Author | Lightnews

The fake Michael Bertrand

@fruvous73.bsky.social

580 followers 570 following 6.4K posts

A very strange man who writes things. VFS alum (Writing for TV and Film program), thinker, philosopher, comedy writer, academically gifted, socially retarded, lover of long lists of adjectives, and the only rationalist materialist mystic poet in the world.

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The fake Michael Bertrand @fruvous73.bsky.social · 9h

Looks like the ad really struck a nerve.

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The Nemesis @nemesisresistance.bsky.social · 1d

Holy shit 🫡🤣

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MeidasTouch @meidastouch.com · 1d

Doug Ford's ad using Reagan's words slamming tariffs just aired during the World Series

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The Ass is the father of the legs @internethippo.bsky.social · 17h

You should be able to find jobs by searching "guy who shows up on time and generally does what he's supposed to"

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The fake Michael Bertrand @fruvous73.bsky.social · 16h

I just want them to keep trying to diagnose me until they actually get a fucking diagnosis.

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Chronic Illness Humor @chronicillness.bsky.social · 20h

1 - a guy holding his face on his hand "my kink is when doctors actually care whether I live or die"

2 - a different guy talking "unrealistic. settle for bondage like the rest of us."

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Maria Bustillos @mariabustillos.com · 1d

THE WIZARD OF OZ at the Sphere in Vegas, delicately and hilariously observed by @lauriewoolever.bsky.social

flaminghydra.com/issue-430/

Tiny theatergoers before THE WIZARD OF OZ at the Las Vegas Sphere, beside the installation of 50-foot-long legs and 22-feet-tall ruby slippers

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Democrat Cats @democratcats.bsky.social · 1d

Your Moment of Cat

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The fake Michael Bertrand @fruvous73.bsky.social · 17h

"This looks like a job for.... MELVIN!"

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Tiffy Clyro (Tee Cee) @thehumanstrobe.bsky.social · 19h

Imagine there was a superhero who didn't have an alias and they were just called Steve or Bridget or something.

That would be lame.

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The fake Michael Bertrand @fruvous73.bsky.social · 17h

When it said "give him a staff", I imagined Mayor Pete wielding a staff like Gandalf, opposing some piece of Trumpist legislation by declaring, "This shall not PASS!".

The fake Michael Bertrand @fruvous73.bsky.social · 17h

I used to be able to do medium spicy.

But then my tummy got old. :(

The fake Michael Bertrand @fruvous73.bsky.social · 17h

Speaking as a lowly Canadian, I find the degree to which your system relied on traditions and understandings instead of shit people actually WROTE DOWN is appalling.

Not that it matters if nobody will enforce the rules anyway. :(

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Sue Massa @smassa.bsky.social · 1d

Haha

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Eric Smith @ericsmithrocks.bsky.social · 1d

Scorpio season!

Make someone who wronged you two decades ago into a nightmarish villain in a short story.

Start writing an entire novel simply to spite an old English teacher.

Kill some darlings that were just minding their own business.

Your time is now. ♏️

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Rosegarden54 @rosegarden54.bsky.social · 1d

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Return of the Cmonstermacques @cmonmaque.bsky.social · 1d

Every generation thinks they had it the hardest but us millennials had to survive the Ska wars. But sure, drinking from the hose was cool too or whatever