Zack Bornstein
@zackbornstein.bsky.social
Emmy-losing Writer/Director (#Shrinking, @nbcSNL, @Netflix, @Hulu, @Dreamworks, @JimmyKimmelLive, #StrangePlanet, @NewYorker)
just realized my cats probably think I spend 10 hours a day in the garage
November 18, 2025 at 6:31 PM
just realized my cats probably think I spend 10 hours a day in the garage
It’s truly bananas we’re expected to go about our lives eating lunch and putting on pants like the President isn’t a well documented child sex predator who was best friends with the king of child sex predators
November 17, 2025 at 7:37 PM
It’s truly bananas we’re expected to go about our lives eating lunch and putting on pants like the President isn’t a well documented child sex predator who was best friends with the king of child sex predators
CNN: Trump in Epstein files
NBC: Trump in Epstein files
ABC: Trump in Epstein files
FOX:
NBC: Trump in Epstein files
ABC: Trump in Epstein files
FOX:
November 15, 2025 at 9:00 PM
CNN: Trump in Epstein files
NBC: Trump in Epstein files
ABC: Trump in Epstein files
FOX:
NBC: Trump in Epstein files
ABC: Trump in Epstein files
FOX:
Democrats with no leverage: Give in to GOP
Democrats with all the leverage, social mandate, moral authority, clear achievable win in sight: Give in to GOP
Democrats with all the leverage, social mandate, moral authority, clear achievable win in sight: Give in to GOP
November 10, 2025 at 10:24 PM
Democrats with no leverage: Give in to GOP
Democrats with all the leverage, social mandate, moral authority, clear achievable win in sight: Give in to GOP
Democrats with all the leverage, social mandate, moral authority, clear achievable win in sight: Give in to GOP
I don’t understand why Trump’s approval rating is finally slipping when he’s building a golden ballroom at his house while actively stopping 42 million Americans from getting food stamps, 40% of whom are children
November 8, 2025 at 3:25 AM
I don’t understand why Trump’s approval rating is finally slipping when he’s building a golden ballroom at his house while actively stopping 42 million Americans from getting food stamps, 40% of whom are children
I don’t understand how Trump lost so much ground from a year ago after spending every single day making people’s lives hell while raking in $3 billion in Qatari bribes through his crypto coin
November 6, 2025 at 10:13 PM
I don’t understand how Trump lost so much ground from a year ago after spending every single day making people’s lives hell while raking in $3 billion in Qatari bribes through his crypto coin
If 3 people in a row don’t pick up your call it’s because everyone you’ve ever met is in a room together voting on your greatest flaw
November 2, 2025 at 11:00 PM
If 3 people in a row don’t pick up your call it’s because everyone you’ve ever met is in a room together voting on your greatest flaw
I don’t understand why dating is so hard, all I’m looking for is a new best friend from scratch who I’m willing to die for that must get along with all my family and friends and have comparable ambition and identical values and wild sexual chemistry with me and no else forever
October 31, 2025 at 12:22 AM
I don’t understand why dating is so hard, all I’m looking for is a new best friend from scratch who I’m willing to die for that must get along with all my family and friends and have comparable ambition and identical values and wild sexual chemistry with me and no else forever
At the end of the day, we are all Americans. Sure, we have differences on policy. One side wants to give everyone healthcare and good wages. The other wants to create a white Christian ethnostate where the president can legally assassinate anyone at will. But we are not enemies.
October 29, 2025 at 6:54 PM
At the end of the day, we are all Americans. Sure, we have differences on policy. One side wants to give everyone healthcare and good wages. The other wants to create a white Christian ethnostate where the president can legally assassinate anyone at will. But we are not enemies.
ah yes another beautiful morning, time to decide if I want to be informed and frozen in panic, or willfully ignorant with a numbing background dread
October 23, 2025 at 11:33 PM
ah yes another beautiful morning, time to decide if I want to be informed and frozen in panic, or willfully ignorant with a numbing background dread
Not gonna lie toddlers absolutely nailed it with naps, buttered noodles, and rejecting authority
October 17, 2025 at 2:56 AM
Not gonna lie toddlers absolutely nailed it with naps, buttered noodles, and rejecting authority
Hot girl summer is over. It’s divorce lawyer fall.
September 27, 2025 at 5:51 PM
Hot girl summer is over. It’s divorce lawyer fall.
me before and after seeing a tasty looking pie being sliced up
September 24, 2025 at 6:55 AM
me before and after seeing a tasty looking pie being sliced up
love to fit into this world
September 22, 2025 at 10:19 PM
love to fit into this world
if only there was some kind of amendment that could prevent this from happening. pretty important stuff too, id prolly put it first
Under threat from Trump's FCC chairman, ABC takes Jimmy Kimmel off the air for remarks on Charlie Kirk that the MAGA right deemed offensive. www.nytimes.com/2025/09/17/b...
ABC Pulls Jimmy Kimmel Off Air for Charlie Kirk Comments
www.nytimes.com
September 18, 2025 at 1:17 AM
if only there was some kind of amendment that could prevent this from happening. pretty important stuff too, id prolly put it first
Emmys 8 years apart
September 17, 2025 at 7:51 PM
Emmys 8 years apart
dirty mirror, dead inside, can’t lose
September 14, 2025 at 10:16 PM
dirty mirror, dead inside, can’t lose
There is a fly with me on this international flight, little bro has no idea how different his life is about to be
September 14, 2025 at 7:36 PM
There is a fly with me on this international flight, little bro has no idea how different his life is about to be
…just got the finger from a Waymo
September 12, 2025 at 11:49 PM
…just got the finger from a Waymo
I’d rather pay double than say that
September 12, 2025 at 5:03 PM
I’d rather pay double than say that
Trump 2024: I will be the President of peace.
Trump 2025: THE DEPARTMENT OF WAR WILL NOT REST UNTIL WE HAVE DEFEATED CHICAGO
Trump 2025: THE DEPARTMENT OF WAR WILL NOT REST UNTIL WE HAVE DEFEATED CHICAGO
September 9, 2025 at 10:34 PM
Trump 2024: I will be the President of peace.
Trump 2025: THE DEPARTMENT OF WAR WILL NOT REST UNTIL WE HAVE DEFEATED CHICAGO
Trump 2025: THE DEPARTMENT OF WAR WILL NOT REST UNTIL WE HAVE DEFEATED CHICAGO
When friends ask me to dinner after 9pm
September 7, 2025 at 5:39 PM
When friends ask me to dinner after 9pm
I’m a guy who believes more children should have measles for no reason, and I can’t tell you how refreshing it is to finally feel represented by my government
September 5, 2025 at 2:57 AM
I’m a guy who believes more children should have measles for no reason, and I can’t tell you how refreshing it is to finally feel represented by my government
who would’ve guessed that the guy whose brain has been eaten by a worm would be bad a managing our health system
September 5, 2025 at 12:59 AM
who would’ve guessed that the guy whose brain has been eaten by a worm would be bad a managing our health system
I should have been more upfront: I am MLB two-way all star Shohei Ohtani
September 4, 2025 at 10:56 PM
I should have been more upfront: I am MLB two-way all star Shohei Ohtani