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timberbams.bsky.social
ʙᴀᴍs🚫🧊(ᴋᴜ ᴠᴇʀsɪᴏɴ🏀🫧)™
@timberbams.bsky.social
2.8K followers 3.5K following 6.4K posts
♡ʙᴀᴄᴏɴ ᴡʀᴀᴘᴘᴇᴅ ɢʀɪʟʟᴇᴅ ᴄʜᴇᴇsᴇ ᴛʜᴇ ᴜɴᴏ ᴄʜᴀᴍᴘ ᴀᴍʙᴇʀ ᴅᴀᴡɴ ᴘᴏᴜᴛʏ ᴘʀɪɴᴄᴇss ᴘᴀɴᴄᴀᴋᴇs ғɪʀsᴛ ᴏғ ʜᴇʀ ɴᴀᴍᴇ🥓🧀👑🏈❤️‍🔥🥁♡ᴅᴏᴏᴏ ᴅᴏᴏᴏᴏ ᴅᴏᴏᴏᴏᴏɪɴɢ @whatshisfaceme.bsky.social💖 sɪɴᴄᴇ '20♡♾️sᴍɪᴅɢᴇs♡

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timberbams.bsky.social
Heart Eyes (2025) streaming on Netflix
This is the poster for Heart Eyes, and it knows exactly what it’s doing. The background is a flat, aggressive red — not romantic rose-red, but alarm-bell red. Spray-painted behind the figure is a rough, hand-drawn heart outline, like someone scrawled it on a wall in a jealous rage. Front and center stands a shadowed figure dressed in black. Long coat. Gloves. The silhouette is almost casual — relaxed posture, slightly turned. But the face is where it gets clever: the mask has glowing red heart-shaped eyes. Not cute hearts. Not candy hearts. Neon, hollow, predatory hearts. It’s a simple visual joke turned sinister: “heart eyes” usually means infatuation. Here it means fixation. Obsession. Hunt mode. The tagline in bold red letters: “This Valentine’s Day, no couple is safe.” That’s important. Unlike the earlier posters you showed — where rejection or mining tragedy felt specific — this one broadens the threat. It’s targeting couples. Love itself is the trigger. The title font is jagged and raw, almost spray-painted. It feels contemporary, social-media-aware, meme-literate. This isn’t gothic or industrial horror. It’s modern, self-aware slasher energy. At the bottom: “Get heartbroken February.” That line is playful in a dark way. It leans into the pun. The marketing tone is less tragic, more mischievous. It’s saying: we know this is a holiday slasher. Come have fun.
February 13, 2026 at 8:11 PM
timberbams.bsky.social
My Bloody Valentine (2009) streaming on various platforms
This is the 2009 My Bloody Valentine poster, and it ditches the busy mine chaos for something much more iconic: a close-up of the miner. Front and center is the helmet and gas mask — thick lenses, circular respirator, heavy shadows swallowing the eyes. No visible humanity. Just machinery. The mask makes him feel less like a man and more like an environmental hazard. He’s holding a red heart in both gloved hands. It looks like a Valentine’s candy heart at first glance… but it’s dark, splattered, cracked. The red is thick and dirty. There’s grime and blood flecked across everything. Love has been handled roughly. The entire color palette is suffocating reds and blacks. No neon irony this time. No playful pink candy aesthetics. This one is stripped down and primal. Red equals blood. Red equals warning. Red equals heart. Above, the title “My Bloody Valentine” uses metallic gold lettering, sharp and glossy — almost romantic in typeface — which contrasts beautifully with the filth of the image. That “V” feels like a blade. Underneath, the tagline: “Cross your heart… and hope to die.” That’s a twisted playground rhyme. Childhood promise language turned lethal. Horror loves corrupting nursery phrases — it hits something primal in the brain. The composition is symmetrical and intimate. The miner is staring straight at you through the mask. You’re the Valentine. There’s no background distraction. Just you and the threat. What’s interesting about the 2009 remake marketing compared to the original 1981 vibe is how it leans into iconography over narrative. The killer becomes a brand. The mask becomes the logo. It’s very 2000s horror — think sleek, polished, franchise-ready menace. If the first one felt like a grimy mining accident wrapped in Valentine irony, this one feels like a horror collectible figure on a blood-red shelf. Industrial romance. OSHA violation meets Hallmark.
