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Jeff Mac

@jeffmacishere.bsky.social

1.2K followers 500 following 12K posts

claustrophiliac, desert hermit, avid indoorsman, probably playing Starfield (alt txt of banner is a weirdo headless guitar I made. It's finished in Honda Fit Orange)

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Jeff Mac @jeffmacishere.bsky.social · Jan 17

swear to god, if it turns out I'm currently "living my best life" I am going to be fucking furious

Jeff Mac @jeffmacishere.bsky.social · 3h

ok, but what if it turns out there's a downside?

Jeff Mac @jeffmacishere.bsky.social · 3h

yeah, it doesn't feel super respectful, now that you say that.

Jeff Mac @jeffmacishere.bsky.social · 3h

I can tell something's up b/c every week Blue Apron is like "Hi chef! We made some substitutions in your order!"

and it's like it was supposed to have white rice and they just put in a maybe-used moccasin.

Jeff Mac @jeffmacishere.bsky.social · 3h

it's easy to say that now. pie smell does things to a person. you would hardly recognize yourself

Reposted by Jeff Mac

The Ass is the father of the legs @internethippo.bsky.social · 12h

If I caught the scent of a delicious pie cooling on a windowsill I wouldn't float towards it helplessly. I would continue on to whatever business I had that day

Jeff Mac @jeffmacishere.bsky.social · 4h

"Young City Slickers" (2028)

four middle aged children do a cattle drive to deal with their mid childhood crises. Billy Crystal is in it, but they de-age him with CGI so he looks like the old six flags dancing old asshole except very, very young.

Jeff Mac @jeffmacishere.bsky.social · 4h

"Young Karate Kid" (2027)

A kid (no a younger kid, younger than you were picturing) learns very young karate by accident while working for an old guy (though less old than you're picturing) for free.

Jeff Mac @jeffmacishere.bsky.social · 4h

"Young Freddy" (2026) A young ice cream man with stars in his eyes experiences heartache and turns to a life of knife gloves.

Jeff Mac @jeffmacishere.bsky.social · 4h

"Young Jaws" (2025) A young, idealistic shark becomes disillusioned in his music career and turns to a life of eating

Jeff Mac @jeffmacishere.bsky.social · 4h

I don’t know what it is, but whatever it is, I’ve got it. These m’fers LURVE me.

Jeff Mac @jeffmacishere.bsky.social · 4h

honestly, they could just ask

Reposted by Jeff Mac

NosferaPru @prufrockluvsong.bsky.social · 4h

I confess wild horses COULD drag me away. In fact it would only probably take a single very sickly one

Jeff Mac @jeffmacishere.bsky.social · 7h

This shit drives me insane. It’s like, there are lots and lots of very nice people who look just like Kristi Noem. Or Trump or any of them.

Of all the despicable shit there is to note about these ppl, how any of that stuff makes the list is beyond me.

Jeff Mac @jeffmacishere.bsky.social · 9h

If hole not for Sherman, then why Sherman-shaped? Huh?

AmeriKraut @inchargeofthegirls.bsky.social · 1d

sherman, for the love of god!

Reposted by Jeff Mac

Jeff Mac @jeffmacishere.bsky.social · 13h

false frog operation

Jeff Mac @jeffmacishere.bsky.social · 10h

duh, the A stands for “A.I.” and the I is for “Information”

Reposted by Jeff Mac

Assistant HR Director of Antifa @sethdmichaels.bsky.social · 13h

AI HUCKSTER: "i built you a machine that reads books for you."

ME: "can you build me a machine that unloads the dishwasher for me so *i* can read a book?"

Reposted by Jeff Mac

cait (and adonis) @cait.bsky.social · 13h

"well what are the Democrats supposed to do" I don't know! They're supposed to know! I'm not the one who sought and obtained a political position that would require me to know what to do when the ruling party attempts to install the President as a dictator!

Jeff Mac @jeffmacishere.bsky.social · 13h

Robin, no! that's for retirement!

Reposted by Jeff Mac

Diane Galloway @adgwatches.bsky.social · 13h

The revolution will probably be televised as it turns out

Jeff Mac @jeffmacishere.bsky.social · 13h

false frog operation

Reposted by Jeff Mac

hannah gais @hannahgais.bsky.social · 14h

Those are three people in inflatable frog suits.

@MrAndyNgo
Now that the local and national press have started to cover the Portland ICE area round-the-clock in reaction to the President, Antifa have devised a plan where they are encouraging one another to come in animal costumes.

The costumes serve the function of masking the violent extremism to make the direct action appear like a family-friendly gathering on camera, and to whitewash the past ultraviolence.

In 2019, Antifa devised a similar plot by giving out free "milkshakes" at a protest. But they couldn't contain their bloodthirst and nearly killed me when they saw me. In 2020, they mobilized a fake "Wall of Moms" where female Antifa supporters and members wore yellow shirts to act as human body shields while violent rioters behind them hurled projectile weapons.

photo of three people in inflatable frog costumes

Jeff Mac @jeffmacishere.bsky.social · 14h

definitely need at LEAST a slightly more flatteringly shaped coat hanger.

Jeff Mac @jeffmacishere.bsky.social · 14h

yeah, seems like there are more than a couple, erm, "enthusiasts of caucasian culture" out there?

Jeff Mac @jeffmacishere.bsky.social · 15h

to..to build a what at the fucking where?

Aaron Rupar @atrupar.com · 19h

Hegseth: "I'm also proud that today we're signing a letter of acceptance to build a Qatari Emeri air force facility at the Mountain Home Airbase in Idaho."