edit Point
November 17, 2025 at 8:00 AM
Eli: "Hello, thank you for listening to Eli's selected CheapShow moments. Spodney broddy"
Paul: "Shut up"
Eli: "Brodgley mcgovrow"
Paul: "Stop talking shit!"
230 - Edit Point
Paul: "Shut up"
Eli: "Brodgley mcgovrow"
Paul: "Stop talking shit!"
230 - Edit Point
Paul: "I'm sexy boy Paul Gannon and I'm here for yooouuu. Ho, ho, hooo, I am sexy, so sexy you don't know. And I'm sexy from the bottom to my toes. Just. The. Bottom. Half! 🎵"
276 - Oh Norman
276 - Oh Norman
November 14, 2025 at 8:00 AM
Paul: "I'm sexy boy Paul Gannon and I'm here for yooouuu. Ho, ho, hooo, I am sexy, so sexy you don't know. And I'm sexy from the bottom to my toes. Just. The. Bottom. Half! 🎵"
276 - Oh Norman
276 - Oh Norman
Eli: "Oh Vera, Veraaa. Stop, I don't want to talk to him. Who's on the phone, is it my boss? (See I'm building character here)"
Paul: "Yes it's your boss. He wants to know why you didn't come in again today for work"
Eli: "It's my huge dick!"
136 - Good Game
Paul: "Yes it's your boss. He wants to know why you didn't come in again today for work"
Eli: "It's my huge dick!"
136 - Good Game
November 10, 2025 at 8:00 AM
Eli: "Oh Vera, Veraaa. Stop, I don't want to talk to him. Who's on the phone, is it my boss? (See I'm building character here)"
Paul: "Yes it's your boss. He wants to know why you didn't come in again today for work"
Eli: "It's my huge dick!"
136 - Good Game
Paul: "Yes it's your boss. He wants to know why you didn't come in again today for work"
Eli: "It's my huge dick!"
136 - Good Game
Paul: "At least she didn't get her penis out... Boobs! I meant to say boobs"
Eli: "Paul's unconscious mind la la la, Paul's unconscious dicky-booby mind 🎵"
130 - Cheapflix
Eli: "Paul's unconscious mind la la la, Paul's unconscious dicky-booby mind 🎵"
130 - Cheapflix
November 7, 2025 at 8:00 AM
Paul: "At least she didn't get her penis out... Boobs! I meant to say boobs"
Eli: "Paul's unconscious mind la la la, Paul's unconscious dicky-booby mind 🎵"
130 - Cheapflix
Eli: "Paul's unconscious mind la la la, Paul's unconscious dicky-booby mind 🎵"
130 - Cheapflix
Eli: "I got thwoppage. I got thwoppage. I've got a nice greased up thwoppage for you madAAAM! 🎵"
Paul: "I love the way you turned that into an end of the pier type thing then"
131 - Ye Olde Froth Shoppe
Paul: "I love the way you turned that into an end of the pier type thing then"
131 - Ye Olde Froth Shoppe
November 3, 2025 at 8:00 AM
Eli: "I got thwoppage. I got thwoppage. I've got a nice greased up thwoppage for you madAAAM! 🎵"
Paul: "I love the way you turned that into an end of the pier type thing then"
131 - Ye Olde Froth Shoppe
Paul: "I love the way you turned that into an end of the pier type thing then"
131 - Ye Olde Froth Shoppe
Paul: "There's one little rule in my life mate and it's simply this; Never peg a teddy bear. Never ted a peggy bear!"
381 - Three Swiss Francs
381 - Three Swiss Francs
October 31, 2025 at 8:00 AM
Paul: "There's one little rule in my life mate and it's simply this; Never peg a teddy bear. Never ted a peggy bear!"
381 - Three Swiss Francs
381 - Three Swiss Francs
Eli: "I'll come round while you sleep, and put the pubes in your eyes 🎵"
83 - Mouth Sounds
83 - Mouth Sounds
October 27, 2025 at 8:00 AM
Eli: "I'll come round while you sleep, and put the pubes in your eyes 🎵"
83 - Mouth Sounds
83 - Mouth Sounds
Paul: "So basically it's like there's like a kinda melted cosmopolitan inside my tummybum"
314 - The Mini Milk Manoeuvre
314 - The Mini Milk Manoeuvre
October 24, 2025 at 8:00 AM
Paul: "So basically it's like there's like a kinda melted cosmopolitan inside my tummybum"
314 - The Mini Milk Manoeuvre
314 - The Mini Milk Manoeuvre
Paul: "He had those fucking gold wri.. wres .. wriswres what are they called? Neckl.. Necklaces for your wrist. What are they called?! Bracelets!"
458 - Tat Hunt Teddington
458 - Tat Hunt Teddington
October 20, 2025 at 8:00 AM
Paul: "He had those fucking gold wri.. wres .. wriswres what are they called? Neckl.. Necklaces for your wrist. What are they called?! Bracelets!"
458 - Tat Hunt Teddington
458 - Tat Hunt Teddington
October 17, 2025 at 8:00 AM
Eli: "What about this; I've spoffy in your biscoffy"
327 - Silversquirt
327 - Silversquirt
October 13, 2025 at 8:00 AM
Eli: "What about this; I've spoffy in your biscoffy"
327 - Silversquirt
327 - Silversquirt
Eli: "It's the House of Pickles and it has a stylish, zesty fragrance"
Paul: "That is not a zesty fragrance mate. Farts curry and fucking, I don't know, fag ends is not a zesty fragrance!"
44 - Cheeky Crackheads & Filthy Mansion
Paul: "That is not a zesty fragrance mate. Farts curry and fucking, I don't know, fag ends is not a zesty fragrance!"
44 - Cheeky Crackheads & Filthy Mansion
October 10, 2025 at 8:00 AM
Eli: "It's the House of Pickles and it has a stylish, zesty fragrance"
Paul: "That is not a zesty fragrance mate. Farts curry and fucking, I don't know, fag ends is not a zesty fragrance!"
44 - Cheeky Crackheads & Filthy Mansion
Paul: "That is not a zesty fragrance mate. Farts curry and fucking, I don't know, fag ends is not a zesty fragrance!"
44 - Cheeky Crackheads & Filthy Mansion
Paul: "Don't get run over Eli, that would affect the podcast adversely"
104 - Mall Twats
104 - Mall Twats
October 6, 2025 at 8:00 AM
Paul: "Don't get run over Eli, that would affect the podcast adversely"
104 - Mall Twats
104 - Mall Twats
Eli: "I reckon there'll be a crisp brand out in the next few years called Potato Wanker"
251 - Under New Management
251 - Under New Management
October 3, 2025 at 8:00 AM
Eli: "I reckon there'll be a crisp brand out in the next few years called Potato Wanker"
251 - Under New Management
251 - Under New Management