February 13, 2026 at 8:11 PM
timberbams.bsky.social
Valentine (2001) streaming on Tubi
This is a poster for Valentine (2001). The entire image is dominated by a deep red rose, its petals forming a dark, velvety backdrop. Emerging from the center is a pale face—expression blank, almost mannequin-like. But it’s not a real face. It’s a mask made from torn notebook paper. Across the paper, handwritten over and over: “She loves me. She loves me not.” That childhood game—pluck petals, test fate, measure love like it’s a math problem—has been turned obsessive. The repetition gives it a compulsive, spiraling vibe. One eye hole is ripped open jaggedly, revealing a dark eye staring out. The other eye is shadowed, hollow. The mask feels fragile and artificial, like love itself in this story. At the top are the cast names—David Boreanaz, Denise Richards, Marley Shelton, Katherine Heigl—very early 2000s energy. Below the face is the tagline: “Remember that kid everyone ignored on Valentine’s Day? — He remembers you.” That line is doing heavy psychological lifting. This isn’t random violence; it’s wounded ego, festering resentment, social humiliation curdled into revenge. The final line, simple and blunt: “Love hurts.” And visually? The rose stem runs along the bottom like a quiet blade. The red tones are suffocating. The composition feels intimate and invasive, like the killer is hiding inside a symbol of romance itself.
February 13, 2026 at 8:11 PM
timberbams.bsky.social
Lovers Lane (2000)
This is the poster for Lovers Lane. The background is blurred and shadowy, with a large, ghostly face looming out of darkness — almost skull-like, soft focus, distorted. It feels like something watching from very close range. Not a monster in full reveal. A presence. In the foreground hangs a fishing hook. Sharp. Curved. Reflective. It’s suspended like bait. That’s the metaphor doing the heavy lifting. Below, car headlights beam through fog or darkness — classic “parked on a lonely road” horror setup. And at the bottom, a body lies in silhouette on the ground, barely visible but unmistakable. The title uses red lettering, with the “V” in “Lovers” shaped like a heart. It’s subtle but deliberate. Romance embedded into the word itself. The heart shape becomes part of the trap. This poster leans into urban legend energy — the hook-handed killer trope, couples parked on secluded roads, teenage vulnerability. It’s not about revenge mythology like My Bloody Valentine. It’s not about social humiliation like Valentine. It’s about the ritual of lovers seeking privacy… and something hunting them. The fishing hook imagery is clever. Hooks don’t stab randomly. They lure. They catch. They hold.
February 13, 2026 at 8:11 PM
timberbams.bsky.social
My Bloody Valentine (1981) streaming on PlutoTV
This is a stylized, neon-drenched horror illustration inspired by My Bloody Valentine. The scene shows a miner in full gear—helmet, heavy coat, gas mask with hose—standing on railroad tracks inside a dark mine. He’s holding a blood-stained pickaxe that’s embedded in a body lying on the rails. The lighting is dramatic and surreal: hot reds and pinks clash with cold blues and teals, giving it that retro, almost cyberpunk glow. Hearts float in the air like ironic confetti. There are Valentine candy shapes and pink love graphics layered into the background—some sweet, some warped. The contrast is intentional: affection colliding with brutality. Love notes in bubblegum pink next to fresh blood on steel. The mine setting adds claustrophobia—overhead lights flare through dust and shadow. The perspective pulls your eye down the tracks toward the miner, who feels both isolated and menacing. It’s not photorealistic; it’s painterly, graphic, almost poster-art style, with exaggerated color grading and sharp contrast. At the bottom, the title “MY BLOODY VALENTINE” is displayed in bold white serif text, anchoring it like a theatrical movie poster. It’s basically: Cupid if he clocked in with OSHA violations and unresolved rage. There’s something fascinating about how horror loves to corrupt symbols of sweetness—Valentine hearts, candy, pink ribbons—turning them into visual irony. That tension between tenderness and violence is doing all the storytelling here.
February 13, 2026 at 8:11 PM
timberbams.bsky.social
Big points by my chair: Spider.
Middle: OMG IT’S A SPIDER.
Me, already panicking: Big, get the hairspray!
Instead, Big drags me toward it. I shriek and back away
Little walks in, picks it up barehanded like a legend: Spider-Man!

