Return of the Cmonmacques
@cmonmaque.bsky.social
Un éléphant. Pour de vrai.
Pinned
With Al, no university will need to trouble themselves with pesky human students ever again. Instead they'll have Al students who are all sexy ladies with big juggs and 17 fingers. The men professors can dote on them and when they see a lady professor can shout "it's over for you!". It's a paradise
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I never understood the plot of the movie "the notebook" because if my wife had dementia, rather than go on and on about some boring love triangle in the 1940's i'd instead tell her we both met while we were members of the teenage mutant ninja turtles.
January 18, 2026 at 3:10 PM
I never understood the plot of the movie "the notebook" because if my wife had dementia, rather than go on and on about some boring love triangle in the 1940's i'd instead tell her we both met while we were members of the teenage mutant ninja turtles.
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'don draper and friends presented by lucky strike'
It’s so stupid how they called the show “mad men” when “ad men” was far more appropriate
January 18, 2026 at 4:01 PM
'don draper and friends presented by lucky strike'
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It’s so stupid how they called the show “mad men” when “ad men” was far more appropriate
January 18, 2026 at 4:34 AM
It’s so stupid how they called the show “mad men” when “ad men” was far more appropriate
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loved this movie, but amanda stole every scene she was in
January 18, 2026 at 3:48 PM
loved this movie, but amanda stole every scene she was in
“Wow it’s so wild how you look nothing like me. Best of luck on your wedding and next time it’s best to talk through my lawyer…”
If I ever became hip to the fact that the daughter of an old fling was trying to mama Mia me and three other dudes I’d swim off that Grecian island faster than you can say “Chiquitita”
January 18, 2026 at 3:38 PM
“Wow it’s so wild how you look nothing like me. Best of luck on your wedding and next time it’s best to talk through my lawyer…”
If I ever became hip to the fact that the daughter of an old fling was trying to mama Mia me and three other dudes I’d swim off that Grecian island faster than you can say “Chiquitita”
January 18, 2026 at 3:37 PM
If I ever became hip to the fact that the daughter of an old fling was trying to mama Mia me and three other dudes I’d swim off that Grecian island faster than you can say “Chiquitita”
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(Also true of their stage musical versions [since I'm sure you were wondering])
If you listen to facts and logic and are a reasonable person you'll clearly see that big fish makes the notebook irrelevant and you shouldn't bother with that movie anymore
January 18, 2026 at 3:30 PM
(Also true of their stage musical versions [since I'm sure you were wondering])
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we never should’ve let cars get bigger than this
December 10, 2025 at 7:30 AM
we never should’ve let cars get bigger than this
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Nick must have heard Epstein fucked dudes too
January 18, 2026 at 3:23 PM
Nick must have heard Epstein fucked dudes too
"No i'm not a contrarian buffoon, i just love saying how cool Hitler and Jeffrey Epstein were! Yknow why? BOLD TRUTHS! Also I hate whatever movie you say you like...."
January 18, 2026 at 3:23 PM
"No i'm not a contrarian buffoon, i just love saying how cool Hitler and Jeffrey Epstein were! Yknow why? BOLD TRUTHS! Also I hate whatever movie you say you like...."
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she's good as shit, I'm glad. I loved Things heard & seen or whatever it was called and In Time with Timberlake she looked totally different in that. I'm glad cause I like her
January 18, 2026 at 3:11 PM
she's good as shit, I'm glad. I loved Things heard & seen or whatever it was called and In Time with Timberlake she looked totally different in that. I'm glad cause I like her
I never understood the plot of the movie "the notebook" because if my wife had dementia, rather than go on and on about some boring love triangle in the 1940's i'd instead tell her we both met while we were members of the teenage mutant ninja turtles.
January 18, 2026 at 3:10 PM
I never understood the plot of the movie "the notebook" because if my wife had dementia, rather than go on and on about some boring love triangle in the 1940's i'd instead tell her we both met while we were members of the teenage mutant ninja turtles.
