Machine Gun Skelly
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varsityathlete.bsky.social
Machine Gun Skelly
@varsityathlete.bsky.social
320 followers 130 following 2.1K posts
Has always denied being a member of PoshArsenalTwitter or participating in any hating Coquelin and making it really obvious. Further denies any involvement in the slander of Bruce Rioja.
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Master list of mute and blocklists, where you can organise by topic, size, date, etc. and ensure you don't see content you find abhorrent, annoying, tedious, or you would simply rather not learn about against your will due to someone else putting it on your TL:

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Baleba performance that convinces Sir Jim Chemistry Teacher to drop £100m on him and a Welbeck winner, please barkeep.
The first fixture I checked when Xhaka signed for Sunderland wasn't when he'd play us, but rather when he'd face Newcastle. I wanna see what he has planned for Bruno G and Joelinton.

(Sunday 14 December, in case you're wondering)
Fair play to Sunderland. Nobody thought they would have had the 3rd best defensive record in the league almost a quarter of the way through the season.

Surprisingly fun 2nd half, capped by a budget version of the Arshavin Barcelona goal
Was lovely to see he clearly remembers some of what he was taught in Dark Arts training sessions back in the day
Brian Brobbey, with your name like Scooby Doo attempting to say Mr Blobby
Reposted by Machine Gun Skelly
Carlos Cuesta's Parma hold Cesc Fàbregas' Como side to a 0-0 draw. Como with 71% possession, Parma outshoot them 10-6 anyway. Exactly how I'd expect a Arteta-Wenger protégé derby to play out.
Had an idea for a heartwarming animated Christmas film, loosely inspired by John Wick, Kung Fu Panda, and Madagascar 2.

The Rhinos, Elephants and all the other lads Ramsey has supported since his time in Africa team up to help him find / avenge his missing dog.

bsky.app/profile/rgun...
Reposted by Machine Gun Skelly
Tips on making the point land:

• only respond about brands you like + Visit Rwanda
• Really love those brands, and hate VR

• On how did you hear about Visit Rwanda, click other. Use the free text box to voice opposition to the deal being renewed.
If you have opinions on this and are on the club's mailing list there was an e-mail sent out today surveying fans about attitudes towards their brand partners.

surveys.arsenal.com/jfe/form/SV_...
With that moustache and haircut, he could be a prime villain to get bumped off in the Eastenders Christmas special as part of a whodunnit, or a failed consortium leader for a buyout of an in-trouble football league side
Reposted by Machine Gun Skelly
Taker is being bullied worse than Kaval in Laycool:
Can I put you in touch with some lads from the Very Legitimate and Morally Sound Rwanda Tourism board? Apparently they’re after a London club for sleeve sponsorship…
what’s better than Guys Being Dudes?

Guys Being Dudes over KeshExpress
(I’m re-watching All Or Nothing and XL Gabi is spending an upsetting amount of time with Lacazette, Uberyang and the French speakers.

Further improving his English, making friends with serious players, and his lil trip to Turkey really did revolutionise that man’s life. And all of ours, tbh)
He deserves credit himself for how he’s applied himself. But consider how Gabriel has become A Serious Person and suppressed and ultimately eliminated his Bozo Gene tendencies since the influence of The Chuckle Brothers at this cloob waned, then how he went supernova following their departures.
Second striker in a Simeone style 44F2. I know he has that arc in him. Maybe not here, maybe not even at Atletico themselves, but somewhere.
Just burst out laughing remembering Lacazette’s ‘traumatised Unc round the camp fire’ tale from the Amazon documentary, so I thought I’d bless your Fridays by reminding you of its existence. All the best.
Reposted by Machine Gun Skelly
Spend your Friday lunchtime reading The Football Manager 2026 beta meltdowns. Absolutely worth it.
Reposted by Machine Gun Skelly
Very encouraging that Max Dowman's scholarship, leading to a first pro contract, is agreed. With the best youth there is always a risk they will be lured away. Arsenal have been smart in handling his elevation by mixing a special amount of opportunity and care.

www.nytimes.com/athletic/674...
Arsenal had to make a special case for Max Dowman – his super talent merits it
Arsenal have managed to sign the 15-year-old to scholarship terms. A professional contract is expected to follow when he turns 17...
www.nytimes.com
Finally clocked who Cole Palmer reminds me of.

Superb ball striking, decent as a transition attacker on the counter, below average movement without the ball, subpar defensive contribution.

Nicolas Pepé with elite PR
Reposted by Machine Gun Skelly
'One month ahead of the Aston Villa game, which I needed to go perfectly, the Maccabi fans were running riot. I saw this as a positive. The more they got the rioting out of their system, the less chance they would want to riot on the streets of Birmingham.'
Reposted by Machine Gun Skelly
'The plan? Stake our entire reputation on a huge group of Maccabi Tel Aviv hooligans behaving themselves.'
Correct! A lovely win vs Everton, with goals from Giroud and Koscielny to put us top of the league, days after we’d beaten Bayern.

Everything seemed to be set.

Then everyone’s hamstrings exploded in Sheffield the following week.