Beep Thief
@beepthief.bsky.social
68 followers 51 following 580 posts
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beepthief.bsky.social
I had a serious girlfriend in elementary school and then realistically did not have another serious girlfriend til college.
beepthief.bsky.social
Just saw my mother, while driving, answer my father’s phone call for the express purpose of telling him to get off the phone because when there’s a connection it obscures the map on the car screen. Incredible marriage.
beepthief.bsky.social
No political winds will ever affect my personal contempt for all cops. It’s not even principled; it’s just disgust.
beepthief.bsky.social
I straight up do not care about Diane Keaton. Artless vibe merchant.
beepthief.bsky.social
I tipped the Von M piano player to play “Baby Elephant Walk” until you left.
beepthief.bsky.social
You wouldn’t be allowed inside Von Maur. You’re Dillards, tops.
beepthief.bsky.social
I think I have now killed over one thousand dollars’ worth of rhododendrons this year.
beepthief.bsky.social
Oh my god Jack flaherty
beepthief.bsky.social
Back when we were kids the Pattern was warm, but now the Pattern is colder.
beepthief.bsky.social
“What the frick I thought you were a woman not a human!!! 💔”
beepthief.bsky.social
The Sting has about five minutes of misfortune and then the entire rest of the movie is a series of escalating triumphs for our protagonists. This is what movies should be. Movies aren’t books.
beepthief.bsky.social
Sorry to be crude but I suspect that man had gotten used to jacking off his penis to Ms Rachel and got frustrated when he found he no longer could. Absolutely non sequitur comment about her “personality”(????) being deficient is vintage incel analysis.
beepthief.bsky.social
Congratulations Mr Biden on your presidency.
beepthief.bsky.social
Can’t decide if a grim GoT style show about the founders and constitutional convention would do better or worse than a The Crown style show about the same, possibly starting w declaration and moving through the various documents and conferences
beepthief.bsky.social
Why sing if you got it
beepthief.bsky.social
Official background color for high performing clicksters and websurfers
beepthief.bsky.social
We are going to finally conquer freedom.
beepthief.bsky.social
I need to start a Cameo-like company that matches up sick kids with rehabbing athletes. 5 bucks for a kid with chickenpox. 500 for leukemia. Yeah do it for Kaelynn he has pediatric gout.
beepthief.bsky.social
There’s a guy in town w a Japanese forest green Jeep Cherokee from the 90s so it has the wheel on the right side because someone in the family was a rural letter carrier and it’s probably the most beautiful car I’ve ever seen.
beepthief.bsky.social
Montessoroid prayer: EVERYTHING IN ITS PLACE; ALL THINGS HAVE A NUMBER.
beepthief.bsky.social
Forgot I had a picture of this very moment
beepthief.bsky.social
Gary Condit silent partner