buster hawthorne
@tummlord.bsky.social
my life is nothing i thought it should be and everything i was worried it would become because for 50 seconds i thought there was monsters on the world
Pinned
buster hawthorne
@tummlord.bsky.social
· Jul 22
Pile - "The Soft Hands of Stephen Miller" (Official Video)
YouTube video by explodinginsound
youtu.be
The Soft Hands of Stephen Miller
Reposted by buster hawthorne
RFK Jr. Demonstrates How To Remove Tapeworm By Scooting Ass Across Carpet
RFK Jr. Demonstrates How To Remove Tapeworm By Scooting Ass Across Carpet
WASHINGTON—In an address touting the practice as a completely drug-free method to relieve the common affliction, Secretary of Health and Human Services Robert F. Kennedy Jr. demonstrated Thursday how ...
theonion.com
February 1, 2026 at 10:00 PM
RFK Jr. Demonstrates How To Remove Tapeworm By Scooting Ass Across Carpet
Reposted by buster hawthorne
Soldier Returning From 2096 Cyber War Reunited With 8-Year-Old Self https://theonion.com/soldier-returning-from-2096-cyber-war-reunited-with-8-year-old-self/
February 2, 2026 at 3:00 PM
Soldier Returning From 2096 Cyber War Reunited With 8-Year-Old Self https://theonion.com/soldier-returning-from-2096-cyber-war-reunited-with-8-year-old-self/
Reposted by buster hawthorne
Fat Kid Avoids Ridicule By Swimming With Shirt On Cutdown
February 2, 2026 at 6:01 PM
Fat Kid Avoids Ridicule By Swimming With Shirt On Cutdown
Reposted by buster hawthorne
Groundhog Harassed By Dipshits In Stupid Hats
February 2, 2026 at 7:00 PM
Groundhog Harassed By Dipshits In Stupid Hats
Reposted by buster hawthorne
Reposted by buster hawthorne
JD Vance Places Candle Outside Hooters Where ICE Agents Were Heckled
January 28, 2026 at 10:00 PM
JD Vance Places Candle Outside Hooters Where ICE Agents Were Heckled
Reposted by buster hawthorne
Elon Musk Files For Custody Of All U.S. Children
January 15, 2026 at 6:01 PM
Elon Musk Files For Custody Of All U.S. Children
Reposted by buster hawthorne
Wow, everyone is addicted to this show
January 12, 2026 at 7:00 PM
Wow, everyone is addicted to this show
Reposted by buster hawthorne
DHS Warns Any Action By Americans Will Be Treated As Domestic Terrorism
January 9, 2026 at 6:01 PM
DHS Warns Any Action By Americans Will Be Treated As Domestic Terrorism
Reposted by buster hawthorne
JD Vance Claims Renée Good Had No Authority To Be Alive In First Place
January 9, 2026 at 5:55 PM
JD Vance Claims Renée Good Had No Authority To Be Alive In First Place
Reposted by buster hawthorne
Insecure, Frustrated Bully With Something To Prove Considering Career In Law Enforcement https://theonion.com/insecure-frustrated-bully-with-something-to-prove-cons-1819575405/
January 8, 2026 at 9:00 PM
Insecure, Frustrated Bully With Something To Prove Considering Career In Law Enforcement https://theonion.com/insecure-frustrated-bully-with-something-to-prove-cons-1819575405/
Reposted by buster hawthorne
ICE Vows To Restore Order Using Whatever Force Unnecessary
January 7, 2026 at 9:30 PM
ICE Vows To Restore Order Using Whatever Force Unnecessary
Reposted by buster hawthorne
Local Church Opens Doors To Any Single Mothers In Need Of Judgment https://theonion.com/local-church-opens-doors-to-any-single-mothers-in-need-of-judgment/
January 5, 2026 at 11:00 PM
Local Church Opens Doors To Any Single Mothers In Need Of Judgment https://theonion.com/local-church-opens-doors-to-any-single-mothers-in-need-of-judgment/
Reposted by buster hawthorne
Trump Claims He Will Marry Maduro’s Wife Until Suitable Replacement Found https://theonion.com/trump-claims-he-will-marry-maduros-wife-until-suitable-replacement-found/
