anyway calling a complete stranger ‘sweet summer child’ should trigger a specific kind of wellness check where a paramedic shoves you in a locker

Lots of those, lots of "boomers are stupid & gen z is fried so it looks like we're the only ones smart enough to fix things 😉😉". Definitely majority gen X and millennials.

Shit maybe this place does have the juice

I have eaten a PB bagel nearly every morning for the last ten years. Sometimes it gets the day started and sometimes it's the only reason to get the day started. Highly recommend it