Reposted by Return of the Cmonmacques
i think the mayor of america’s woke wife being the hottest woman alive killed the movement
January 18, 2026 at 3:08 PM
i think the mayor of america’s woke wife being the hottest woman alive killed the movement
I've always been a bit of an iconoclast, like that time I tried to make a dog smoke cigarettes
January 18, 2026 at 3:08 PM
I've always been a bit of an iconoclast, like that time I tried to make a dog smoke cigarettes
So, the housemaid was indeed a banger and I think it's funny that Sidney Sweeney keeps being this barometer for whether or not "woke" is dead and if that's the case, this movie proves woke is back and absolutely on a warpath of some serious fucking revenge.
January 18, 2026 at 3:05 PM
So, the housemaid was indeed a banger and I think it's funny that Sidney Sweeney keeps being this barometer for whether or not "woke" is dead and if that's the case, this movie proves woke is back and absolutely on a warpath of some serious fucking revenge.
This movie left me with a lot of societal questions about Sidney's truly incredible tits. They sure were something!
My wife wants to see that new Amanda seyfried murder mystery movie which just so happens to be the Sidney Sweeney movie where she got tig-ol-bitties
January 18, 2026 at 3:01 PM
This movie left me with a lot of societal questions about Sidney's truly incredible tits. They sure were something!
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My lawyer: “they leaked your discord chat”
Me: “oh my god!!! What did they find?”
Lawyer: “it’s when you sent a picture of yourself in a new outfit and asked if you looked fat and nobody replied”
Me: “I see. Did you see the picture?”
Lawyer: “yes”
Me: “did you think I looked fat?”
Lawyer: “…”
Me: “oh my god!!! What did they find?”
Lawyer: “it’s when you sent a picture of yourself in a new outfit and asked if you looked fat and nobody replied”
Me: “I see. Did you see the picture?”
Lawyer: “yes”
Me: “did you think I looked fat?”
Lawyer: “…”
November 8, 2025 at 5:02 AM
My lawyer: “they leaked your discord chat”
Me: “oh my god!!! What did they find?”
Lawyer: “it’s when you sent a picture of yourself in a new outfit and asked if you looked fat and nobody replied”
Me: “I see. Did you see the picture?”
Lawyer: “yes”
Me: “did you think I looked fat?”
Lawyer: “…”
Me: “oh my god!!! What did they find?”
Lawyer: “it’s when you sent a picture of yourself in a new outfit and asked if you looked fat and nobody replied”
Me: “I see. Did you see the picture?”
Lawyer: “yes”
Me: “did you think I looked fat?”
Lawyer: “…”
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This image alone should be used to teach future generations about the 1990’s
remembering when steven seagal dressed like a doctor to visit victims of the terror attack in moscow in 2024
November 25, 2025 at 7:36 AM
This image alone should be used to teach future generations about the 1990’s
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MFW I accidentally watch a full infomercial advertisement on youtube for a pair of "future scissors":
December 9, 2025 at 11:54 PM
MFW I accidentally watch a full infomercial advertisement on youtube for a pair of "future scissors":
LMAO
January 18, 2026 at 1:49 PM
LMAO
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For some reason, the jokes on the "golden girls" are very similar to the jokes on "modern family". No way of knowing why...
January 18, 2026 at 1:47 PM
For some reason, the jokes on the "golden girls" are very similar to the jokes on "modern family". No way of knowing why...
Bluesky was bold enough for eating a cum filled sandwich, but would bluesky be bold enough to eat cum filled cream of wheat, AKA regular cream of wheat?
January 18, 2026 at 1:45 PM
Bluesky was bold enough for eating a cum filled sandwich, but would bluesky be bold enough to eat cum filled cream of wheat, AKA regular cream of wheat?
Had a wonderful matinee with my wife and now i'm cooking potato and leek soup cuz i'm silly like that.
January 18, 2026 at 12:39 PM
Had a wonderful matinee with my wife and now i'm cooking potato and leek soup cuz i'm silly like that.