the bareback contessa (festive edition)
@capitaloftexas.bsky.social
austin. he/him. 30-something texan transplanted to minnesota. professional musician and even more professional faggot. 🏳️🌈
all other socials: carillonghorn
(this account is very nsfw so you know me in real life… look away)
all other socials: carillonghorn
(this account is very nsfw so you know me in real life… look away)
it’s not christmas ‘til you hear The Chord™️ 🎅🏻
(i’d say not to tell my teacher how much i look at my feet bc you’re not supposed to but she’s dead rip)
(i’d say not to tell my teacher how much i look at my feet bc you’re not supposed to but she’s dead rip)
December 15, 2025 at 12:41 AM
it’s not christmas ‘til you hear The Chord™️ 🎅🏻
(i’d say not to tell my teacher how much i look at my feet bc you’re not supposed to but she’s dead rip)
(i’d say not to tell my teacher how much i look at my feet bc you’re not supposed to but she’s dead rip)
fletch be like
December 14, 2025 at 11:06 PM
fletch be like
i survived today, praise be
had some of the hardest music i’ve ever had to play at my church job. I’m not a good enough organist for that shit 😂
had some of the hardest music i’ve ever had to play at my church job. I’m not a good enough organist for that shit 😂
December 14, 2025 at 10:31 PM
i survived today, praise be
had some of the hardest music i’ve ever had to play at my church job. I’m not a good enough organist for that shit 😂
had some of the hardest music i’ve ever had to play at my church job. I’m not a good enough organist for that shit 😂
Reposted by the bareback contessa (festive edition)
I have best friends and I have worst friends. And a worst friend is a best friend who their whole job is to make you worse (for the better) like for me my worst friend is my angry friend cuz she’s right, I do need to be meaner and get angry and shit and I love her for that
December 9, 2025 at 8:22 PM
I have best friends and I have worst friends. And a worst friend is a best friend who their whole job is to make you worse (for the better) like for me my worst friend is my angry friend cuz she’s right, I do need to be meaner and get angry and shit and I love her for that
also i have a gi consult in an hour to talk about what tf is happening with my gut
what if they tell me i can’t eat anything good ever again 😩
what if they tell me i can’t eat anything good ever again 😩
December 9, 2025 at 7:44 PM
also i have a gi consult in an hour to talk about what tf is happening with my gut
what if they tell me i can’t eat anything good ever again 😩
what if they tell me i can’t eat anything good ever again 😩
can i just go on the record and say i hate leftovers
like that’s p much a blanket statement
like that’s p much a blanket statement
December 9, 2025 at 7:43 PM
can i just go on the record and say i hate leftovers
like that’s p much a blanket statement
like that’s p much a blanket statement
December 9, 2025 at 5:20 PM
Reposted by the bareback contessa (festive edition)
y’all @piandcake.bsky.social is being homophobic and sending me really sexy snaps even though he’s in england and not in minnesota spitting in my mouth :(
December 9, 2025 at 12:21 AM
y’all @piandcake.bsky.social is being homophobic and sending me really sexy snaps even though he’s in england and not in minnesota spitting in my mouth :(
hairy pits? hairy pits. 🤤
December 8, 2025 at 11:02 PM
hairy pits? hairy pits. 🤤
call me bitchy and/or a boomer but i feel like it should be illegal to have unsubscribe buttons/links on a website or in an email that don’t actually work
it should also be legal to firebomb those companies’ headquarters, but that’s a different story
it should also be legal to firebomb those companies’ headquarters, but that’s a different story
December 8, 2025 at 10:09 PM
call me bitchy and/or a boomer but i feel like it should be illegal to have unsubscribe buttons/links on a website or in an email that don’t actually work
it should also be legal to firebomb those companies’ headquarters, but that’s a different story
it should also be legal to firebomb those companies’ headquarters, but that’s a different story
am toasty, yay
December 8, 2025 at 1:40 AM
am toasty, yay
i’m waiting for an edible to kick in, just doordashed dinner from my favorite chinese place, and am finna jerk off. take that, sunday scaries ✌🏻
December 8, 2025 at 12:06 AM
i’m waiting for an edible to kick in, just doordashed dinner from my favorite chinese place, and am finna jerk off. take that, sunday scaries ✌🏻
Reposted by the bareback contessa (festive edition)
Happy Sunday, Sluts
December 7, 2025 at 10:40 PM
Happy Sunday, Sluts
Reposted by the bareback contessa (festive edition)
I love gay people and faggotry <3
December 7, 2025 at 7:20 AM
I love gay people and faggotry <3
btw if we’re bloomfs you’re automatically hot and sexy and cute fyi
December 7, 2025 at 3:42 PM
btw if we’re bloomfs you’re automatically hot and sexy and cute fyi
it was a rough night but am feeling a bit better yay
December 7, 2025 at 3:12 PM
it was a rough night but am feeling a bit better yay
i think i might have food poisoning help 🤮
December 7, 2025 at 6:38 AM
i think i might have food poisoning help 🤮
Reposted by the bareback contessa (festive edition)
I need to be used by a group of men who smell nice. This is the policy issue I need to be solved.
December 7, 2025 at 6:34 AM
I need to be used by a group of men who smell nice. This is the policy issue I need to be solved.
y’all i really really want the lego notre-dame 😩
December 7, 2025 at 3:08 AM
y’all i really really want the lego notre-dame 😩
this is a #foreskin friday post since it’s soft but happy weekend from my leaky cock 💦
(btw my precum is very tasty in case you were wondering)
(btw my precum is very tasty in case you were wondering)
December 6, 2025 at 12:17 AM
this is a #foreskin friday post since it’s soft but happy weekend from my leaky cock 💦
(btw my precum is very tasty in case you were wondering)
(btw my precum is very tasty in case you were wondering)
why does my left nipple hurt when all i’ve done today is sit at my desk and do work shit
December 5, 2025 at 9:26 PM
why does my left nipple hurt when all i’ve done today is sit at my desk and do work shit
Reposted by the bareback contessa (festive edition)
actual text i just sent my best friend:
“why are period poops the worst??”
“why are period poops the worst??”
December 5, 2025 at 1:30 AM
actual text i just sent my best friend:
“why are period poops the worst??”
“why are period poops the worst??”
my tummy hurts today but i’m being so brave about it 😔
December 4, 2025 at 7:24 PM
my tummy hurts today but i’m being so brave about it 😔