Count Binface
@countbinface.bsky.social
Space politician. Sane.
Boris Johnson
What he said: 20,000 more police
What he did: 23,000 fewer people
What he said: 20,000 more police
What he did: 23,000 fewer people
November 20, 2025 at 6:30 PM
Boris Johnson
What he said: 20,000 more police
What he did: 23,000 fewer people
What he said: 20,000 more police
What he did: 23,000 fewer people
I am and have always been a faithful... to galactic podcasting. And joining me on Trash Talk this week is the perfect man to celebrate a BBC triumph in a time of BBC madness. It's Paul Gorton, and we're talking Traitors and a whole lot more. Get it here! pod.fo/e/3541ce
November 18, 2025 at 5:40 PM
I am and have always been a faithful... to galactic podcasting. And joining me on Trash Talk this week is the perfect man to celebrate a BBC triumph in a time of BBC madness. It's Paul Gorton, and we're talking Traitors and a whole lot more. Get it here! pod.fo/e/3541ce
Trump. Epstein. Starmer. Reeves. BBC. Trump again. It's a Smorgasbord of Shite: join me in taking the trash out in my bumper review of the week. Free for all humans! open.substack.com/pub/countbin...
A Smorgasbord of Shite
Trump, Starmer, Epstein, another BBC Scandal - it's all happening
open.substack.com
November 14, 2025 at 8:27 PM
Trump. Epstein. Starmer. Reeves. BBC. Trump again. It's a Smorgasbord of Shite: join me in taking the trash out in my bumper review of the week. Free for all humans! open.substack.com/pub/countbin...
Kill? No.
Slay? You’d better believe it.
Slay? You’d better believe it.
November 14, 2025 at 11:33 AM
Kill? No.
Slay? You’d better believe it.
Slay? You’d better believe it.
Stool sample claims woods faeces are bear’s.
November 13, 2025 at 1:58 PM
Stool sample claims woods faeces are bear’s.
Ok President Trump, if you sue the BBC for $1bn for spreading lies, I’ll sue you for the same amount. I reckon Planet Earth would crowdfund that. Then I’ll buy Mar A Largo, turn it into a climate change research centre, free Melania, and put a 1000% tariff on orange face paint.
November 10, 2025 at 7:29 PM
Ok President Trump, if you sue the BBC for $1bn for spreading lies, I’ll sue you for the same amount. I reckon Planet Earth would crowdfund that. Then I’ll buy Mar A Largo, turn it into a climate change research centre, free Melania, and put a 1000% tariff on orange face paint.
Lest we forget.
November 9, 2025 at 11:19 AM
Lest we forget.
BRAND NEW TRASH TALK!
Joining me on the podcast is special guest @christhebarker, the genius behind the Sgt Pepper obituary montages. Plus my guide to the greatest elevens on Earth! Get the full show here: podfollow.com/trash-talk-w.... And here’s a taste!
Joining me on the podcast is special guest @christhebarker, the genius behind the Sgt Pepper obituary montages. Plus my guide to the greatest elevens on Earth! Get the full show here: podfollow.com/trash-talk-w.... And here’s a taste!
November 8, 2025 at 5:41 PM
BRAND NEW TRASH TALK!
Joining me on the podcast is special guest @christhebarker, the genius behind the Sgt Pepper obituary montages. Plus my guide to the greatest elevens on Earth! Get the full show here: podfollow.com/trash-talk-w.... And here’s a taste!
Joining me on the podcast is special guest @christhebarker, the genius behind the Sgt Pepper obituary montages. Plus my guide to the greatest elevens on Earth! Get the full show here: podfollow.com/trash-talk-w.... And here’s a taste!
Reposted by Count Binface
November 5, 2025 at 10:22 PM
There now follows a Party Political Broadcast by the Count Binface Party.
November 5, 2025 at 10:42 AM
There now follows a Party Political Broadcast by the Count Binface Party.
Reposted by Count Binface
Happy November! It's the 11th month. I am an intergalactic authority on everything. Therefore I have compiled the definitive guide to Elevens. From Rachel Reeves to my ex, get it here! open.substack.com/pub/countbin...
These Go Up To Eleven
Go-Vember! A chart like none other in the galaxy
open.substack.com
November 3, 2025 at 5:38 PM
Happy November! It's the 11th month. I am an intergalactic authority on everything. Therefore I have compiled the definitive guide to Elevens. From Rachel Reeves to my ex, get it here! open.substack.com/pub/countbin...
Happy November! It's the 11th month. I am an intergalactic authority on everything. Therefore I have compiled the definitive guide to Elevens. From Rachel Reeves to my ex, get it here! open.substack.com/pub/countbin...
These Go Up To Eleven
Go-Vember! A chart like none other in the galaxy
open.substack.com
November 3, 2025 at 5:38 PM
Happy November! It's the 11th month. I am an intergalactic authority on everything. Therefore I have compiled the definitive guide to Elevens. From Rachel Reeves to my ex, get it here! open.substack.com/pub/countbin...
Andrew does still have a title.
Clue: it’s pretty close to mine.
Clue: it’s pretty close to mine.
October 30, 2025 at 10:19 PM
Andrew does still have a title.
Clue: it’s pretty close to mine.
Clue: it’s pretty close to mine.
