Catherine Robertson
@cjrauthor.bsky.social
Author of Flora Valley, Miss Lovelock and Imperfect Lives series romcoms (catherinejrobertson.com) she/her, trans rights, vote Green, owner of cats, dogs and chickens. Banner pic is Bernie judging you
In the event of the apocalypse, come to my place, I have corn
January 26, 2026 at 6:23 AM
In the event of the apocalypse, come to my place, I have corn
Made an amateur mistake today - spent an hour digging a stump out of the garden, put sunblock everywhere except the gap that appears between your top and your shorts when you’re bending over
a cartoon character with the words ouch ouch ouch on the bottom
Alt: Stewie from Family Guy burned from a sun lamp, walking carefully and saying ouch ouch ouch (also he is wearing a thong - I was not wearing a thong)
media.tenor.com
January 25, 2026 at 8:36 AM
Made an amateur mistake today - spent an hour digging a stump out of the garden, put sunblock everywhere except the gap that appears between your top and your shorts when you’re bending over
Post a car photo you took
January 20, 2026 at 6:05 AM
Post a car photo you took
With everything being mad and shitty, please enjoy this magnificent recounting of the time when the highway division in Florence, Oregon blew up a dead whale
The Exploding Whale
We must never forget.
open.substack.com
January 19, 2026 at 6:23 AM
With everything being mad and shitty, please enjoy this magnificent recounting of the time when the highway division in Florence, Oregon blew up a dead whale
I messaged my adult sons about Scott Adams dying and the 29 year old said “Who’s he?” which is a suitable epitaph I feel
January 14, 2026 at 4:32 AM
I messaged my adult sons about Scott Adams dying and the 29 year old said “Who’s he?” which is a suitable epitaph I feel
"6. The Wet Mist. You didn’t cover your mouth. You just baptized the conference table in your own lukewarm aerosol. You are the reason the aliens won’t talk to us. You should be legally required to wear a cone."
The Pixie Squeak: You suppress the vocalization until it sounds like a mouse being stepped on by a stiletto heel. You think this makes you dainty. It actually makes you sound like you are performing a mating call for a very specific, perverted demographic of anime fans.
Sneezes, Ranked
1. The Silent Convulsion The gold standard. A violent bodily shudder contained entirely within the torso. No noise or spray. Just a brief, grimace...
buff.ly
January 13, 2026 at 2:47 AM
"6. The Wet Mist. You didn’t cover your mouth. You just baptized the conference table in your own lukewarm aerosol. You are the reason the aliens won’t talk to us. You should be legally required to wear a cone."
Sky going off this evening in Hawke’s Bay
January 10, 2026 at 7:54 AM
Sky going off this evening in Hawke’s Bay
Reposted by Catherine Robertson
As I was walking on the stair
I met a man who wasn't there
He wasn't there again today
And what I will say to you is that we are laser focused on wishing he would go away.
I met a man who wasn't there
He wasn't there again today
And what I will say to you is that we are laser focused on wishing he would go away.
January 6, 2026 at 4:48 AM
As I was walking on the stair
I met a man who wasn't there
He wasn't there again today
And what I will say to you is that we are laser focused on wishing he would go away.
I met a man who wasn't there
He wasn't there again today
And what I will say to you is that we are laser focused on wishing he would go away.
Wordle 1,661 3/6
⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜
⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜
🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩 heh
⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜
⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜
🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩 heh
January 4, 2026 at 6:51 PM
Wordle 1,661 3/6
⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜
⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜
🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩 heh
⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜
⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜
🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩 heh
Shrek 2 is miles better than Shrek 1 #holidayviewing
January 1, 2026 at 8:07 AM
Shrek 2 is miles better than Shrek 1 #holidayviewing
I woke to find my neighbour had sent me a text at 6.30am asking if I wanted to go for a walk early before it got too hot. FYI I am still in bed at 9am.
a man is walking a dog on a leash through a store .
ALT: a man is walking a dog on a leash through a store .
media.tenor.com
December 31, 2025 at 8:01 PM
I woke to find my neighbour had sent me a text at 6.30am asking if I wanted to go for a walk early before it got too hot. FYI I am still in bed at 9am.
Rewatching Shrek and found that others have also noticed this
Anyone else notice Farquaad's flag looks like the Facebook logo, I never hear anybody talk about this
www.reddit.com
December 31, 2025 at 6:07 AM
Rewatching Shrek and found that others have also noticed this
Got free tickets to Shapeshifter last night, they were brilliant, such a mixed age group, we were engulfed in clouds of dope and candy floss vape
December 28, 2025 at 8:34 PM
Got free tickets to Shapeshifter last night, they were brilliant, such a mixed age group, we were engulfed in clouds of dope and candy floss vape
The Cancer Society 'Don't get cooked' ads featuring Polynesian-looking "kids" say they're made by AI so the profits go directly to cancer research - thus happily passing the environmental and social cost of AI onto the rest of us. Cool, cool, cool
December 27, 2025 at 8:22 PM
The Cancer Society 'Don't get cooked' ads featuring Polynesian-looking "kids" say they're made by AI so the profits go directly to cancer research - thus happily passing the environmental and social cost of AI onto the rest of us. Cool, cool, cool
Knitted Powelliphanta - what everyone should get for Christmas esp as proceeds go to snail conservation #snailfulandtriumphanta
December 24, 2025 at 11:50 PM
Knitted Powelliphanta - what everyone should get for Christmas esp as proceeds go to snail conservation #snailfulandtriumphanta
Olive gets her nails done
December 20, 2025 at 8:28 PM
Olive gets her nails done
PLR in time for Christmas! If you're a NZ author with 50 copies of each of your books circulating in NZ's library system (excl schools), then register next year via the National Library Public Lending Register #nzauthors
a cartoon of a penguin holding money and coins with the words just in time for christmas written below it
Alt: a cartoon of a penguin holding money and coins with the words just in time for christmas written below it
media.tenor.com
December 16, 2025 at 2:08 AM
PLR in time for Christmas! If you're a NZ author with 50 copies of each of your books circulating in NZ's library system (excl schools), then register next year via the National Library Public Lending Register #nzauthors
This is a hell of a song
Mel Parsons | Don't Leave the Light On
YouTube video by Mel Parsons Music
www.youtube.com
December 11, 2025 at 9:07 PM
This is a hell of a song
Movie you’ve watched more than six times with a gif. Hard mode: no Stars (Wars nor Trek), LOTR, or Marvel, Disney Animated or Pixar
December 8, 2025 at 3:58 AM
Movie you’ve watched more than six times with a gif. Hard mode: no Stars (Wars nor Trek), LOTR, or Marvel, Disney Animated or Pixar
Looks like a rejected illustration for a Philip Pullman book #nuttermail
December 1, 2025 at 12:00 AM
Looks like a rejected illustration for a Philip Pullman book #nuttermail