Barry Von Ahsen
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vonahsen.wtf
Barry Von Ahsen
@vonahsen.wtf
Linux, infosec, soccer, beer. he/him/his/el
Mediocre white man, but not making it everyone else's problem. Trans rights are human rights. Love is love. Eat the rich. BLM. ACAB.
Forget that guy falling off Nakatomi plaza, it's not Christmas until Rick James and The A-Team help Issac Hayes take down the corrupt warden, avenging Uncle Phil (also, oof x2)
December 25, 2025 at 4:59 PM
It's not a company Christmas party until the live 90s covers troubador sings "placenta"
December 7, 2025 at 1:44 AM
Respect to the WC draw director for NOT cutting to Wyclef during Lauryn's performance
December 5, 2025 at 6:10 PM
THESE RESULTS ARE TOTALLY FRAUDULENT
December 5, 2025 at 5:56 PM
"Are there any Mexicans in the [World Cup draw] room?". Trump wakes up and unleashes ICE
December 5, 2025 at 5:28 PM
🎶 The Devil went down to Georgia
He was lookin’ for a soul to steal
He was in a bind ’cause he was way behind
And he was willing to make a deal 🎶

Who is the devil's manager, busting his hump because he's not hitting his numbers? 📉
November 29, 2025 at 6:35 PM
These Wicked 2 promotions are getting out of hand
November 23, 2025 at 4:40 PM
Oh good, my USB converters came, let's open them

*Screams in Ruby Rhod*
November 7, 2025 at 7:34 PM
Damn it! I missed it
November 4, 2025 at 1:40 PM
If your food's paper is clear, it's your window to weight gain. If the bag the paper came in is clear, that's Runza!
October 27, 2025 at 12:38 AM
@thomasjrennie.bsky.social you're not just some poor schlub (crawls across the floor like Hans Gruber) you're an EXCEPTIONAL schlub
September 29, 2025 at 12:42 PM
I may regret this decision
August 22, 2025 at 3:37 PM
Nine Inch Nails in St Paul: enjoy this tarp, LOSERS
August 18, 2025 at 12:43 AM
August 5, 2025 at 9:30 PM
At a random pub near London Paddington. Luigi did nothing wrong
August 2, 2025 at 4:45 PM
With apologies to Lenny Bruce, if the UK won't let you discuss {SA, CSA, or "controlling or coercive behaviour"}, you can't discuss {credible accusations against Prince Andrew}
July 29, 2025 at 9:27 AM
The airport bar playing "cha-cha slide" at 6:45am on a Monday is TOO MUCH
July 21, 2025 at 11:44 AM
Happy "why is soccer on instead of Jim Cramer" day, to all who celebrate. I see the NBC cowards aren't interrupting the golf channel though
May 25, 2025 at 3:50 PM
@natebukaty.bsky.social like an old man at the deli, trying to send back soup!
March 30, 2025 at 10:54 PM
"Yes, let's switch MLS to the international calendar", he says, as he gets snowed/sleeted upon
March 15, 2025 at 11:35 PM
DO NOT mess with me in the midst of all of this *gestures wildly*

This is some pretty wild speculation, and that's even remembering the hype of the twenty teens
February 27, 2025 at 6:48 PM
I always love when the TV show's untraceable, unhackable piece of military grade MacGuffin tech allows unapproved devices to connect and download all contents
February 26, 2025 at 12:33 AM
"only the top 15 teams in the Big 10 qualify for the end of season tournament"
a man in a black shirt is making a funny face while sitting at a table in a dark room .
Alt: Malcolm Reynolds, captain of the Firefly class ship Serenity, hears something foolish, and raises his hand to respond. He reconsiders, and remains silent, frustrated.
media.tenor.com
February 23, 2025 at 12:36 AM
540,000 square miles of America don't have cell coverage, but they have FAR more senators than Los Angeles county, Cook county (Chicago), and Harris county (Houston)
February 10, 2025 at 12:08 AM
My $3000 shitty wok noodles, worth it
December 15, 2024 at 7:58 PM