Turns out it was this:
A rubber Spider-Man logo about half an inch long from Stan Lee only knows what from my boys toys that I'm 95% sure Big purposely put there to try to scare me but who knows 🤣
February 12, 2026 at 9:16 PM
timberbams.bsky.social
Maybe Taylor Swift did attend...

YOU DON'T KNOW!!!
Tree people for Bad Bunny's Halftime Super Bowl Show
February 10, 2026 at 7:42 PM
timberbams.bsky.social
Draw myself like one of his French Toast Girls
Little grilled cheese doodle from the video on YouTube How to Draw a Funny Grilled Cheese Sandwich by Art for kids Hub of a French toast grilled cheese sandwich and cinnamon sprinkled over it for "freckles" caption is Bams being a doofusina referencing the line from Titanic "Draw me like one of your French girls"
February 3, 2026 at 5:04 PM
timberbams.bsky.social
Millennials can all crow thanks to this movie
This image is the classic poster for the 1991 movie Hook pure millennial Neverland nostalgia in one frame. It shows: Captain Hook front and center on the left, with his dramatic curled mustache, pirate coat, and iconic silver hook hand. Peter Pan (played by Robin Williams) on the right, smiling warmly in contrast to Hook’s intense glare. Tinker Bell glowing in the upper left corner, tiny and magical with her wings. A parchment-style, storybook background filled with little scenes and characters from Neverland around the edges. The bold red title “Hook” across the bottom, in a fairy-tale gothic font. The whole vibe is adventurous, whimsical, and a little mischievous like a bedtime story exploded into pirate chaos.
January 31, 2026 at 6:09 PM
timberbams.bsky.social
I'm still in disbelief. She was and always will be considered one of the greatest actors.
Watercolor collage of Catherine O'Hara's roles on Home Alone, The Nightmare Before Christmas, Beetlejuice, Schitts Creek, and The Last of Us and the words Rest in Peace Catherine O'Hara 1954 - 2026
January 30, 2026 at 7:19 PM
timberbams.bsky.social
Anytime I see anything about current world events.
A blurred image of a silhouette running that says "I wish I could wake up but this is not a nightmare"
January 29, 2026 at 7:56 AM
timberbams.bsky.social
That’s why they call it the American Dream, because you have to be asleep to believe it. - George Carlin
"That’s why they call it the American Dream, because you have to be asleep to believe it.” — George Carlin
January 26, 2026 at 4:17 PM
timberbams.bsky.social
It all makes sense now.
Joseph Quinn as Eddie Munson on Stranger Things Season 4 and Heath Ledger as Patrick Verona on 10 Things I Hate About You
January 14, 2026 at 10:40 PM
timberbams.bsky.social
Mood Today:
This image feels like a mirror caught between two world one warm and festive, the other cold and corrupted stitched together by something that’s equal parts holiday glow and living nightmare. At the top, the woman is right side up in soft, golden lighting, like a cozy Christmas evening indoors. The background is blurred with warm bokeh, suggesting twinkle lights and a comfortable room. Her expression is calm, poised, and slightly mysterious she isn’t smiling wide, but she isn’t afraid either. Her hair is long and wavy, framing her face in a classic portrait pose. Over her left eye is an ornate holiday “mask”: evergreen sprigs, a shiny red ornament, and a small gold star arranged like a decorative wreath. Tiny sparkles and snowflake-like flecks shimmer around it, making the covered eye feel whimsical and magical rather than hidden. Her visible eye is dark and steady, and her red lipstick anchors the whole top half in classic holiday glam. Cutting through the center is the most striking element: a thick band of tangled red vines wrapped with bright Christmas lights in multiple colors. The lights glow cheerfully, but the vines twist and coil like nerves or veins, giving the divider a living, almost predatory feel. It’s a boundary line, but also a bridge, as if the two halves are being forcibly connected. Below, the composition flips into an upside-down “reflection.” The same woman appears, but changed her skin is paler, marked with faint cracked patterns and eerie branching lines. On one side, her face is overtaken by an alien organic growth: black and red tendrils spread outward from a glowing red eye like a blooming wound made of roots and shadow. The red eye looks like an ember or a core of energy, pulsing with unnatural life. Her remaining human eye stays dark and focused, giving her a haunted resilience rather than panic. The background behind her is a red-black forest filled with fog and floating embers, like a corrupted landscape bleeding into reality.