January 5, 2026 at 10:30 PM
Trump Claims He Will Marry Maduro’s Wife Until Suitable Replacement Found https://theonion.com/trump-claims-he-will-marry-maduros-wife-until-suitable-replacement-found/
Reposted by buster hawthorne
Publishers Break Down Door As George R.R. Martin Escapes Through Bathroom Window https://theonion.com/publishers-break-down-door-as-george-r-r-martin-escapes-through-bathroom-window/
January 5, 2026 at 10:00 PM
Publishers Break Down Door As George R.R. Martin Escapes Through Bathroom Window https://theonion.com/publishers-break-down-door-as-george-r-r-martin-escapes-through-bathroom-window/
Reposted by buster hawthorne
Nicolás Maduro Charged With Felony Oil Possession
January 5, 2026 at 7:00 PM
Nicolás Maduro Charged With Felony Oil Possession
Reposted by buster hawthorne
Trump Issues Executive Order Reversing All Vasectomies https://theonion.com/trump-issues-executive-order-reversing-all-vasectomies/
December 29, 2025 at 3:45 PM
Trump Issues Executive Order Reversing All Vasectomies https://theonion.com/trump-issues-executive-order-reversing-all-vasectomies/
Reposted by buster hawthorne
Numerous Teams Express Interest In Aaron Rodgers Playing Elsewhere https://theonion.com/numerous-teams-express-interest-in-aaron-rodgers-playing-elsewhere/
December 22, 2025 at 10:00 PM
Numerous Teams Express Interest In Aaron Rodgers Playing Elsewhere https://theonion.com/numerous-teams-express-interest-in-aaron-rodgers-playing-elsewhere/
Reposted by buster hawthorne
Trump Appears To Doze During Stroke
December 9, 2025 at 8:30 PM
Trump Appears To Doze During Stroke
Reposted by buster hawthorne
Japanese Monk Racks
Brain For Haiku That Will Knock
Them On Their Asses
https://theonion.com/japanese-monk-racksbrain-for-haiku-that-will-knockthem-on-their-asses/
Brain For Haiku That Will Knock
Them On Their Asses
https://theonion.com/japanese-monk-racksbrain-for-haiku-that-will-knockthem-on-their-asses/
December 9, 2025 at 7:00 PM
Japanese Monk Racks
Brain For Haiku That Will Knock
Them On Their Asses
https://theonion.com/japanese-monk-racksbrain-for-haiku-that-will-knockthem-on-their-asses/
Brain For Haiku That Will Knock
Them On Their Asses
https://theonion.com/japanese-monk-racksbrain-for-haiku-that-will-knockthem-on-their-asses/
Reposted by buster hawthorne
Just Six Corporations Remain https://theonion.com/just-six-corporations-remain-1819564741/
December 5, 2025 at 7:30 PM
Just Six Corporations Remain https://theonion.com/just-six-corporations-remain-1819564741/
Reposted by buster hawthorne
RFK Jr. Denies Ever Laying Eggs In Olivia Nuzzi
RFK Jr. Denies Ever Laying Eggs In Olivia Nuzzi
WASHINGTON—In an attempt to dispel rumors of an affair during the 2024 presidential campaign, Health and Human Services Secretary Robert F. Kennedy Jr. held a press conference Monday during which he d...
theonion.com
November 30, 2025 at 7:00 PM
RFK Jr. Denies Ever Laying Eggs In Olivia Nuzzi
Reposted by buster hawthorne
RFK Jr. Fires Piss Czar https://theonion.com/rfk-jr-fires-piss-czar/
November 16, 2025 at 9:00 PM
RFK Jr. Fires Piss Czar https://theonion.com/rfk-jr-fires-piss-czar/
Reposted by buster hawthorne
Breaking: The Darkness Returns
Breaking: The Darkness Returns
WASHINGTON—With deep unease and outright horror haunting millions of Americans as a great shroud enveloped the land, late-breaking reports confirmed Monday that the darkness had returned. Bystanders f...
theonion.com
November 3, 2025 at 9:00 PM
Breaking: The Darkness Returns