Oxygene Pt 4 by Jean Michel Jarre just got played by @simonmayo.bsky.social on @greatesthitsuk.bsky.social , because it's no.207 in their new Top 500 countdown. Proof if proof be needed that the people who don't vote can cause massive repercussions just like the ones who do. #MakeYourVoteCount
October 29, 2025 at 4:20 PM
Oxygene Pt 4 by Jean Michel Jarre just got played by @simonmayo.bsky.social on @greatesthitsuk.bsky.social , because it's no.207 in their new Top 500 countdown. Proof if proof be needed that the people who don't vote can cause massive repercussions just like the ones who do. #MakeYourVoteCount
Things that are making me laugh:
The Green Party have more members than the Tories.
I have more Bluesky and X followers than Zack Polanski.
#MakeYourVoteCount
The Green Party have more members than the Tories.
I have more Bluesky and X followers than Zack Polanski.
#MakeYourVoteCount
October 29, 2025 at 11:20 AM
Things that are making me laugh:
The Green Party have more members than the Tories.
I have more Bluesky and X followers than Zack Polanski.
#MakeYourVoteCount
The Green Party have more members than the Tories.
I have more Bluesky and X followers than Zack Polanski.
#MakeYourVoteCount
Reposted by Count Binface
Get the news you can trust, from an eight-foot-tall space alien with a bin for a face. My latest bulletin is out now! Featuring Trump, Strictly, Clippy, Traitors, Caerphilly and more! open.substack.com/pub/countbin...
Count Binface's Newsround
Eat this, John Craven!
open.substack.com
October 27, 2025 at 5:16 PM
Get the news you can trust, from an eight-foot-tall space alien with a bin for a face. My latest bulletin is out now! Featuring Trump, Strictly, Clippy, Traitors, Caerphilly and more! open.substack.com/pub/countbin...
Get the news you can trust, from an eight-foot-tall space alien with a bin for a face. My latest bulletin is out now! Featuring Trump, Strictly, Clippy, Traitors, Caerphilly and more! open.substack.com/pub/countbin...
Count Binface's Newsround
Eat this, John Craven!
open.substack.com
October 27, 2025 at 5:16 PM
Get the news you can trust, from an eight-foot-tall space alien with a bin for a face. My latest bulletin is out now! Featuring Trump, Strictly, Clippy, Traitors, Caerphilly and more! open.substack.com/pub/countbin...
RIP Lady Annabel Goldsmith, time-traveller.
October 18, 2025 at 10:02 PM
RIP Lady Annabel Goldsmith, time-traveller.
HOW TO SPOT A TRAITOR! (No spoilers, guaranteed.)
An official alien's guide, to kick off your weekend in style.
open.substack.com/pub/countbin...
An official alien's guide, to kick off your weekend in style.
open.substack.com/pub/countbin...
How to spot a traitor
Humans seem to be completely useless at this.
open.substack.com
October 17, 2025 at 3:19 PM
HOW TO SPOT A TRAITOR! (No spoilers, guaranteed.)
An official alien's guide, to kick off your weekend in style.
open.substack.com/pub/countbin...
An official alien's guide, to kick off your weekend in style.
open.substack.com/pub/countbin...
Keir Your Enthusiasm.
October 14, 2025 at 12:50 PM
Keir Your Enthusiasm.
I hereby declare war on premature Christmassing.
Any shop caught doing this before 1st December must be shut down and turned into affordable housing.
Choose sanity. Vote Binface.
(Photo dated 9th October 2025)
Any shop caught doing this before 1st December must be shut down and turned into affordable housing.
Choose sanity. Vote Binface.
(Photo dated 9th October 2025)
October 11, 2025 at 7:34 AM
I hereby declare war on premature Christmassing.
Any shop caught doing this before 1st December must be shut down and turned into affordable housing.
Choose sanity. Vote Binface.
(Photo dated 9th October 2025)
Any shop caught doing this before 1st December must be shut down and turned into affordable housing.
Choose sanity. Vote Binface.
(Photo dated 9th October 2025)
BRAND NEW TRASH TALK! The latest episode of my award-binning podcast is out now, featuring special guest @_SeanOGrady from the Independent. Get it here. pod.fo/e/339469 Expect fireworks, like these! www.youtube.com/watch?v=qjNK...
Count Binface at the Independent: Policy Grilling
YouTube video by Count Binface
www.youtube.com
October 9, 2025 at 4:13 PM
BRAND NEW TRASH TALK! The latest episode of my award-binning podcast is out now, featuring special guest @_SeanOGrady from the Independent. Get it here. pod.fo/e/339469 Expect fireworks, like these! www.youtube.com/watch?v=qjNK...
What a night.
Max Fosh in Clash of The Comics.
Niko Omilana in #CelebrityTraitors.
Only one organism has beaten both of them AND pledged to make Claudia Winkleman’s fringe Grade 1 Listed.
Choose love. Choose Binface.
Max Fosh in Clash of The Comics.
Niko Omilana in #CelebrityTraitors.
Only one organism has beaten both of them AND pledged to make Claudia Winkleman’s fringe Grade 1 Listed.
Choose love. Choose Binface.
October 8, 2025 at 7:55 PM
What a night.
Max Fosh in Clash of The Comics.
Niko Omilana in #CelebrityTraitors.
Only one organism has beaten both of them AND pledged to make Claudia Winkleman’s fringe Grade 1 Listed.
Choose love. Choose Binface.
Max Fosh in Clash of The Comics.
Niko Omilana in #CelebrityTraitors.
Only one organism has beaten both of them AND pledged to make Claudia Winkleman’s fringe Grade 1 Listed.
Choose love. Choose Binface.