December 25, 2025 at 8:01 PM
timberbams.bsky.social
Nativity Scene with Camel saying "Hey! Guess what day it is!" And the rest of them yelling "Not now, Camel!"
December 25, 2025 at 12:08 AM
timberbams.bsky.social
Merry Christmas Eve, from my family to yours.
Santa and his reindeer flying over Kansas City, Missouri with a silhouette of a woman and three young children looking. With a snow overlay
December 24, 2025 at 11:27 PM
timberbams.bsky.social
I kinda want to get this and say "You can't catch me I'm Gingerbread Bams"
Picture of an inflatable costume of a gingerbread woman on amazon.
December 22, 2025 at 9:31 PM
timberbams.bsky.social
POV: You said “don’t climb the tree”...so I became the tree. 🌲😼✨
It’s a close-up of a cat hiding in a Christmas tree like a tiny festive cryptid. You can see the kitty’s face framed by green branches and needles, with big round pupils reflecting the colorful tree lights. The fur is mostly white around the nose and mouth with brown tabby markings around the eyes and ears. The overall lighting is warm and colorful: yellows, greens, and purples so it feels very “glowy holiday evening.” Expression: 100% “I was absolutely not just climbing the tree, why do you ask?”
December 10, 2025 at 2:15 AM
timberbams.bsky.social
Him: I hate snow
Me: Yeah, fuck snow!
Him:
Holes in the snow
December 4, 2025 at 7:42 PM
timberbams.bsky.social
Four Christmas movies to know me by:
The Santa Clause (1994) starring Tim Allen Home Alone (1990) Scrooge (1988) It's A Wonderful Life (1946)
December 4, 2025 at 7:27 PM
timberbams.bsky.social
I know you're sick of leftovers but I have catloaf
A grey tiger-striped cat lying on a brown and turquoise rug looking like a cat loaf.
December 1, 2025 at 1:05 AM
timberbams.bsky.social
We don't give a da❌️n for the whole state of ❌️ichigan‼️
Brutus Buckeye (Ohio State Buckeyes mascot) destroying Michigan's M logo.
November 29, 2025 at 5:05 PM
timberbams.bsky.social
I love football
November 27, 2025 at 10:35 PM
timberbams.bsky.social
3 more nights until I can play my 16-bit gaming console
Picture of the Americantendo. Text: Coming Soon to Starcourt Mall (logo) / Only at The Game Player.
November 23, 2025 at 3:57 AM
timberbams.bsky.social
Look at him grinning like a cosmic glitch thrilled it loaded correctly. Mamdani stands beside him radiating ‘I debate policy; this dude battles gravity.’ The contrast is gravitational...one’s a statesman, the other’s a black-hole-level disappointment in a tie.
This photo looks like the man in the red tie (Trump) just completed the political equivalent of a coloring book and genuinely thinks he deserves a Nobel Prize for not eating the crayons. He’s staring up with that blissfully vacant grin... the kind of smile you only see on toddlers who just discovered their own toes or on people who believe WiFi comes from satellites powered by patriotism. Meanwhile, Blue Tie Guy (Zohran Mamdani) beside him is standing there with the thousand-yard stare of a man who knows he’s witnessing history, but not the good kind more like ‘the fall of Rome but somehow dumber.’ Red Tie Guy’s whole vibe is: ‘I pushed the button they told me to push, aren’t you proud?’ Completely unaware that every neuron he has is working overtime just to keep his eyelids blinking in sync. It’s the face of someone who could look directly at a cactus and still ask, ‘Is that the guy from Star Wars?’ Blue Tie Guy’s soul? Gone. Evacuated. You can practically hear his inner monologue screaming: ‘I am a progressive New York Assembly member who beat a long-time incumbent, pushes hard for housing rights, free buses, and tenant protections, aligns with DSA, and is running for NYC mayor. I have sponsored a lot of bills. Big ideas, big ambition, mixed record. And now I’m meeting with a man who thinks the Constitution is just a fancy menu.’ This isn’t a photo op. This is a Renaissance painting titled: “The Emperor Has No Brain Cell.”
November 22, 2025 at 7:52 PM