daisy van blair
@agentdaisy.bsky.social
I am employed. | Roleplay | #AGENCY | mdni
Pinned
GUYS IT'S EXPANDING
February 1, 2026 at 7:39 PM
GUYS IT'S EXPANDING
( Lie; failed. )
N-nah, it- it doesn't.
N-nah, it- it doesn't.
aw, geez . . . how am i gonna get into the restaurant now? it's no shirt no shoes no service, and on greek tuesday, too!
well thanks anyway, ma'am . . . hey, you should be careful, ma'am, your shirt looks exactly like mine.
well thanks anyway, ma'am . . . hey, you should be careful, ma'am, your shirt looks exactly like mine.
UHHHHHHHH
...
N- no?
...
N- no?
February 1, 2026 at 7:25 PM
( Lie; failed. )
N-nah, it- it doesn't.
N-nah, it- it doesn't.
UHHHHHHHH
...
N- no?
...
N- no?
hey has anyone seen my shirt i think i left it here while i was going for a swim . . .
February 1, 2026 at 7:21 PM
UHHHHHHHH
...
N- no?
...
N- no?
You miss ONE dose of hrt...
Joel it's getting thicker!!! It's becoming solid again!!!
February 1, 2026 at 7:02 PM
You miss ONE dose of hrt...
LOUD BLENDING SOUNDS IN BACKGROUND
Hey yeah uhhhh quick question I wanna get a couple of these for work, how do they hold up against *juices*? 'Cos, I mean, I gotta say, there's a lotta juices in my line of work.
We have loads of succulents! Even those without a green thumb can take care of these babies easily.
February 1, 2026 at 6:52 PM
LOUD BLENDING SOUNDS IN BACKGROUND
Missing me.
Who knows what I'm doing when I'm not with you, Daisy?
How would you know?
January 14, 2026 at 4:42 PM
Missing me.
How would you know?
( Hassam suddenly has his little European espresso in its little cup and saucer. )
You're quite right. It's inconvenient to have to do anything yourself, by hand, isn't it?
You're quite right. It's inconvenient to have to do anything yourself, by hand, isn't it?
I'm sitting down now...
I couldn't just *get back up*.
I couldn't just *get back up*.
January 14, 2026 at 7:12 AM
How would you know?
I'm sitting down now...
I couldn't just *get back up*.
I couldn't just *get back up*.
You're not scared of a McDonald's worker, are you?
Ha ha ha.
( Seems for a moment to be seriously considering it. )
It's fine.
It's fine.
( Seems for a moment to be seriously considering it. )
It's fine.
It's fine.
January 14, 2026 at 7:05 AM
I'm sitting down now...
I couldn't just *get back up*.
I couldn't just *get back up*.
Ha ha ha.
( Seems for a moment to be seriously considering it. )
It's fine.
It's fine.
( Seems for a moment to be seriously considering it. )
It's fine.
It's fine.
Don't be scared. If you want a toy, go into the McDonald's and ask for one.
No, they can't forget, it's in the constitution, it's IN THE CONSTITUTION
January 14, 2026 at 7:02 AM
Ha ha ha.
( Seems for a moment to be seriously considering it. )
It's fine.
It's fine.
( Seems for a moment to be seriously considering it. )
It's fine.
It's fine.
This is the worst day of my life.
January 14, 2026 at 7:00 AM
This is the worst day of my life.
No, they can't forget, it's in the constitution, it's IN THE CONSTITUTION
Please, eat your Happy Meal. It's a shame they forgot to give you a toy. The service at these American restaurants gets worse by the year.
Whoa!
But how did you— how did you...?
But how did you— how did you...?
January 14, 2026 at 6:59 AM
No, they can't forget, it's in the constitution, it's IN THE CONSTITUTION
Hey where's my toy
Better is a poor Valerie who walks in her integrity than a rich Valerie who is crooked in her ways.
I bought you a Happy Meal. Do you eat meat? The toys, at the moment, are Bakugan and Only Hearts Pets, so I bought two and gave one to Daisy without a toy in it.
I bought you a Happy Meal. Do you eat meat? The toys, at the moment, are Bakugan and Only Hearts Pets, so I bought two and gave one to Daisy without a toy in it.
<- Has never possessed any sort of money in her life.
January 14, 2026 at 6:57 AM
Hey where's my toy
Whoa!
But how did you— how did you...?
But how did you— how did you...?
( Somehow NOT his smarmiest voice?) Look again.
I could go take a look in the Storage Room?
January 14, 2026 at 6:54 AM
Whoa!
But how did you— how did you...?
But how did you— how did you...?
I could go take a look in the Storage Room?
So it was. And there's no more?
That was the next one.
January 14, 2026 at 6:51 AM
I could go take a look in the Storage Room?
That was the next one.
Nevermind, Daisy. Accidents happen. Onto the next one, no?
it axeploded
January 14, 2026 at 6:45 AM
That was the next one.
Had a dream where my titties were so big I couldn't fit into any of my clothes any more what does this mean? @cartomancing.bsky.social
January 4, 2026 at 8:06 PM
Had a dream where my titties were so big I couldn't fit into any of my clothes any more what does this mean? @cartomancing.bsky.social
I don't think those were normal brownies.
January 3, 2026 at 7:40 AM
I don't think those were normal brownies.
I also want this guy's wife
December 27, 2025 at 9:08 PM
I also want this guy's wife
They have a government mandated nap time over there.
The moral of this story is that people from Spain are fucking WEIRD.
December 27, 2025 at 1:30 PM
They have a government mandated nap time over there.
By my thirties my titties will be so big and round.
Yeah, in . . . ( Doing the math. )
2026. Wait, no. 2023. And when you do, I'm not gonna be there, and you're gonna be so fuckin' sad and miserable 'cos you bullied me to death. Gonna gouge your eyes out or some shit.
2026. Wait, no. 2023. And when you do, I'm not gonna be there, and you're gonna be so fuckin' sad and miserable 'cos you bullied me to death. Gonna gouge your eyes out or some shit.
That doesn't *sound* true. Are you sure?
December 27, 2025 at 12:06 AM
By my thirties my titties will be so big and round.
I will never die.
December 27, 2025 at 12:01 AM
I will never die.
That doesn't *sound* true. Are you sure?
Look, one day, you'll be thirty-four. And when that happens, you'll wish you were a lot nicer.
I never said your name...
December 27, 2025 at 12:01 AM
That doesn't *sound* true. Are you sure?
This is about Joel.
He's a middle aged man.
December 26, 2025 at 11:58 PM
This is about Joel.