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Zombie Cantard Shambling for US Texas District 21

@cantard.bsky.social

240 followers 54 following 6.8K posts

Accountant, 3.5 wizard, lover of giant fighting robots. Bringing Honesty, Integrity, and Dignity back to Congress.

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Zombie Cantard Shambling for US Texas District 21 @cantard.bsky.social · Mar 4

I'm running for Chip Roy's seat. Once I have 500 signatures for my district I'll open a formal BlueSky campaign account.

Progress: 1% toward goal. Will update once a week.

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Zombie Cantard Shambling for US Texas District 21 @cantard.bsky.social · 4m

Do we know why? With bin Laden hiding out there, I always assumed Pakistan was tolerant to neutral toward Al Qaeda and the Taliban.

Zombie Cantard Shambling for US Texas District 21 @cantard.bsky.social · 10m

Don't always agree with them, but getting into the technical discussions is just a treat. Their review of The Thing, the practical shots, mat paintings, puppets, etc is just great content.

Zombie Cantard Shambling for US Texas District 21 @cantard.bsky.social · 13m

Doge guy: Marrying an Indian? EW. My white purity.
Vance: Look, we all make mistakes and shouldn't be held responsible for things we did years ago.
Reporter: Last week
Vance: days go.

Zombie Cantard Shambling for US Texas District 21 @cantard.bsky.social · 15m

"No one on the Republican side is taking pleasure in this scenario."

We checked in on the White House slashing jobs and programs:

a man in a suit is dancing in front of a six flags bus

ALT: a man in a suit is dancing in front of a six flags bus

media.tenor.com

Zombie Cantard Shambling for US Texas District 21 @cantard.bsky.social · 31m

Them: Democrats are violent freaks who should police their ranks and tone down the situation.
Politico: Here is documented evidence of Republicans being violent freaks.
Them: That's playful banter and we won't do anything about it.

Zombie Cantard Shambling for US Texas District 21 @cantard.bsky.social · 1h

Ceder Fever is a joyous time every year when you get a pounding headache, drainage, coughing, bronchitis, and a yearning for the sweet release of death.

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Zombie Cantard Shambling for US Texas District 21 @cantard.bsky.social · 1h

Why give updates when wild speculation of a conspiracy by your political enemies fits the narrative?

Zombie Cantard Shambling for US Texas District 21 @cantard.bsky.social · 1h

How's the plaque honoring the Capitol police going? Still not hung?

Zombie Cantard Shambling for US Texas District 21 @cantard.bsky.social · 1h

It's a typo, but RFK Jr trying to sexily read the IIA standards would be objectively horrifying.

Zombie Cantard Shambling for US Texas District 21 @cantard.bsky.social · 2h

I see a waterfall, I'm a gonna take a look. It's that Pavolian spirit of exploration in me.

Zombie Cantard Shambling for US Texas District 21 @cantard.bsky.social · 2h

RFK Jr should narrate an erotic audit book so he can solve America's porn addition by eliminating its sex drive.

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Zombie Cantard Shambling for US Texas District 21 @cantard.bsky.social · 2h

My Commissar knew how to maintain operational discipline, and that was by not sexually harassing the Navigator who could melt my face off with a look.

Zombie Cantard Shambling for US Texas District 21 @cantard.bsky.social · 21h

Imagine telling people that a foreign power will only give you gifts if you choose who they want as your leader.

It's not like Argentina is a former colony of a European power that threw off its shackles for self-determination or anything.

Zombie Cantard Shambling for US Texas District 21 @cantard.bsky.social · 21h

ChatGTP is going to treat adults like adults...unless you want ChatGTP to live Sam Altman's fetishes in your chat.

Zombie Cantard Shambling for US Texas District 21 @cantard.bsky.social · 23h

Missed the boat of Ghost of Tsushima and giving it go in the afternoons. I LOL'd when I saw it had a Kurasawa mode.

Take my vengeance on the Mongols? Pressing I'm sure. But first I must follow the wind to every hot springs in the land. And chase foxes.

Zombie Cantard Shambling for US Texas District 21 @cantard.bsky.social · 23h

It's funny because they didn't show any antisemitic threads. Just people calling her an inexperienced, unethical right-wing hack.

Also, Fox News knocking CBS for not being about disseminating information is a gut-buster of hypocrisy.

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Zombie Cantard Shambling for US Texas District 21 @cantard.bsky.social · 1d

"We're saving the family unit" is always rich from people whose flagship personality is a thrice-married adulterer.

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Zombie Cantard Shambling for US Texas District 21 @cantard.bsky.social · 1d

The Biden campaign mentioning non-consensual nudes of Hunter violating Twitter's terms is inappropriate government censorship.

But the DOJ explicitly working with Facebook to remove content monitoring government activities is just fine.

Zombie Cantard Shambling for US Texas District 21 @cantard.bsky.social · 1d

Always with the vague hand waving.

Zombie Cantard Shambling for US Texas District 21 @cantard.bsky.social · 1d

Bowser: I'm lightning in a bottle, an earthquake in a can!

[Meets Mallow]

bowser and kirby are standing next to each other on a gray surface .

Alt: Bowser and a Mallow substitute.

media.tenor.com

Zombie Cantard Shambling for US Texas District 21 @cantard.bsky.social · 1d

'We shall ascend to the stars and leave the petty bigotry and racism of humanity behind.'

[Meets the Ravagers] Well looky what we got here boys! We got some Terrans and a Can-ay-dian.

Zombie Cantard Shambling for US Texas District 21 @cantard.bsky.social · 1d

Current event podcasts get too full of doom and gloom. Taking a week out for some storytelling does a body good.

Zombie Cantard Shambling for US Texas District 21 @cantard.bsky.social · 1d

The smart underpants provide the notification is the voice of the Protoss adjutant:

'YOUR UNDERPANTS ARE UNDER ATTACK!','WE REQUIRE CLEAN UNDERPATHS.','YOUR UNDERPANTS ARE DEPLEATED!'

Zombie Cantard Shambling for US Texas District 21 @cantard.bsky.social · 1d

'How did that man get to become a Captain in the US army?!?'

-'He was drafted.'

Zombie Cantard Shambling for US Texas District 21 @cantard.bsky.social · 1d

Isn't it a pretty serious crime to threaten to kill an emergency responder?

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